Exploit Stupidity: Yoga Hosers Is Awful.

The Good: Production design, Competent supporting performances
The Bad: Terrible characters, Astonishingly horrible plot, Most of the special effects, Lackluster acting, Exploitative quality. Most of the film is not funny at all.
The Basics: Kevin Smith's Yoga Hosers clogs the cinematic marketplace with garbage based on name recognition instead of anything approaching quality.


It used to be, as a cinephile, that when there was a new film written and directed by Kevin Smith, it was an event. Smith had a very interesting (as it turns out now, early) career arc as a darling of indie cinema and he hit a creative peak with Dogma (reviewed here!). But, when film distributors wanted to make more than ten million dollars at the box office for an opening weekend and Smith went commercial with Cop Out (reviewed here!) (it's funny how few people ever consider Mallrats a sell-out, as it was just a Kevin Smith film with an actual budget!), Smith quickly eroded his street cred. By the time he switched his storytelling focus with Red State (reviewed here!), he could barely open a film in wide release cinematically and he pretty much milked to death the cottage industry surrounding his name recognition (i.e. public appearances and DVDs of his public appearances talking about his past works). Around the time Red State was released, Kevin Smith publicly talked about how he was pretty much done with writing and directing - he announced that he had a "hockey movie" and Clerks III he wanted to do and then he was hanging up his spurs. His plans changed, apparently, and Tusk, various episodes of The Flash and Yoga Hosers were the result.

Yoga Hosers is a Kevin Smith film - written and directed - that serves as a vehicle for young actresses Lily-Rose Depp and Harley Quinn Smith (Kevin Smith's daughter) to break out on their own . . . while still surrounded by the famous actors, directors, and other creative types who make the viewer care at all about giving these young actors a chance to dazzle us. Unfortunately for everyone involved - and those who bother to view Yoga Hosers - there is nothing dazzling about Yoga Hosers. Instead, Yoga Hosers implicitly makes the potent argument that Kevin Smith has already given us the best he had . . . and he has nothing significant left to give.

Colleen Collette and Colleen McKenzie work at the Eh-2-Zed convenience store in Canada, when they are not so busy on their phones taking pictures with Instacan 2.0 and rocking out in the store's back room. They are excited when one night seniors from their high school, Hunter Calloway and Gordon Greenleaf, visit the Eh-2-Zed and invite them to a grade 12 party. Colleen McKenzie is allowed to go to the party if she takes her mother's switchblade, The Moyle, with her for protection. Colleen Collette wants to go to the party, but the day of, her father's girlfriend Tabitha decides to take off from work, with Bob, forcing the Colleens to work that night.

In the days between, the Colleens attend Terry Fox Preparatory school where they learn of the Canadian Nazis, led by Andronicus Arcane. After briefly losing their cameraphones and meeting the ridiculous author Guy Lapointe, the Colleens go to work the night of the "grade 12 party." When Hunter calls McKenzie, the Colleens invite the seniors to the Eh-2-Zed to party and are surprised when the guys take them up on the offer and only the pair arrive at the convenience store. They are quickly put in mortal peril when it turns out the boys are Canadian satanists who want the Colleens for virgin sacrifices and then the store is besieged by a small army of sentient Nazi bratwursts who want to kill them.

Yes, Kevin Smith's latest magnum opus centers around fifteen (and a half) year-old girls fighting off Bratzis in between reminding viewers just how unpleasant and superficial teenage girls and their cameraphones can be.

Immediately, I had high hopes for Yoga Hosers in that five production companies were credited at the beginning with working together to produce the film and my thought was "even Kevin Smith couldn't bamboozle five companies to throw money at absolute shit" and there are a couple of funny lines in the film right up front. I was wrong. Kevin Smith must be the world's most convincing huckster in his spare time to have gotten so many people to fund this absolute piece of shit (and how is it that Terry Gilliam still cannot get the funding together for The Man Who Killed Don Quixote?!).

What Smith gets right in Yoga Hosers is the production design and the casting. Fans of Kevin Smith's View Askew productions will see a lot in Yoga Hosers that creates a similar sense of reality. Yoga Hosers is packed with visual gags - the cereal boxes and product designs for products on shelves at the Eh-2-Zed and similar iconography at The Gimli Slider, etc - that make the film feel like a Kevin Smith film. The supporting cast of Yoga Hosers is well-cast, though the film feels like a series of obscure cameos before the plot actually bothers to hit its stride and start going anywhere.

But therein the fun ends.

Yoga Hosers is populated by unlikable characters who are virtually impossible to empathize with. Smith makes a smart statement implicitly through the beginning of the film, that the current generation of young people is self-absorbed and caught on their phones rather than truly ever interacting. But, Smith undermines his own point by underlining it and making it explicit with a tirade from the physical education teacher, Ms. Wicklund. In a similar fashion, the Colleens are learning yoga from an incompetent poseur, Yogi Bayer, which is delightfully satirical until the Colleens mouth off to Ms. Wicklund about the yoga she is trying to teach in school. But unlike something like Clerks II (reviewed here!) where the protagonists transition out of their stagnating lives to make fundamental changes, Yoga Hosers simply glorifies the stupidity of the protagonists and invites the antagonists to buy into their ridiculousness. The Canadian Nazis want nothing more than to get their photo into the same stupid tabloid the Colleens love (does the Instagram/Facebook generation even know what magazines are?!) and the schlock horror of the Bratzis comes far too late in the film to be even remotely interesting.

And there is an exploitative quality to Yoga Hosers. Right after the 2016 Presidential election, Harley Quinn Smith went out protesting and Kevin Smith wrote a beautiful disclaimer when he shared photographs of her protesting via social media. Smith wanted to remind people who were going to react to the photos he posted that his daughter is a seventeen year-old minor and he was sharing the pictures because he was proud of her activism. When I read that, I applauded it; the last thing a seventeen year-old needs is death threats or to be exploited/commented upon for how she looks. Kevin Smith had the right idea with trying to remind his fans that his daughter is a minor who does not deserve to be exploited or be subjected to vicious comments.

But, it does not take long into Yoga Hosers to notice that Harley Quinn Smith is being exploited in a way that Lily-Rose Depp is not. Harley Quinn Smith is outfitted in short skirts and midriff baring costumes for the bulk of Yoga Hosers. And Harley Quinn Smith is outfitted in the low-cut shirts that showcase her breasts. Outside a single shot where Lily-Rose Depp is laying on her back after a battle and her shirt rides up to expose her stomach and one mid-yoga strech shot that is hard to see as anything but an ass-shot of a girl in tight yoga pants, Depp is fully covered the entirety of Yoga Hosers. Smith is, noticeably, not. For girls who share everything, the contrast between Depp's yoga stretch pants (black) and Smith's short shorts (white) is painfully obvious and more disturbing than Kevin Smith attempting to elicit humor by moving around the moles on Guy Lapointe's face (didn't a Rob Schneider flick do that already?!) between shots. For someone who works to protect his daughter in the one context, Kevin Smith seems very willing to exploit his daughter in the other.

And therein lays the problem with Yoga Hosers on the acting front. Harley Quinn Smith is not given any big opportunities to showcase any performance talents in Yoga Hosers. Kevin Smith is adept at presenting (in script and on screen) big, deep, compelling human moments - Alan Rickman's Metatron talking to Bethany about having to be the voice of god to talk to the confused, hurt, child Jesus in Dogma perfectly illustrates that! - and Yoga Hosers is noticeably lacking in any such depth. As a result, Harley Quinn Smith and Lily-Rose Depp pal around playing exactly what they are; teenage girls doing stupid teenage girl shit. There is little real acting involved and whatever differences between the performers and their characters is not substantive or interesting in a way that allows either to plumb any sort of acting depth.

