Even Better Than The Orange, Blackberry And Cherry Pet Cockroach Gummi Candies From Jelly Belly Are Worth Trying!

Click here to buy a case of Jelly Belly Blackberry And Cherry Pet Cockroach Gummi Candies!
The Good: Tastes like both Blackberry and Cherrys, Presence of Vitamin C, Fun and whimsical.
The Bad: EXPENSIVE!
The Basics: For sure, the Jelly Belly Blackberry and Cherry Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy appeal to a very small niche audience, but I am discovering that I might be in that demographic as I find them more delicious than disturbing!


Up until this week, it has been years since I last had gummy candies. In fact, I recall it very easily: my wife and I were going on a road trip to Las Vegas for the annual Star Trek convention there and we bought bulk gummies before leaving! However, I have since been compelled, through a generous grant of products from the Jelly Belly Candy Company, to try Gummi Candies again. After years without gummies, I tried the Jelly Belly Blackberry And Orange Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy (reviewed here!) and it was good.

So, I more eagerly broke into the new Blackberry and Cherry Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy I had. . . . and it was even better!

The Blackberry and Cherry Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy are expensive, even online where they range from $1.50 - $1.80, but they are otherwise quite wonderful and that makes them very easy to recommend!

Basics

The Blackberry and Cherry Pet Cockroach is a flavor of Jelly Belly Gummi Candies and part of their growing line of bug and creature gummi candies! Jelly Belly Pet Cockroaches are approximately three and a half inches long by two and a half inches wide by 9/10” thick and shaped like a big, Blackberry and Cherry and black cockroach with six legs, two antennae, a head, carapace, and the tiniest little tail coming out the butt! Interestingly, the packages do not try to define the flavor, though online they are marketed as a Blackberry and Cherry/Blackberry Pet Cockroach.

The Blackberry and Cherry Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy from Jelly Bellys are still very new and thus are only available in individual 1.5 oz. packages, or cases of the same. This is represents a single serving and is pretty much how the entire candy industry produces their packs, so (for a change) I have no beef about the packaging. What is alternately cool and really freaky is that each Pet Cockroach comes with a little fact card. The fact card both protects the Pet Cockroach in transit and freaks out the consumer with basic information about the creature the candy is modeled after! The fact card does not appear to change between the flavors of Cockroach.

Ease Of Preparation

These are gummi candies, not trying to train cockroaches to reenact scenes from Constantine! Consuming these is as easy as opening the individual package, sliding the card and Pet Cockroach out and consuming only the candy. There is no additional prep needed.

Taste

The Jelly Belly Blackberry and Cherry Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy smells strongly of sweet cherries. Whatever portion of the Pet Cockroach that is supposed to represent Blackberry to the nose is entirely sublimated to the red cherry legs of the Gummi! Even putting one’s nose right on the purple-black body of the Pet Cockroach (where, presumably, it is flavored like blackberry), the Cherry and Blackberry Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy smells exclusively like cherry.

On the taste front, though, the black/dark purple carapace of the Pet Cockroach tastes like berries, dark and delicious in a way that the legs do not. In fact, as one’s saliva touches the legs, this candy releases a pure, distinct wave of flavor that perfectly embodies sweet cherries! That is in very real contrast to the more mellow, less overtly sweet berry flavor of the blackberry body. The resulting taste of this delicious bug is a sweet treat whose sweetness never becomes overbearing, as it is muted by the flavor of the slightly more sour blackberry portion of the Pet Cockroach. The combination of flavors is actually quite delightful and fruity.

The effect of the contrasting flavors also serves to neutralize both tastes and leave the consumer without any significant aftertaste in the mouth!

Nutrition

Again, these are Gummi candies, not actual cockroaches or fruit, but the Blackberry and Cherry Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy come with 100% of one's RDA of Vitamin C and that makes it a worthwhile alternative to vitamins. Outside that, it behooves one to realized that Gummi Candies, even Jelly Belly Gummi Candies, are not a legitimate source of nutrition. These are a snack food, a dessert, and are in no way an adequate substitute for a real meal. A serving is listed as a single cockroach, with each serving having 130 calories.

Each Jelly Belly Blackberry and Cherry Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy is not as bad as they could be in the nutrition area. They have a negligible amount of fat (from Coconut Oil that is way down the ingredient list) and two whole grams of protein. These are not Vegan compliant because they contain gelatin! However, it is Kosher gelatin, so these do appear to be Kosher! They have only one percent of the daily sodium with 15 mg and they are made in a peanut free factory! The main ingredients are corn syrup, sugar, and Kosher gelatin. These are made in a peanut free factory, as well!

