Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Why Get drunk?! Pina Colada Jelly Belly Jelly Beans Taste As Good As The Drink!

Pina Colada Jelly Belly Jelly Beans - 10 lbs bulk
Click to buy directly from Jelly Belly!

The Good: Tastes just like pina colada, Environmentally responsible bulk
The Bad: Not terribly nutritious, Taste fades quickly with eating a lot of these beans!
The Basics: An excellent flavor of Jelly Belly, Pina Colada satisfies before the taste fades!

I'm not a drinker. In fact, I have been sober for almost twenty years now, which is quite an accomplishment for me, I think. Still, there are times I crave a drink and let me tell you, there are flavors that haunt me still. Irish creme, kahula, mint juleps . . . sigh, those were the days. The other flavor that I miss is pina coladas. However, I have had cause and ability to enjoy that flavor since my sobriety began. Virgin pina coladas remain one of the few drinks I'll actually order when at a restaurant. And when I'm not in restaurants, sometimes, I just fill a wine glass full of Pina Colada Jelly Bellys. Some nights, that's enough.

For those who might never have had Jelly Belly jelly beans, these are easily the best jelly beans on the planet, packing a lot of flavor into a very small size. Unlike most jelly beans which are only vaguely flavored and are more based on colors, Jelly Belly jelly beans have a wide variety of actual flavors, like Pink Grapefruit, Sour Blueberry, Dr. Pepper, or their signature flavor Buttered Popcorn.

Who needs ten pounds of Pina Colada flavored Jelly Belly's? Those of us who cannot drink make a great customer base. After all, for those of us who need to stay sober, we can pretty much transfer a month's drinking budget into a six-month supply of these Jelly Belly jelly beans!


Pina Colada is a flavor of Jelly Belly jelly beans. Jelly Belly jelly beans are approximately one half inch long by one quarter inch wide and they are roughly bean-shaped. These little candies are marketed to taste precisely like pineapple and these do that well. They are sweet, have no scent, which might account for the lightness of the pineapple flavoring.

Pina Colada flavored Jelly Bellys are available in a wide array of quantities, but the largest quantity available is the ten pound bulk case. This is a decent-sized box with a plastic lining and while some might wonder why anyone would need a ten pound box, I say given the choice between being a mean girl drink drunk and putting on a pound or two from jelly beans, I'll take the latter. The Pina Colada flavor is one that is good and a ten pound case ought to last an entire year, though mine have never lasted more than six months. They would certainly keep for a year even in this level of bulk, but my case never seems to last nearly that long.

The Pina Colada Jelly Belly is fairly easy to differentiate from the other yellow Jelly Bellys. It is a solid, opaque light yellow and looks most like the Buttered Popcorn flavor. Fortunately, Buttered Popcorn is white with yellow spots; pina colada is solid yellow.

Ease Of Preparation

These are jelly beans, not staying sober while trying to date in the bar scene! Preparing them is as easy as opening the box and popping one (or several) into your mouth. In the case of the ten pound box, one might want to put them in a candy dish of some form as opposed to always going into the box. Temperance, after all, is a virtue.


As with all of the best Jelly Belly flavors, the strength of Pina Colada flavored Jelly Belly's is that they taste exactly like the flavor they claim to. The Pina Colada flavor tastes exactly like a pina colada, without the tart aftertaste. This tastes like a perfect mix of pineapple and coconut and it works perfectly to satisfy the taste craving for a pina colada. There is no scent to these Jelly Bellys but they carry the flavor strong enough without one!

Unfortunately, the pina colada flavor fades fast. It is a strong pina colada flavor to begin with, but after a handful, these just taste like sugar, lowering their overall appeal. There is a sharp and delicious initial flavor of pina colada, but it is not enduring. Unfortunately, Pina Colada is one of the flavors of Jelly Belly jelly beans that cannot be eaten in bulk without the taste fading significantly. After a handful, the taste begins to be more generic sugar flavor.


Again, these are jelly beans, so anyone looking to them for nutrition needs to join JBEA! Jelly beans, even Jelly Belly jelly beans, are not a legitimate source of nutrition. These are a snack food, a dessert, and are in no way an adequate substitute for a real meal. A serving is listed at thirty-five beans, with each Jelly Belly jelly bean having approximately four calories. This means that in a single serving, there are 140 calories, which is 12% of your daily recommended intake.

The thing is, Jelly Belly jelly beans are not as bad as they could be in the nutrition area. They have no fat and no protein, but for those who have ever dated a Vegan, these are Vegan compliant because they contain no gelatin! They have only one percent of the daily sodium with 15 mg and they are gluten free! The main ingredients are sugar, corn syrup and modified food starch, so it's not like this is an all-natural food, but they could be far, far worse.

Pina Colada Jelly Belly jelly beans do not have any of the vitamin nutrients of actual pineapples or coconut. Fortunately, they do not have any of the liver-destroying properties of pina coladas either!


Jelly Belly jelly beans have a shelf life of approximately one year and I have yet to run across a stale Jelly Belly (though that could have something to do with a package never surviving a year around me . . .). They remain freshest when they are kept in an airtight container (the bag in the bulk box is sufficient if it is kept closed) and they ought to be kept in a lukewarm environment. Storing them in hot places or in a liquid-filled shot glass is likely to make the beans stick together and be gross. Kept in a cool, dry place, the beans retain their flavor perfectly.

As for cleanup, unless one allows the Jelly Belly to get hot to the point that the waxy coating on the bean melts, the dyes on these do not bleed or denature, so there is usually no cleanup necessary, not even washing one's hands after eating them (always wash your hands before eating Jelly Bellys; that's time enough to call your JBEA sponsor). I have never had Pina Colada Jelly Belly's stain anything.


Pina Colada Jelly Belly jelly beans are one of the best flavors of Jelly Belly jelly beans and while the ten pound case is environmentally responsible, it's unfortunate that the taste fades so fast on such a delicious jelly bean!

For other Jelly Belly flavors reviewed by me, please check out:
Lemon Lime
A&W Cream Soda


For other food and drink reviews, please be sure to visit my index page by clicking here!

© 2011, 2008 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.

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