The visual effects in Yoga Hosers are pretty horrible; the Bratzis are not integrated into the main photography well (and the physics of some of their movements are obviously off) and the explosions are supposed to be comical, but they look cheesy (not even campy). On the visual effects front, Kevin Smith aspires to get to Sharknado quality CG effects. The golem looks awesome and gross, but by the time it comes into play, most viewers will already have tapped out.

Yoga Hosers is the second in a new trilogy of Kevin Smith films and viewers can only hope that his Canadian horror trilogy remains only three films (the View Askew films began as a New Jersey trilogy, but expanded beyond the three movies!) before Kevin Smith either calls it quits or creates a sequel to Dogma that rises to the level of greatness Smith has been shown to be capable of. But for those expecting anything of that quality of Yoga Hosers are only setting themselves up for disappointment.

For other works with Natasha Lyonne, please visit my reviews of:
Antibirth
Orange Is The New Black - Season 4
Orange Is The New Black - Season 3
Orange Is The New Black - Season 2
Orange Is The New Black - Season 1
Blade: Trinity
But I'm A Cheerleader

1/10

For other movie reviews, please check out my Film Review Index Page for an organized listing!

© 2016 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Ode To A "Meh" Subject: Hallmark's 2016 Batmobile Ornament Is Predictibly Underwhelming!

The Good: Good basic sculpt and coloring, Tires move!
The Bad: Seems expensive, Very simplistic coloring, Very basic sculpt
The Basics: The 2016 Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice Batmobile ornament by Hallmark recreates one of the least-interesting Batmobiles in an utterly unremarkable way.


One of the few bits of merchandising surrounding this year's Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice that actually surprised me was any recreation of the Batmobile. The Batmobile in the latest cinematic rendition of Batman was so underused as to be comparatively invisible within the overall narrative. So, I was reasonably surprised when Hallmark bothered with an ornament version of the Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice Batmobile. In some ways, it seems like Hallmark only paid lip service to the vehicle - much the way the film did - in its simplistic sculpt and coloring of Batman's transport.

For those unfamiliar with the film, Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice (reviewed here!), found Bruce Wayne being used by Lex Luthor to villify Superman following the destruction in Metropolis. Very briefly in the film, Batman confronts Superman while in the Batmobile - Superman in fact rather handily tears apart the canopy of the Batmobile to get to Batman. The 2016 Batman film ornament is the Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice Batmobile in the most basic sculpt and coloring for the vehicle.

Basics

The Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice Batmobile ornament features just the Batmobile, without any characters evident in it. The simple ornament is cast in glossy black metal and measures 4 1/4” long by 2 1/4" wide by 1 1/4” tall. Even without a sound or light feature, the 2016 Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice Batmobile ornament commanded a $17.95 initial price, which seemed especially expensive for the simplistic ornament.

The Hallmark “Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice Batmobile” ornament is very basically cast in black metal. It includes the Batmobile’s flattened fins on the top, rounded cockpit and very wide, stable-looking form. The Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice Batmobile ornament is very simplistic, though it does have the front guns molded on and the wheels do move. The finest detail on the ornament, arguably, are the treads on the tires. The rest of the sculpt lacks any genuine nuance or detail to it.

The coloring of the Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice Batmobile ornament is incredibly simplistic. While there are little red and yellow dots painted on for the headlights and supplemental lights, the rest of the ornament is just black. The Batmobile is comparatively clean, without any weathering or damage to it to make it look like Batman has actually used it to fight crime. The simplistic, homogeneous coloring is unfortunately underwhelming.

Features

Unlike most Hallmark Keepsake ornaments, the 2016 “Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice Batmobile” has no light or sound effect, just moveable tires. There is nothing special about this Batmobile, which is unfortunate as it commands a similar price to prior Batmobiles that did have light or sound functions for them!

Balance

As with all ornaments, the intent of the Hallmark Keepsake “Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice Batmobile” ornament is to be hung on a Christmas Tree. And for those creating the ultimate DC Comics-themed Christmas Tree, the “Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice Batmobile” ornament is an underwhelming addition. The ornament has a steel hook loop embedded into the top of the Batmobile, right atop the canopy. The loop's location is fairly obvious given it is on top of the vehicle and it is necessary for the ornament. The “Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice Batmobile” ornament is well-balanced from that location. The vehicle is supposed to be level and it is properly balanced to pull that off.

Collectibility

Hallmark Keepsake began delving into the collectibles market in 1991 with Star Trek when it introduced the exceptionally limited edition original U.S.S. Enterprise ornament (reviewed here!). Within a few years, virtually every classic film franchise, persona, and pop culture icon jumped on the bandwagon and began merchandising with Hallmark as well. Classic properties like Marilyn Monroe, The Wizard Of Oz and both Marvel and DC Comics have been made into Hallmark Keepsake Christmas ornaments. The “Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice Batmobile” is one of five DC Comicsa ornaments on the market in 2016. Fans of the film do not seem to be finding this ornament irresistible, as it appears perfectly available at every Hallmark Keepsake store I have been to since it was released in October. Given how little the Batmobile was actually used in Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice, the odds are that even after the holidays it will be a poor investment piece.

Overview

Fans of Batman, Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice, Batmobiles and Hallmark ornaments are likely to find the Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice Batmobile ornament simplistic and expensive for its price. The ornament is not exciting and recreates one of the least-distinctive Batmobiles to ever grace the screen.

For other DC Universe Hallmark ornaments, please check out my reviews of:
2016 Supergirl DC SuperHero Girls ornament
2016 Wonder Woman Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice ornament
2015 Lynda Carter As Wonder Woman
2014 Bane The Dark Knight Rises (Limited Edition)
2014 1989 Batmobile
2014 Defender Of Mankind Superman
2013 Man Of Steel
2013 Descending Upon Gotham City Batman ornament
2012 The Bat The Dark Knight Rises Limited Edition Ornament
2012 Catwoman ornament
2012 "Beware My Power" Green Lantern ornament
2012 The Dark Knight Rises
2011 Batman Takes Flight
2011 Green Lantern
2010 Limited Edition Harley Quinn
2009 Wonder Woman ornament

3.5/10

For other ornament reviews, please visit my Ornament Review Index Page for an organized listing!

© 2016 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Self Destruction, Thy Name Is Sorenson In NYPD Blue Season 8

The Good: Good character development, Wonderful performances, Plot development
The Bad: No DVD extras, Moments of awkward character mix, Some repetitive-feeling plots
The Basics: NYPD Blue The Complete Season Eight was one of the more tumultuous seasons with characters coming and going, but is still a wonderful season of developing interesting characters!


There are few shows that successfully reinvented themselves over their long runs like NYPD Blue. NYPD Blue not only switched up partners for Andy Sipowicz, but as the series went on, the show managed to reinvent themselves with bringing on new bosses for the 15th Precinct. Season Eight of NYPD Blue was arguably one of the most tumultuous - opening down one character and losing three of the main cast be season's end. The eighth season of NYPD Blue seemed to illustrate that the show was feeling some competition from Law & Order in that it immediately introduced a new District Attorney character, in the form of Valerie Heywood, before changing up any members of the 15th Precinct.

The eighth season of NYPD Blue has its rocky moments, but is surprisingly solid on DVD. While the season largely neglects Greg Medavoy and puts Andy Sipowicz squarely in the middle of romantic problems, the overall arc of Season Eight is the downfall of Danny Sorenson. NYPD Blue Season Eight picks up where the seventh season (reviewed here!) ended and it is impossible to discuss the eighth season without some references to where the seventh season ended. Following Kirkendall's departure and the way Sorenson led the squad to nab her ex-husband and his disgraced cop buddy, Denby, NYPD Blue got mired in the consequences of that and sorting those consequences out takes pretty much the entire season.