Storage/Clean-up

Jelly Belly Blackberry and Cherry Pet Cockroach Gummi Candies have a shelf life of approximately one year, though mine did not last five minutes after I opened the package! They remain freshest when they are kept in their package and they ought to be kept in a cool environment. Storing them in hot places is likely to make the gummi candy denature. Kept in a cool, dry place, the Blackberry and Cherry Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy seems to retain its flavor well. The Gummi I received last week had an expiration date of June 25, 2013 and, had I not opened it today, I am sure that with proper handling, it would easily have lasted that long.

As for cleanup, unless one allows the Blackberry and Cherry Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy to get hot to the point that it denatures and gets sticky, there should be no cleanup necessary.

Overall

The Blackberry and Cherry Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy might look like a gross bug, but it tastes delicious!

For other Jelly Belly flavors reviewed by me, please check out:
Sunkist Blackberry and Cherry Slices
Beanboozled Jelly Bean Assortment
Dark Chocolate Raspberry Dips Jelly Beans

7.5/10

For other food or drink reviews, please visit my index page on the subject by clicking here!

© 2012 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Bryan Fuller's Inevitable Failure: Pushing Daisies: The Complete First Season

The Good: Moments of acting and general concept
The Bad: Terribly repetitive, Very limited concept, Not terribly funny or dramatic
The Basics: A thoroughly average series hits DVD with an anemic first season that holds up poorly over multiple viewings.


Bryan Fuller is a writer and producer whose work I respect immensely. Fuller was one of the geniuses behind the clever and dark dramedy Dead Like Me and later Wonderfalls (reviewed here!). He has a loyal fan base for good reason: his shows might be short-lived, but they tend to be clever, character-intensive and have something impressive to say about the human condition. So, if anything, I was eagerly awaiting Pushing Daisies when it debuted as part of the troubled 2007-2008 television series.

By the time the Complete First Season of Pushing Daisies debuted with its nine episodes on DVD, I was already tuned out. Having given it a chance again on DVD, I renew my apathy toward the series and for a while I felt bad about that. Now, I'm mostly just bored and largely it is because series creator Bryan Fuller has created a series that has such limited potential that it was largely doomed from its first episode. Indeed, when I watched the pilot with a friend, when it was over, she just shrugged and said, "Yeah, how long can they keep that up?!" And she was right; by the end of the first season, the strain in the concept has already been stretched well beyond capacity.

Ned is a decent guy who lives as a pie maker baking pies and fending off the advances of his neighbor and coworker, Olive Snook when the love of his life - his childhood neighbor - Chuck (Charlotte, actually) is murdered. As a private detective named Emerson Cod investigates Chuck's murder, Ned gets access to the body and reveals a skill he possesses: he can resurrect the dead with a single touch. Unfortunately, reviving the dead in this fashion comes with two consequences: he must put the dead to rest with a second touch within a minute or someone nearby will die and if the person he resurrects is kept undead, he may never touch them again or else they will die.

Thus, Ned resurrects Chuck and quickly finds that she shares his feelings for her, but given that he cannot touch her, things become complicated. Also complicating their budding relationship is Olive, who wants Ned for her own and Chuck's aunts, Vivian and Lily, who she misses dearly. Soon, though, Emerson sees the benefit to Ned's gift in his business as a p.i. and he enlists Ned to aid him on high-profile cases with fantastic rewards. Soon, the gang is balancing pie making with detective work in a somewhat ridiculous romance where a man has a second chance at love, provided he never touches the woman he adores.

The nine episodes of the first season of Pushing Daisies tend to be rather formulaic with Emerson getting a case that Ned's ability has the potential to make much easier and solvable. Ned is enlisted, the pair discovers that things are actually more complicated and with Chuck and/or Olive "assisting" the case gets solved. Cases include such things as an environmentally beneficial car that seems to be using corpses as crash test dummies, the murder of jockeys - with Olive being a potential target -, and a novelist whose scratch-and-sniff book blows up in his face. There are some twists and turns, like a dog breeder who has four wives and a candy store that opens up to threaten the business at the Pie Hole, but largely, these are fairly common and unsurprising murder mysteries for those who are fans of the genre.

Unfortunately, the concept is rather quickly realized. Ned can take Chuck with him in his car, provided they are separated by a significant barrier (in this case, a plexiglass wall he has installed between the driver's side and passenger side). Ned can hide Chuck in his apartment and they can lay near one another, provided they have enough barriers between them. They can even kiss, so long as there is plastic wrap keeping their lips apart. The only real complication of interest is that soon Ned discovers that for some reason Olive is immune to his death/life touch . . .