Six months after Kirkendall fled New York and Theo Sipowicz began to experience severe health problems that worried Andy, Andy leaves work early to get tests for Theo (even though the doctors want to wait a week). Andy's continued absence and insecurities lead Danny Sorenson and Diane Russell to work closer and when Kirkendall's case is reopened by Internal Affairs, Russell and Sorenson have to rely upon Harry Denby to exonerate the Squad. But, when Don Kirkendall is killed in prison, the 15th Precinct is allowed to get back to business on its own. Denby, fired off the job, continues to get in deeper and deeper with the drug cartel that Don Kirkendall was involved with. That leads to an exceptionally bad day for Russell - who has to stop Denby in a hostage situation - and Sorenson, who (influenced by a remark by Denby) roughs up a suspect and is suspended.

While Sorenson is suspended, the squad gets a floater, Detective Connie McDowell and Fancy thinks she fits in well, keeping her on even after Sorenson returns. Fancy takes his Captain's test and after helping Captain Bass out on a case where his wife is implicated in the crime, he is promoted out of the squad. After a potential new Lieutenant is proven to be a very poor fit for the 15th Precinct, Fancy calls in a favor that gets Lieutenant Tony Rodriguez assigned to lead after he leaves. Rodriguez is an initially excellent fit, but when the ramifications of her grief and her fall-out with Sorenson weighs upon her, Diane Russell takes a medical leave. In the wake of her leaving, Sorenson falls in with a topless dancer who is working out of a mob-run club and Sipowicz gets worried about him when he goes missing.

Blended throughout the main plot is a subplot involving Andy Sipowicz and his romantic life. At the season's outset, he is leaning heavily on Katie Sipowicz to help him keep care of Theo. Katie starts to want more and when Andy goes on a date with Eddie Gibson's niece, Cynthia. But when Cynthia and Gibson have a grapevine behind Sipowicz's back, it becomes too much for him to handle and he ends the relationship. That leaves the door open for Katie to return and she does, wanting to be a real family with Andy and Theo.

Amidst the overall arcs are episodic cases that act as a medium for the police squad setting of NYPD Blue. In the eighth season, cases involve a john who slices off half a man's penis, a drug dealer is given a baby as collateral for a deal, Andy is involved in confronting suspects while off duty, a cold case is brought to the squad by a twitchy suspect who is trying to avoid a minor charge of his own, and Medavoy tries to help one of his friends with his story until a shooting goes very wrong for him.

NYPD Blue is more about characters than it is the episodic elements of the weekly cases. In the eighth season of NYPD Blue, the characters are:

Andy Sipowicz - Relying more on Katy during Theo's illness, he becomes fully paranoid that Theo might die. After a crisis of faith, he pushes to have Theo's tests done early and when Theo's tests show his health is improving, he has a day where he is outright giddy. When Katy leaves because of how emotionally difficult her relationship with Andy is getting, he starts dating, overcoming his discomfort and using John as his sitter. Shortly thereafter, he starts worrying about Sorenson and Russell. When Sorenson is suspended, he cuts his partner out. Despite that, he finds what he needs to exonerate Sorenson and tries to give him another chance. He makes peace with Fancy once and for all after he shoots at a car full of thieves. As his personal relationships fall apart, he tries to rescue Sorenson from himself,

Danny Sorenson - Acting as a liaison between Russell and Denby, he discovers that Russell is being pulled by a number of different people (including Bobby's childhood friend Ray Salvo). He and Russell have sex, but when Russell is made uncomfortable about how it makes her feel, Sorenson reacts poorly to the break-up. When a man he has in protective custody is released by an inattentive desk sergeant, he throws a tantrum which leads to a very awkward apology for him. After getting reamed out by Fancy shortly after Denby implies he and Diane had hooked up, he gets violent on a coked-out suspect, corrupting a very public case. After being suspended and exonerated through other evidence on the case, he is brought back in time to return the favor to Andy. But when Diane starts dating someone else, he wigs out and starts dating a topless dancer, going undercover in a dangerous situation,

Arthur Fancy - When Russell and Sorenson are outed publicly, he has to call them on the carpet. He goes to take a computer course, which puts him fairly high on the list to make Captain's list. When his replacement is a ballbreaking Lieutenant who does not fit with the squad, he calls in his favor with Captain Bass before moving on,

Greg Medavoy - Working fairly well with Baldwin, he is the first called for an Internal Affairs interview and manages to give up nothing, though he is able to bring a message back to the Squad from the interview. He helps his old buddy recover a victim of a Chinese kidnapping ring, against all odds. He nudges Jones and Heywood together and when a bodega owner who he has helped before gets into a jam, he tries very hard to help the man with his story in order to help him out, though it goes wrong for him,

Baldwin "D" Jones - While working with Medavoy, he hooks up with a reporter briefly. He is sensitive to a suspect's racism and is able to keep an innocent man out of prison by pushing the racial angle of the case. He and Heywood clash over her desire to get convictions and he initially resents Greg trying to hook them up, ostensibly because they are both black. He comes to respect Heywood and pushes to socialize with her outside work,

Valerie Heywood - A new Assistant District Attorney, she is tough as nails and promises to deliver convictions if the members of the 15th Precinct give her good facts. She and Baldwin spar over a case where a black man is framed by a rich white woman and she leans toward charging the man. She leaps on Sorenson when he beats a suspect. She works very hard to keep work and her relationships separate, which is made difficult when she starts seeing Jones and they both have bad days that wiegh on them outside work,

Detective Connie McDowell - Initially brought on as a floater, she resists the idea of working under Lieutenant Dalto. She finds Rodriguez attractive and happily works for him. She starts working with Sipowicz to track down Sorenson when he goes missing. She and Diane have to recover a witness for a case Heywood has to retry, which leads her to confess that she has a daughter she once gave up, but still keeps an eye upon,

Lieutenant Tony Rodriguez - An easygoing squad leader, he takes over at the last minute when Fancy gets Dalto replaced. He is a legend in Narcotics Division and he comes to the 15th Precinct as his first Detective Squad. He is kind and watches as much as possible initially, though he stands up for his squad when others come in to claim jurisdiction on his new turf. He authorizes Sorenson going undercover,

John Irving - He starts babysitting for Theo when Andy starts dating. He clues the squad into Dalto's nature before she arrives and instantly assesses her as a bad fit for the 15th Precinct. He stands up for Sipowicz and the other detectives when a gay IRS agent alledges a bias,

and Diane Russell - Troubled by Denby manipulating her and her coworkers, she falls into bed with Sorenson. Uncomfortable at how that makes her feel, especially when he is protective of her on the street, she tries to break up with him gently before things get worse for them. After they break up, they work on developing a friendship. It is going all right until Bobby's cardiologist comes back into her life and she decides to make a go of that relationship. On McDowell's advice, she takes a hardship leave.

As one might expect from the eighth season of NYPD Blue, the established actors all know their roles. Garcelle Beauvais, Charlotte Ross, and Esai Morales each hit the ground running and gel remarkably quickly with the established cast members. Bill Brotchrup and Gordon Clapp are largely neglected as Irving and Medavoy for the season, but they do decent supporting work when given the opportunity.

As with the prior seasons since Shout! Factory started producing the DVD sets of NYPD Blue, there are no bonus features on the eighth season discs. This is disappointing as the initial seasons had both commentary tracks and featurettes and they are missed at this point in the series.

Ultimately, though, NYPD Blue Season Eight is an important transition season that reorders the characters to set up the last great era of the show with a solid foundation.

For other works from the 2000 - 2001 television season, please visit my reviews of:
The X-Files - Season 8
The West Wing - Season 2
Frasier - Season 8
Once & Again - Season 2
Angel - Season 2
Buffy The Vampire Slayer - Season 5
Family Guy - Season 3
Friends - Season 7
Gilmore Girls - Season 1
The Simpsons - Season 12
Sex And The City - Season 3
Strangers With Candy - Season 3
Star Trek: Voyager - Season 7

5/10

For other television reviews, please be sure to check out my Television Review Index Page for an organized list of all my television and movie reviews!

© 2016 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Rage Against Supergirl: Supergirl: Volume 5 - Red Daughter Of Krypton

The Good: Interesting character direction for Kara Zor-El, Good artwork
The Bad: Very basic plot
The Basics: Supergirl: Volume 5 - Red Daughter Of Krypton places Kara Zor-El within the ranks of the Red Lanterns and pits her against her oldest enemy!


It has been a while since I read any of the Red Lantern-focused books. Come to think of it, it has been a long time since I picked up Green Lantern, too. But, as I make my way through The New 52 library of Supergirl, the Red Lanterns rear their disgusting heads. Their appearance comes in Supergirl: Volume 5 - Red Daughter Of Krypton when Kara Zor-El joins the Red Lantern Corps.

Supergirl: Volume 5 - Red Daughter Of Krypton picks up after the events of Supergirl: Volume 4 – Out Of The Past (reviewed here!) and it completes the arc for Kara as someone who has been kicked around by the whole universe. Rather nicely, Supergirl: Volume 5 - Red Daughter Of Krypton is the entire arc of Kara Zor-El as a Red Lantern from beginning to end!

Opening with Lobo hunting a bounty, Supergirl arrives at Dr. Veritas's facility where she discovers her entire staff appears like her - both in appearance and genetically. Veritas runs tests, which confirm the Kryptonite poisoning is no longer afflicting Supergirl. Veritas is being hunted to the core of the Earth by Lobo, who Supergirl goes to try to speak with only to be attacked. When Supergirl appears to kill Lobo, Veritas's staff is thrilled at the opportunity to dissect and study the corpse of a Czarnian. Lobo is not dead, however, and after playing possum, he incapacitates Veritas's staff and takes out Supergirl. But Veritas escapes to her containment area and sets free Blaze and unleashes a yellow sun orb that super-powers Supergirl. In the ensuing fight, Veritas teleports Lobo and Supergirl out and Lobo taps into Kara's rage to keep her off-guard. That rage, however, calls forth the power of the Red Lanterns and a ring arrives for Kara.

Kara is transformed into a Red Lantern and Siobhan is the first person on the scene. Red Lantern Supergirl attacks Siobhan and Siobhan reluctantly taps into the power of the Silver Banshee to save her own life. To save Earth, the Silver Banshee convinces the Red Lantern to take her thirst for revenge elsewhere and Red Lantern Supergirl flies out to the stars to find who or what destroyed Krypton. Supergirl joins the Red Lantern Corps to protect Grax from the invading Diasporans. In The Block, Blaze is free and starts a hunt for Supergirl and Silver Banshee. Kara tells Guy Gardner - who is leading the Red Lanterns in Atrocitus's absence - that she wants to eradicate the Diasporans and the Worldkillers. The Red Lanterns travel to Primeen where they hunt a new, rogue Red Lantern and try to prevent her from joining Atrocitus. Atrocitus and Dex-Starr hunt the new Red Lantern and before that hunt is resolved, Guy Gardner kicks Kara out and sends her to Mogo to be de-ringed. Kara rejects that, though, and heads to Earth where she finds the Diasporans and Worldkiller-1 waiting for her! Worldkiller-1's armor attacks and attempts to absorb Kara in order to make her the ultimate judge of the universe! To stop the Worldkiller armor and save Earth, Kara must make a choice between being a Red Lantern or being herself!

Supergirl: Volume 5 - Red Daughter Of Krypton has a good arc for Kara Zor-El as she has spent the entire four volumes before this being betrayed, abandoned, and manipulated. Here, the universe recognizes her pain for the angry potential it represents and rewards her with a Red Lantern ring. Kara's time in the Red Lantern Corps allows her the opportunity to put an end to creatures reminiscent of the Worldkillers that plagued her from her arrival on Earth and affords a few Red Lanterns the opportunity to make some beautifully cutting barbs at her expense.

Siobhan Smythe is well characterized in Supergirl: Volume 5 - Red Daughter Of Krypton. She is granted almost a solid chapter to wrestle with being the Silver Banshee and while the book leaves the whole Blaze hunt for her and Supergirl unresolved, Smythe is a solid friend to Kara and Earth in the book.

The artwork in Supergirl: Volume 5 - Red Daughter Of Krypton is good, with vibrant colors one might expect of a Lantern-themed book. The character design for Red Lantern Supergirl is good and not exploitatative, which is appropriate. The movement in the fights is decent and the static shots are well-rendered. There is a good balance between action and dialogue in Supergirl: Volume 5 - Red Daughter Of Krypton.

Ultimately, the conflict in Supergirl: Volume 5 - Red Daughter Of Krypton is surprisingly basic after the set-up and there are massive subplots which remain noticeably unresolved. But, for the bulk of Supergirl: Volume 5 - Red Daughter Of Krypton, there is a solid story being told and it is well worth the read for fans of Supergirl and the assorted Lantern Corps!

For other Supergirl New 52 works, be sure to visit my reviews of:
Volume 1 - Last Daughter Of Krypton
Voluime 2 - Girl In The World
Volume 3 - Sanctuary

6/10

For other graphic novel reviews, be sure to check out my Graphic Novel Review Index Page for an organized listing of all the graphic novel reviews I have written!

© 2016 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Weeping Angels And The End Of The Universe Chase Doctor Who Through "Flesh And Stone!"

The Good: Good characterization of River Song, Decent exploration of the crack in the universe, Moments of performance
The Bad: Matt Smith's performance undermines the entire mood of the episode, Stretched concept
The Basics: Doctor Who makes an upside-down episode with "Flesh And Stone," which awkwardly resolves the threat of the Weeping Angels and explores the natures of River Song and the crack in the universe.


There are very few shows that I have encountered that belabor a two-part episode like Doctor Who. "Flesh And Stone" is the second part of a two-parter begun in "The Time Of Angels" (reviewed here!) and, as such, it is impossible to discuss the second part without some references to where the first part ended. When I write that Doctor Who belabors the two-part episodes, "The Time Of Angels" is actually an excellent example. Objectively viewed, "The Time Of Angels" stretched a number of plot points out in order to make it a two-parter with "Flesh And Stone." Indeed, a good portion of the episode is spent with The Doctor and River Song finally working up to the realization that everyone is surrounded by Weeping Angels.

"Flesh And Stone" picks up with the menace of a Maze Of Death filled with Weeping Angels and The Doctor, River Song, Amy Pond and the religious/military force led by Father Octavian fleeing them. Amy Pond is, essentially, infected by a Weeping Angel and the entire episode is a race through the downed ship that had been carrying the lone Weeping Angel.

Picking up seconds after The Doctor fired his gun, The Doctor, River, Amy and the surviving soldiers effectively make the leap onto the hull of the crashed ship. Stuck in a corridor in the ship's outer hull, the team finds themselves pursued by the Weeping Angels and The Doctor needs to power off the lights in order to divert power to the door. The Doctor, then River, notice that Amy has begun a countdown from ten, which does not appear to correspond to anything going on around them. The Doctor wants to make an escape through the ship's oxygen factory - which is a forest connected to ship's life support.