Unlike most of Fuller's works, Pushing Daisies is more gimmick and plot oriented than actually character-driven. In Dead Like Me, the Reapers had limitations and taking souls was a conscious act, preventing exactly the type of mishaps that occur in this series. Similarly, Jaye in Wonderfalls might be plagued with prophetic abilities, but the underlying question that caused the series to move - "what if divine forced were truly talking to someone in modern times?" - gave Jaye and the writers of the series virtually limitless options to explore. In Pushing Daisies, the limitations are all concept-based and playing it out offers very finite options and ultimately, the series must create a story that is always mired in frustration or defy its own tenants. Indeed, given that the series is billed as a dramedy, odds are it will not surprise the viewer by turning devastatingly tragic by having Ned accidentally re-kill Chuck. So, instead, the characters plod along somewhat formulaically.

In the first season, the principle characters are:

Ned - The pie maker, he has a secret which involves the way he first discovered his ability and inadvertently killed Chuck's father. Having gotten a chance to spend his life with his childhood love, Ned takes the chance and he now surrounds himself with a woman and a dog whom he can never touch. He resists his neighbor's advances and clear interest in him and allows himself to be impressed into Emerson's service as a detective where he uses his ability to resurrect the dead to find out clues to murders,

Emerson - A private detective who quickly determines that Ned might be his key to an early and happy retirement, he opts to keep Ned and Chuck's secret in order to solve cases and make himself wealthy. Soon, though, he develops a genuine affection for Ned,

Chuck - Finding herself resurrected after more or less figuring out she was killed, she misses her guardians who raised her. She and Ned reconnect quickly and she refuses to be kept hidden as his plaything and she joins Emerson and Ned on many cases to keep herself busy and happy,

Olive - Ned's neighbor and employee at the Pie Hole, she has an obvious love of Ned. She is a former jockey and is known to break out into song while baking. She quickly becomes both jealous of Chuck and more curious about Ned,

and Vivian and Lily - Chuck's eccentric, shut-in aunts who were part of a mermaid act until one lost an eye. They take Chuck's death hard.

Pushing Daisies is further hampered by a narrator who provides voice-overs on every episode and that's just annoying. The stories are largely clear enough that the viewer can understand what is going on without being told what we are already seeing on screen. Fuller and his creative team take a pretty obvious concept and then spend time each episode explaining it more and it is insulting to the viewers.

Given that there are no great leaps of character, the best Pushing Daisies can hope for in most episodes is that the actors will do their best with the material they are given. Kristen Chenowith plays Olive with the same enthusiasm and perkiness she seems to have in every role and the addition of her musical talents (something she was diversifying into professionally between her time on The West Wing and the premiere of this series) seems more like an actor choice than an actual necessity to making the character or show work.

Similarly, Lee Pace plays Ned much the same way he played his character on Wonderfalls. He's good, but the performance is nothing extraordinary or different. Pace plays good guy well but this role uses the talents we have already seen him portray. In fact, on the acting front, it is Chi McBride who is most impressive for going a different place than one has seen from the actor before. McBride plays Emerson and he does it with a stiffness that is very different from his portrayal of principal Steven Harper on Boston Public or his businessman on the first season of House, M.D.

Ultimately, though, Pushing Daisies is a limited concept show that is played out well before the end of the second episode. As I write this, the second season of Pushing Daisies is on-the-bubble for cancellation and for those who are thinking of picking this set up, I'd advise patience: odds are, a "Complete Series" boxed set will be available sooner as opposed to later.

For other works featuring Kristen Chenowith, please check out my reviews of:
The Pink Panther
Stranger Than Fiction
The West Wing - Season 6
The West Wing - Season 7
Four Christmases

5/10

For other television reviews, please be sure to visit my Television Review Index Page for an organized listing!

© 2012, 2008 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Sour, Gross, Then Saccharin, Wrigley’s Juicy Fruit Lip Balm Is Impossible To Recommend!

The Good: Easy to apply, Does not leave color residue, Offers basic protection!
The Bad: Offers very limited protection, Potential to melt, Relatively pricey, Waxy feel from residue, Tastes disgusting.
The Basics: While there might be an instant where this lip balm tastes like actual Wrigley’s Juicy Fruit gum, the Lotta Luv lip balm that bears its name is just gross!