When the Weeping Angels make contact with The Doctor, he learns that there is a Weeping Angel in Amy's eye and the crack from Amy Pond's childhood bedroom has followed them to the crashed ship. The Doctor believes that the crack is a visualization of the end of the universe and barely escapes with his team into the forest. When The Doctor, Octavian and River have to head for the command center of the ship, Amy is left in the forest with the rest of Octavian's forces. Octavian reveals the truth of River Song's relationship to The Doctor, much to his chagrin. As the people defending Amy investigate the crack in the ship, they disappear and the surviving soldiers forget all about their comrades and the Weeping Angels descend upon The Doctor. Getting to the flight deck, the Doctor and River work to save Amy from the Weeping Angels!

"Flesh And Stone" continues to play The Doctor as somewhat ridiculous. Matt Smith's incarnation of The Doctor is a generally humorous iteration of the character and in "Flesh And Stone" the silliness and lack of professionalism plays poorly. The concept of the Weeping Angel reproducing through a live host like Amy is a pretty terrifying notion. Unfortunately, The Doctor combating the frightening Weeping Angels is a clown, which undermines the horror that is the Weeping Angels. Unlike "The Time Of Angels," which continued the frightening nature of the Weeping Angels from "Blink" (reviewed here!), "Flesh And Stone" undermines their menace. In "Flesh And Stone," the Weeping Angels are transformed from a specific time-feeding entity into a pretty generic killing machine monster.

What "Flesh And Stone" does well is continue the characterization of River Song. River Song in "Flesh And Stone" is revealed by Octavian to be his prisoner. River Song, as it turns out, is a prisoner in Storm Cage Prison in the native time of the episode. Song is currently paroled, which does not entirely jive with the events of "The Time Of Angels." Song is first seen on the ship (before it crashes); it is not at all clear within the two-parter why Octavian let Dr. Song loose on the ship without his supervision. Octavian and his people know there is a Weeping Angel on the ship and they enlist Dr. Song to help them get the angel, but when they seed her onto the ship (apparently about four days earlier than the events of "Flesh And Stone"), they don't go with her to get the Weeping Angel themselves?! It reeks of contrivance.

That said, the further characterization of River Song is well done. Dr. Song is presented as professional, smart, and brilliant - on par with The Doctor. As The Doctor hatches his plan, she figures things out with him. Alex Kingston plays River Song wonderfully.

Unfortunately, the portrayal of The Doctor makes for a very fractured episode in a lot of ways. Matt Smith plays The Doctor as silly and amid the menace of the time crack and Weeping Angels, that is a poor counterpoint for the mood of "Flesh And Stone." When Smith's Doctor has a temper tantrum, the episode seems suddenly banal and dull; the inconsistency is upsetting.

At the other end of the spectrum, "Flesh And Stone" does a decent job of continuing exploring the nature of the crack in the universe that is following Amy Pond around through time and space. The rupture is clearly linked to Amy Pond and The Doctor manages to use the crack to work to defeat the Weeping Angels. But, the episode's horror is undermined by a problematic rendition of The Doctor; he is hardly the hero of "Flesh And Stone" and it holds up poorly.

[Knowing that single episodes are an inefficient way to get episodes, it's worth looking into Doctor Who - The Complete Fifth Season on DVD or Blu-Ray, which is also a better economical choice than buying individual episodes. Read my review of the debut season of Matt Smith as The Doctor here!
Thanks!]

For other works with Karen Gillan, please check out my reviews of:
The Big Short
Guardians Of The Galaxy
Oculus

5/10

For other Doctor Who episode and movie reviews, please visit my Doctor Who Review Index Page!

© 2016 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Unfortunately Available For A Limited Time, Edy's Vermont Maple Syrup Ice Cream Is Fun!

The Good: Good flavor, Good ingredients, Inexpensive, Not the worst ice cream on the nutrition front
The Bad: Limited time nature, Could be more syrupy for my tastes!
The Basics: Edy’s Vermont Maple Syrup Ice Cream is good, though it is hardly the most maple of ice creams I have tried!


It is hard for me not to get excited about limited edition flavors of ice cream. I love ice cream and I adore variety to shake up my diet. When my wife told me of the existence of Edy's Vermont Maple Syrup ice cream, I began a quest almost immediately to find some! My quest was fulfilled today when the ice cream arrived in my little out of the way town. Edy's Vermont Maple Syrup ice cream was worth tracking down, but as I considered the ice cream two things occurred to me: I have had maple flavored ice creams before (and they were good) and more than anything else, Edy's is competing with simply pouring real maple syrup on vanilla ice cream with their Vermont Maple Syrup Ice Cream.

Edy’s Vermont Maple Syrup Ice Cream is fair competition for ice cream with maple syrup poured over it, but those who are likely to put maple syrup over their vanilla ice cream are likely to use more syrup than Edy's does in this ice cream. As a result, the vanilla ice cream in the Edy's Vermont Maple Syrup Ice Cream actually competes pretty effectively with the maple syrup in the ice cream.

Basics

Edy’s ice cream comes in a one and a half quart cylindrical container. The Vermont Maple Syrup Ice Cream is a smooth, creamy ice cream: the basic ice cream with maple syrup swirled throughout. The maple syrup in the ice cream is very effectively rationed, so while it might not be prevalent in a quantity that truly bowled me over, there was not a single bite of the Vermont Maple Syrup Ice Cream I've yet had that lacked some syrup in it. At (locally) $4.99 a half gallon, the Edy’s ice cream is an affordable, mid-range ice cream. This is a Limited Edition ice cream, available from Edy’s only for the past few weeks and for an indeterminate amount of time.

Ease Of Preparation

Edy’s Vermont Maple Syrup Ice Cream is a very basic ice cream. As an ice cream, preparation is ridiculously simple: one need only open the top of the container, scoop out a half cup and consume! There is no trick to preparing or eating the Vermont Maple Syrup Ice Cream.

Taste

The Vermont Maple Syrup Ice Cream smells lightly of syrup, though the scent of the vanilla ice cream base gives it a run for its money in the aroma department. The scent of both the ice cream and syrup comes out more as the ice cream moves toward its melting point.

The Edy’s Vermont Maple Syrup ice cream is perfectly blended to taste like vanilla ice cream and real maple syrup. The sweetness of the syrup is somewhat offset by the potent vanilla flavor, which manifests like a true vanilla - meaning it has a dry quality to its overall flavor palate. The syrup flavors the ice cream without ever overwhelming it, so the Edy's Vermont Maple Syrup ice cream never tastes so sweet as to be unbearable or in any way awkward.

Edy's Vermont Maple Syrup ice cream has no real aftertaste, which is somewhat surprising.

Nutrition

The Edy’s Vermont Maple Syrup Ice Cream is a very light, smooth, ice cream with no additives. The one and a half quart container represents twelve half-cup servings. In the half-cup serving, there are 100 calories, 15 of which are from fat. The one and a half grams of fat represent 2% of the RDA of fat, with 5% of one’s RDA of saturated fat coming in the single gram of saturated fat in this ice cream. One serving has 20 mg of cholesterol (that’s 7% of the RDA!) and 40 mg of Sodium (2% RDA). The only other real nutrient is two grams of protein, though there is also 6% of the RDA of Calcium and 4% of the RDA of Vitamin A in the Vermont Maple Syrup Ice Cream.

Edy’s has decent ingredients, too. Made primarily of Non-Fat Milk, sugar, and corn syrup, Vermont Maple Syrup is a decent ice cream! There is nothing unpronounceable in the ingredients list. Obviously, it contains milk ingredients. Some of the ingredients may be genetically engineered and the Vermont Maple Syrup ice cream is not marked as Kosher or gluten free.

Storage/Clean-Up

Edy’s ice cream is both a frozen and a dairy product, so it is pretty obvious that it must be kept frozen in order to remain viable. Kept frozen it remains fresh for months (my half gallon had an expiration date of May 26, 2017).

The Vermont Maple Syrup ice cream is very light white ice cream that will stain dark colored fabrics. The syrup swirled throughout the ice cream is predictably sticky and it will stain lighter colored fabrics. When the ice cream melts and gets onto fabrics, it will require one to wash it right out. On nonporous surfaces, the ice cream wipes off exceptionally easily, at least with a hot cloth.

Overall

Edy’s Vermont Maple Syrup ice cream is good, but the syrup flavor is more subtle than I would have liked. Despite that, this is an ice cream well worth tracking down and trying!

For other Edy's frozen desserts, be sure to visit my reviews of:
Caramel Delight Slow Churned Ice Cream
Cinnamon Bun Fun
Outshine Coconut Waters With Pineapple Fruit Ice Bars

8/10

For other food reviews, please visit my Food Review Index Page for an organized listing!

© 2016 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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All The Favorites Return In "The Chicago Way!"

The Good: Decent performances, Good character moments
The Bad: Incredibly problematic plot, Neglects some key character traits for the sake of plot reversals
The Basics: Legends Of Tomorrow refocuses on its own main plot with "The Chicago Way" when Eobard Thawne's team makes an ally of Al Capone in 1927 to lay a trap for the Waverider crew!


Fans of Legends Of Tomorrow have a decent reason to be upset by the massive DC Television Universe crossover event that The CW produced. After all, because Legends Of Tomorrow is the final of the four shows in the CW's airing order each week, The CW chose to end the crossover event on the Legends Of Tomorrow episode "Invasion!" (reviewed here!), despite the Waverider crew having astonishingly little to do in their own episode. Indeed, the Legends Of Tomorrow episode "Invasion!" afforded Cisco Ramon and Felicity Smoak the chance to play around in the Waverider, but it's not like the Legends Of Tomorrow resolved the Dominator invasion or fixed Barry Allen's Flashpoint tangent.

Legends Of Tomorrow essentially picks up its own storyline after the events of "Outlaw Country" (reviewed here!) in "The Chicago Way." Despite "Outlaw Country" climaxing with the call back to Earth to deal with the Dominators, the main plot ended with Eobard Thawne taking Damian Darhk into the future. "The Chicago Way" returns the two antagonists to the narrative, along with other characters missing from the narrative and another key villain from the DC Television Universe!

In Chicago, 1927, Eobard Thawne and Damian Darhk approach Al Capone with an offer, with Malcolm Merlyn. Aboard the Waverider, Heywood and Palmer train, much to the chagrin of Lance and Jackson. Jackson visits Stein, who reveals that his memories are re-orienting to his new timeline (wherein he has a daughter, Lily). When Heywood's temporal seismograph goes off, the Waverider crew heads to October, 1927. When Palmer accidentally allows Elliot Ness to get picked up by the corrupt Chicago police officers, the team returns to the Waverider and learn that days later, Al Capone will become the mayor.

When the Waverider crew saves Ness from drowning, he suffers brain damage. While Gideon cures his brain damage, Heywood impersonates him and heads to the Chelsea Club, one of Capone's clubs. While Rory hallucinates Snart, the take-down of the Chelsea Club goes south when Damien Darhk and Thawne appear and abduct Stein and Lance. In the custody of Malcolm Merlyn, Lance is offered the nine years she lost when the Queen's Gambit was destroyed back, in exchange for the amulet Thawne is after. While Rory leads the Waverider team in a rescue attempt, Stein is tortured by Thawne. But Darhk's trap is revealed when Rory's rescue attempt appears successful and puts the Waverider crew at the mercy of their enemies.

"The Chicago Way" features a ridiculous narrative progression. Heywood has a temporal seismograph, which tells the crew where and when temporal anomalies occur. Why the Waverider crew doesn't research the nature of the anomaly before they arrive in 1927 is a mystery. Actually, it is just sloppy writing. Long before the crew actually sets foot in 1927, the crew should have found how and where time was altered. Far from being a surgical strike team, the Waverider crew has become a sloppy hammer and anvil.

In a similar fashion, there is something incredibly sloppy in the way Firestorm is handled in "The Chicago Way." Jackson and Stein have a psychic bond between them. When Stein is tortured, Jax shows no adverse effects. The whole reversal surrounding Stein and his torture is entirely weakened by the fact that Jackson and Stein's psychic bond is entirely neglected in "The Chicago Way."

Martin Stein is deepened in "The Chicago Way" as he is forced to confess his temporal transgression to Lance. Stein has memories of his daughter and one of the severe problems with the way "The Chicago Way" is structured is that it eliminates any credibility to any future plotlines that might force Stein to make a choice between his daughter and his wife. Right now, Stein has memories of both his wife and his daughter; if Lily exists because his wife died as a result of the temporal aberration he caused, he should know it now. Stein and Lance have some great scenes in "The Chicago Way" and they continue to be the viable heartbeat of Legends Of Tomorrow. Lance continues to step up credibly as the leader of the Waverider crew in "The Chicago Way" by recognizing how troubled Stein appears.

While it is hard to believe that an integral character like Malcolm Merlyn could ever be killed off in a non-Arrow episode (thus gutting Lance's key scene with Merlyn), "The Chicago Way" does a good job of balancing the heroes and villains, the humor and the action in the episode. Mick Rory's hallucinations of Snart come as Rory attempts to wrestle with how has moved on since Snart's death. Rory and Jiwe continue to credibly develop beyond their initial simplistic characterizations in "The Chicago Way."

Amid all of the action and revelatory character moments, Heywood and Palmer become an effective team. Palmer and Heywood act as comic relief for much of "The Chicago Way," but their interplay is well-delivered by Nick Zano and Brandon Routh. Their performances are par for the course in "The Chicago Way," where all of the performers manage to step up for their big moments well. Zano and Routh have great comic timing, while Caity Lotz and Victor Garber share some of the season's best dramatic scenes. Fans of the DC Television Universe are likely to geek out at the mere appearance of Wentworth Miller as (hallucination) Snart and getting more of Eobard Thawne (his mission finally becomes explicit), but the regulars carry the day in "The Chicago Way," despite how sloppy the episode's plot is.

For other works with John Barrowman, please visit my reviews of:
"Invasion" - Arrow
"Legends Of Today" - The Flash
Doctor Who - Season 4
Doctor Who - Season 3
Doctor Who - Season 1
The Untouchables

[Knowing that single episodes are an inefficient way to get episodes, it's worth looking into Legends Of Tomorrow - The Complete Second Season on DVD or Blu-Ray, which is also a better economical choice than buying individual episodes. Read my review of the sophomore season of the time traveling hero team here!
Thanks!]

6.5/10

For other television season and episode reviews, please visit my Television Review Index Page for an organized listing!

© 2016 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Enter The Battle! Star Wars: Battlefront Is Worth The Time!

The Good: Exciting, Amazing graphics, Awesome variability in the multiplayer mode
The Bad: Still some glitches, Lack of a narrative
The Basics: Star Wars: Battlefront is an exciting and engaging first-person shooter game set in the Star Wars universe that allows fans to enjoy being a part of the action.


Like most Star Wars fans, I have been eagerly looking for something to keep my enthusiasm for the franchise high while waiting for Rogue One (check out my trailer review of the film here!). Over the past year, I have kept my interest in the space opera franchise with Star Wars: Battlefront. I am not a big video game fan, but a year ago when I got a Playstation 4 (reviewed here!) for my family to replace our failing Blu-Ray player, I got it with the Star Wars: Battlefront bundle and I've been playing the game for almost an entire year.

Almost every day, I play Star Wars: Battlefront and after almost a year of game play, I figured that it was time to review the game.

It is important to note that this is very much a layman's review of Star Wars: Battlefront. Professional video gamers might have a very different interpretation of the game, but as a Star Wars fan and one who came to the game without any experience with first person shooter games, I figured there would be value in reviewing Star Wars: Battlefront for those who want to know how the game is for non-professionals/non-gamers.