My wife is very cool in many ways. One of them is that she tries to keep things fresh and fun between us by trying quite a few different flavored lip balms. Okay, truth be told, she takes amazingly good care of her lips whether I am around or not, so I only flatter myself to think she does it for me! Sometimes, she gets some of the trendy, fun, flavored lip balms based off of popular candies, like the Extreme Pink Lemonade Blowpop lip balm (reviewed here!). While many of them have been hits or average by my standards, every once in a while, she pulls out one that is worthy of a rightful, swift, panning. The Wrigley’s Juicy Fruit flavor lip balm falls firmly into that category.

Wrigley’s Juicy Fruit flavor lip balm comes in the standard .15 oz. tube. It is a discreet plastic tube measuring two and a half inches long by 3/8" in diameter. The lip balm it dispensed by simply removing the bright yellow cap (it pulls off easily enough) and twisting a dial on the bottom to push the remaining product up. The lip balm itself is a waxy muted yellow colored tube that is rubbed onto the lips and it offers a physical barrier to water and other damaging elements that could crack lips in winter and sunlight which could damage lips in the summer (or winter, whatwith the brightness of sunglare on snow). The product does not leave any coloring on one's lips, which is a plus. However, it does leave the sensation of the barrier that it is and the waxy feel is a definite downside.

The sunscreen properties of this Wrigley’s Juicy Fruit lip balm are more alleged than actual; I found no SPF rating on the container. Still, the lip balm actually adhered well to my lips, which cannot be said for all lip balms. And it is adequate protection when I take Myah out to the beach first thing in the morning. I have not risked having only this lip balm when it gets very sunny out; I can feel my lips drying out when that happens. Perhaps even more important, Wrigley’s Juicy Fruit lip balm only seems to combat limited amounts of cold and chapping in the winter. Tested in the rough Upstate New York winters, this lip balm does not adequately protect against chapped lips, as the physical barrier that helps to retain moisture within the lips quickly wears off.

On the flip side, this product is remarkably easy to apply. It glides on easy and creates a barrier needed to resist some of the elements. Unfortunately, in this regard comes one of the other biggest drawbacks to the product. This lip balm has a very waxy feel to it. When it is on my lips, I am very aware of its presence. Of all of the lip balms for lips that I have tried since I started kissing anyone again, this is the most waxy feeling, even more so than basic or medicated Chapstick products. It goes on feeling waxy and it feels waxy when it is on. As a result, it is easy to feel when this product has been wiped or worn thoroughly off one's lips as well.

Wrigley’s Juicy Fruit leaves no significant color on the lips when it is applied. It may feel omnipresent and thick when it is on, but it does not look yellow on one's lips (fortunately!).

On the taste front, this is just plain gross. The Wrigley’s Juicy Fruit lip balm has a strong scent of rotting peaches and bananas to it and it tastes absolutely vile. Starting with a surprisingly sour and generically fruity flavor, the lip balm rapidly transitions to a saccharin flavor. It is important to note: that’s nto saccharin-sweet, it’s just saccharin. It becomes overbearingly sweet and then dry, with a distinctly chemical taste to it. This is gross and it made me wish it were off my lips and not touching my tongue pretty much the entire time I used this!

The Wrigley’s Juicy Fruit lip balm has ingredients on the tube, so be sure to check the package before purchasing for any allergies you might have. But the primary ingredients are: oleyl alcohol, petrolatum and microcrystaline wax. This is not at all more tasty than it sounds! It is noted that it is not intended for human consumption, so don't look to this for nutrition!

It is also worth noting that this semi-expensive little lip balm is not designed for moisturizing, only protecting. As a result, while it might prevent lips from drying out or cracking a little bit in winter and summer, it will not repair damaged, cracked skin on the lips. This is a stopgap product; it prevents some damage, but will not moisturize already dried lips or heal damaged, cracked lips.

For me, the vile taste was too much and, despite the limited protection this product offers, I could not recommend the Wrigley’s Juicy Fruit lip balm!

For other lip care products, please check out my reviews of:
Strawberry Chapstick
Tootsie Roll Lip Balm
Burt's Bees Medicated Lip Balm

3.5/10

For other health and beauty products, please visit my index page by clicking here!

© 2012 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Disappointing, But Still Enough Good To Recommend, I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry.

The Good: Moments of humor, Ultimately a pro-tolerance stance, Moments of acting, DVD bonus features
The Bad: Pulls punches, Pacing, Predictable plot
The Basics: Funny, but hardly a timeless comedy, I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry has a basic premise and ultimately promotes tolerance of gay and lesbian civil rights.