Basics

Star Wars: Battlefront is a video game that is broken down into the standard and online multiplayer versions of the game. Set in the Star Wars Universe, Star Wars: Battlefront allows the player to play as Rebel soldiers, Imperial soldiers and heroes (or villains) from the classic Star Wars Saga. Players play on iconic Star Wars worlds - Tatooine, Hoth, Endor - and expanded universe planets like Sulust. Even The Force Awakens is represented in the video game environment with missions on Jakuu. While there have been expansions (the Season Pass will be a future review as they are very different games in some ways!), noticeably absent from any incarnation of Star Wars: Battlefront are any adventures on Dagobah or in the asteroid field from The Empire Strikes Back.

At its core, Star Wars: Battlefront is a first-person shooter video game. I have never been a fan of shooter games, largely because I have no experience with such things and the ones I have seen footage of have not only been violent, but they have had quite a bit of gore to them. Star Wars: Battlefront does not have any gore; shot adversaries simply fall, there is no carnage in the game. That, along with my predilection for the Star Wars universe, was very appealing to me and helped me to get into the game. Regardless of the style of game within the Star Wars: Battlefront platform, the games basically involve running around shooting enemies.

Star Wars: Battlefront allows the player to play as a common soldier or as one of the heroes of the Star Wars Saga for most of the styles of game within the broader game. The core game features Luke Skywalker, Princess Leia, Han Solo, Darth Vader, Emperor Palpatine, and Boba Fett (the only hero voiced by an actor who played him in the films, in this case Temuera Morrison, who redubbed all of the Fett lines for the Star Wars DVDs) and each has special abilities and attacks that cannot be duplicated by the common soldiers. So, for example, the Emperor moves very slowly, but can set off a chain lightning attack that kills everyone within a close radius, which no other character can do. Luke Skywalker covers massive amounts of ground very fast, uses the Force to push characters to their death and wields a lightsaber, making him predictably powerful. Boba Fett's jet pack has a far longer duration and quicker recharge than any soldier's jump pack.

For the bulk of Star Wars: Battlefront, players play as common soldiers both as Rebels and Imperials. The player can play as first-person and third person. It did not take me very long to discover that the third person option was very difficult to use to hit adversaries with, whereas the first-person option had a much clearer targeting ability. Players may play with various skins that have no functional playable difference. As a result, Imperial players may play as standard Stormtroopers, Snowtroopers, Sandtroopers (with various regimental colors on the shoulder pad), Shadowtroopers (essentially TIE Fighter pilots). As DICE, the game's creator, has expanded the Star Wars: Battlefront platform, players have been able to play Imperial officers. Somewhat problematic on the Imperial side is that, just as with the Rebel side, players can play unhelmeted Imperial soldiers and while the films have had homogeneous soldiers for the Empire, but as one runs around as a Rebel, one needs to be attentive to the uniform/armor as opposed to seeing a flash of white on (for example) Tatooine and shooting. On the Rebel side, players may play with Rebel soldier or Rebel officer outfits, but with various heads, including alien heads like Twi'lek, Rodian, and Quarren.

Players have over a dozen firearm choices and over a dozen specialized weapons and tools that are activated through Star Cards - which recharge slowly after they are used - and some that require tokens found throughout the various maps to allow the player to use. The firearms range from blaster pistols shown on screen - like the style used by Han Solo and Imperial Stormtroopers - to various blaster rifles and snub blasters. Players can use guns much like were used by the Jawas - which have virtually no range, but kill with a single shot - or the EE-3, the blaster rifle utilized by Boba Fett. As a middle aged person, Star Wars: Battlefront got me hooked when I found the T-21B, a targeting rifle, because it is the only weapon with a scope that allows me to see enemies before they see me and kill me. As a novice gamer, having range and the ability to see adversaries before they kill me is a real asset.

The Star Card weapons and tools include things like jet packs, grenades, and personal shields. When one is outfitted with a Scout Pistol, they may focus for a single shot with the Star Card weapon to deliver close-range, lethal kills. Homing Shots are essentially heat-seaking rockets and the Cycler Rifle is a long-range projectile weapon that can be used to shoot through personal shields. Star Card tools like the Scan Pulse allow players to see where adversaries are within a decent radius, even if they are crouched down, hidden. In the multiplayer mode, there are goals, which might necessitate players to mix up what Star Cards and firearms they use to achieve those goals. So, for example, if one has a goal of "10 Headshots With A Blaster Pistol," the gamer might want to arm themselves with a Scout Pistol Star Card and Focus Fire, as opposed to simply utilizing one of the several blaster pistols as a primary firearm to achieve the goal. Some of the Star Card weapons - like the pulse rifle and homing shot - require the weapon to charge in order to deliver the shot, which can be irksome as the player is very easily killed while the weapon charges.

Gameplay for Star Wars: Battlefront is essentially done by equiping a player with a firearm and three Star Card weapons/tools and then going into one of the maps to run around and shoot. The Star Wars: Battlefront platform encompasses two essential styles of play: the base games that are played by a single person (or with shared play with one other person) or multiplayer modes. The modes might be very different, but they boil down to running around and shooting (or flying a starship and shooting).

The Single Player version of Star Wars: Battlefront is fundamentally broken into Battles, Survival, and Skirmishes. Battles are (generally) one player running around fighting against AI adversaries who are simply there trying to kill the player. The AI can provide allies to aid the player who is running around killing enemies. The Battles, which allow for a very limited multiplayer mode in that another person may join the battle for split-screen play as either an ally or enemy of the primary player, have the essential goal of reaching a score of 100 before the enemy team does. The points are achieved by picking up tokens that are left (for a limited time) above the corpse or a killed enemy. The difficult aspect of Battles is that collecting tokens often puts players in mortal peril and the AI allies do not collect tokens for the player; only the player may work to achieve the 100 score, whereas the enemy forces seem to be able to collect tokens at a comparatively accelerated rate.

Survival is a cool concept that is unique to the single-player portion of Star Wars: Battlefront. The primary player (and up to one other, playing in concert with the primary player) is part of a mission to Hoth, Sullust, Endor or Tatooine, when their mission is compromised. Fifteen waves of enemies (some with Imperial vehicles like AT-STs) are set against the player and they have only a handful of lives to attempt to survive the onslaught. For the first two (out of three) levels of difficulty, players are assigned Star Cards to try to use in their survival attempt. As a casual gamer, the Master level of difficulty has proven to be cripplingly difficult for me. Regardless of the map, the forces decimate me whenever I try to play the Survival on Master difficulty, which was very frustrating for me; it has become impossible for me to achieve all of the game's goals as a result.

Skirmish is the latest type of gameplay for the single-player mode of Star Wars: Battlefront. Skirmish is a one-person recreation of the multiplayer modes Walker Assault and Fighter Squadron. Skirmish is a weird rehashing of the two multiplayer modes where the player plays against (and with) virtual enemies and teammates to achieve the goals of destroying AT-ATs or shooting down enemy fighters with a fighter of one's own.

The multiplayer mode is what keeps me interested in Star Wars: Battlefront. The multiplayer mode requires an online subscription (like the Playstation Network) and a decent internet connection in order to play against others worldwide. Players play as part of an eight to twenty person team (depending on the game type) against an opposing team of approximately the same size to achieve an objective specific to the game type. The multiplayer modes for Star Wars: Battlefront include: Blast, Hero Hunt, Heroes Vs. Villains, Fighter Squadron, Walker Assault, Supremacy, Turning Point, Cargo, Drop Zone and Droid Run.

Blast is essentially the same as the single person battles where the whole purpose is to run around as part of a kill or be killed scenario. There is no strategy, just two teams of people running around an environment killing one another and respawning until one team reaches 100 kills first. Blast has no subtlety or strategy to it; it is simply players running around shooting. Fortunately, the game objectively counts the kills, so players do not have to risk their lives to collect tokens to beat the opposing team.

Similar to Blast are Hero Hunt and Heroes Vs. Villains. Heroes Vs. Villains infuses the teams with three to four (depending on the map) heroes or villains (heroes for Rebel players, villains for Imperial players) alongside the standard soldiers and the players run around killing each other. Each three minute round ends when one side manages to kill all of the opposing team's heroes or villains.

Hero Hunt is like the single-player Battles where one person plays a hero (or villain) character and is attacked by all of the other players. Hero Hunt rounds allow players who inflict the most cumulative damage against the hero characters to become the hero themselves and fight for survival. Hero Hunt is the only multiplayer game that has a "mercy rule;" if the hero makes 50 kills, the game ends. Hero hunt has two fundamental glitches. The first is that players who play Hero Hunt for multiple rounds will easily note that DICE chooses the initial hero player in the most problematic possible way. I have played Hero Hunt a ridiculous number of times and the sheer number of times where a player has been selected as the initial hero player in a new round was a player who achieved victory using the mercy rule in the prior round has been insane. If a player can slaughter a whole team of people so that they reach fifty kills first, odds are they are not going to be easily stopped the next round! And often they are not, making for stifling, unpleasant game play. The other glitch that DICE does not seem to ever quite fix is that periodically during Hero Hunt multiple heroes will be in play at the same time. A team of people stands no chance against The Emperor and Bossk (for those who move on to the expansion and experience this glitch!) playing in concert at the same time (as the Emperor has the ability to heal allies and Bossk has decent range for his weapons) or against two Luke Skywalkers!

Fighter Squadron is essentially Blast for starships. Rebel players play as X-Wing or A-Wing fighters (or, with the Hero token, the Millennium Falcon), while Imperial players play as TIE Fighters or TIE Interceptors (or, heroically, as Slave I) and fly around an aerial map shooting each other down. Like Blast, there is no strategy to Fighter Squadron; it is a simple kill or be killed scenario that ends when the game either times out or one side manages to get 400 kills.

Cargo is essentially "capture the flag" where teams have five cargo packs each. Each side attempts to get the cargo backpack from the opponent's base and run it back to their own side. Teams have to effectively guard and retrieve the cargo backpacks. Cargo is wonderful for those players who like playing defensive games, as guarding the cargo can be an essential path to victory.

Droid Run is similar to Cargo in that two six-person teams have to gain and maintain control over three gonk droids that are moving in limited patterns on a given map. Players have to find the gonk droids, run over to them, take control over them and then keep all three of the gonk droids under their influence without the control being broken by the other team! Drop Zone is similar to Droid Run in that escape pods drop periodically on the field of play and each team must try to claim it, much like they have to claim droids. After a set amount of time while the pod is "claimed," the team that claimed it gains its contents. The game is resolved by one team managing to claim five pods first.

My favorite game in the multiplayerStar Wars: Battlefront is Walker Assault, arguably because of my love of AT-ATs from The Empire Strikes Back! Walker Assault places the two teams on a massive field, with one or two AT-ATs in play. Over the course of three rounds, the AT-ATs move to shooting range of a Rebel transport that is poised to escape the planet. Rebels have to activate (and maintain the activation) of beacons that call forth Y-Wing fighters that bomb the hell out of the AT-ATs during each of the three vulnerable periods in the round. The AT-ATs are vulnerable for a limited period of time based on how many Y-Wings are summoned. Imperial forces have to try to take the uplink stations off-line and keep the AT-ATs from being destroyed to win the game. Walker Assault allows imperial players to play as the AT-AT for a minute at a time, which is a wonderful way for those who grew up on the Star Wars franchise to live out the fantasy of decimating Rebel forces as an AT-AT.

Turning Point and Supremacy are very similar games, also on massive maps like Walker Assault. Both games involve the teams having to gain control over specific areas of the map the game is played upon. Supremacy has five points and opens with both teams in control of two control points each, competing for the centralmost control point. When one side asserts dominance over the central control point, they gain momentum and have to fight for control of the first control point for the (now) defensive team. The team that ends up with three control points or takes control of the fifth control point wins.

Turning Point is a similar style, but is one-sided; the Empire starts with three control points and if the Rebels manage to take control of any one of the control points, the Empire is pushed back to a secondary set of control points until they are pushed back to a single, final, control point. Turning Point victors are determined by either the Rebels taking the final control point or the Imperials preventing the final control point (or any of the subsequent levels of control points) from falling to the Rebels.

The diversity of maps, gameplay styles, daily goals and online adversaries makes for an infinite combination of games.

Story

Outside the Survival in the single-player game, there is no narrative to Star Wars: Battlefront. Survival begins and ends with a brief set up of how the player ended up stranded alone in the environment, fighting for their own survival. None of the other games on the Star Wars: Battlefront have any form of story or narrative to them; they are games where Rebels and Imperial forces fight one another to achieve limited goals.

Game Progression

Just as Star Wars: Battlefront lacks a coherent narrative, there is no real progression to the game. Players begin at the same point in each round and the games end at generally solid points (like the destruction of the AT-ATs, timing out as one defends the control points or getting all five of the cargo packs back to base!). While the games do not progress, players are able to level up and get new skins (appearances), firearms and Star Cards. Within each game, players may progress with an armed Trait - like Survivalist, which after a certain number of kills allows the player to heal from wounds at a faster rate.

Effects

The graphics for the Star Wars: Battlefront are incredible. I played Star Wars: Battlefront on the Playstation 4 connected to a Sony Bravia HD (reviewed here!) and it looked and sounded immaculate. The detailing on Star Wars: Battlefront is absolutely incredible. From costuming aspects - there are scratches in the gloss on the Stormtrooper helmets! - to character expressions, Star Wars: Battlefront looks amazing. Players are very easily distracted by running around shooting and preventing themselves from being killed, but DICE clearly worked to make Star Wars: Battlefront look and feel like a real world. I've taken the time to inspect things like random plants on Endor, snowy hills on Hoth, and the lava flows on Sullust and there are no places I have found in Star Wars: Battlefront that do not look truly lifelike!

Characters move with lifelike realism in Star Wars: Battlefront as well. Star Wars: Battlefront occasionally has glitches on the multiplayer mode where characters will repeat motions and I've noticed dramatic functional differences in playability based on how packed the servers appear to be - like opponents moving faster at some points relative to my motions and times when I am playing as the Emperor and set off the Chain Lightning attack but it does not execute, allowing a single opponent to slay me at accelerated speed! But, even when there are glitches or speed execution problems, the characters and environments all look perfect and consistent!

Replayability

Star Wars: Battlefront has amazing replayability based on the fact that each game has different players, different potential weapon and goal combinations and no coherent narrative. This game is exceptionally easy to jump back into at any point, especially for the multiplayer mode.

Overall

Star Wars: Battlefront might have some glitches and some problems with consistency for the execution of how characters manage to move in it, but for the most part, it is a solid game. Star Wars: Battlefront represents the best chance most Star Wars fans have to run around in the most iconic locations from the Star Wars franchise and pretend that they are a part of the action!

Star Wars: Battlefront utilizes settings and characters primarily from:
A New Hope
The Empire Strikes Back
Return Of The Jedi
The Force Awakens

For other game reviews, please be sure to visit my reviews of:
Lego Star Wars: The Complete Saga
Angry Birds Star Wars
Middle Earth: Shadow Of Mordor

8/10

For other video game reviews, please check out my index page on the subject by visiting my Software Review Index Page for an organized listing!

© 2016 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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