Lately, I have found myself watching a lot of movies to keep my partner happy, though I am generally glad to do that. The other day, she had a rough day at work - she works at a pet store and a puppy had to be put down because another worker administered the dog a pill, which ended up in the animal's lung! - and she wanted a movie to take her mind off her day. So, we went to our library and I let her pick out a film. The one we ended up watching was I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry and it served its purpose, to distract her from what was going on.

The problem with I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry is that once one hears the title, they pretty much get the entire concept of the movie and the execution of that concept offers few surprises or laughs. The movie is entirely predictable, is unimpressive in terms of scope or even the delivery of its message. For those looking for a pro-gay rights film, the comedy makes jokes that are often too awkward to be considered truly open minded and the movie takes no real risks in terms of storytelling. In many ways, it becomes a very typical Adam Sandler film.

Chuck and Larry are New York City firefighters who are best friends. They wisecrack as they put out fires and perform rescues and their lives seem generally content. Chuck is a womanizer who is happily promiscuous and untied to any one woman, while Larry is a widower raising two children. When Chuck nearly plummets to his death during an investigation of a burnt-out building, he is rescued by Larry. Larry, in the process, comes to realize that his children are not protected by his benefits package, which still names his dead wife as the beneficiary. Because of an administrative error, the benefits cannot be transferred unless Larry gets married.

Larry, then, decides to call in Chuck's promise of doing anything for his friend in gratitude for being saved by him; he asks Chuck to be his domestic partner so his if he dies, Chuck could take care of his kids. After a patent reluctance, Chuck agrees. Soon after they become domestic partners, a special investigator - Clint Fitzer - is dispatched to look into the partnership, alleging fraud. Chuck moves in with Larry, their boss finds out about the partnership and subsequent marriage and soon all of the firehouse is disturbed by Chuck and Larry being "out." As the two men work to save themselves from jail, Chuck finds himself attracted to their lawyer, Alex, who is eager to defend the two men and their right to their marriage.

I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry is a pretty standard Adam Sandler vehicle, including appearances by Sandler's Saturday Night Live alums Rob Schneider - in an utterly insulting role as the Asian priest who marries Chuck and Larry in Canada - and David Spade. This means that Adam Sandler plays yet another generally mild-mannered guy who speaks abrasively with a sense of innocence about him. Sandler as the womanizing Chuck has little real difference from his character in Mr. Deeds (reviewed here!), save that Chuck is smarter. As is his (apparent) trademark, there is also the requisite scene of extreme violence where Sandler beats the crap out of someone with a supposedly comedic flair. Sandler's characters almost always have an angry outburst and Chuck is no exception. This is disturbing more for what the screenwriters are apparently saying about women - virtually everyone who looks at Chuck and Larry as a couple suspects Chuck takes a traditionally feminine role in their relationship - than it does about gays.

Kevin James plays Larry and this might be the first role I've actually seen James play that is a major film role. He seems pretty much like he appears in the few clips of King Of Queens I've caught which suggests that his presence as a good, generally happy guy is the result of good casting as opposed to any form of inspired acting. The problem here is that Larry has moments when he has a melancholy that James seems unable to play. He does not carry the emotional resonance of a man pining for his wife who has been dead for two years. Instead, he slouches through the role alternating the comedic and dramatic moments with little differentiation in his performance.

Supporting roles by Jessica Biel, Ving Rhames and Dan Aykroyd all outshine Sandler and certainly James. Biel plays the lawyer, Alex, and while she and Sandler might have only minimal on-screen chemistry, she plays the role with an earnest innocence that makes her part funny and believable. She plays Alex as educated in her field, but somewhat ignorant outside it, which works. Similarly, Aykroyd's supporting role has him as a believable gruff leader and he pulls the part off quite well.

I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry is alternately funny and offensive and this is a movie where it largely gets away with its gay jokes because Chuck's use of an anti-gay slur change by the end of the movie. As well, the ultimate message of the film is one of tolerance, that homosexuality ought not to be a limiting factor to one's quality of life or experiences and as a result, there is still some social value to the movie.

Realistically, that value is somewhat limited and there are much better movies about actual gay or lesbian love, like The Incredibly True Adventure Of Two Girls In Love whereas this explores a legal loophole in domestic partnership law which few gay and lesbian activists care about (i.e. we'd rather have domestic partnership and actual marriage laws that heterosexual couples might abuse as opposed to being denied them entirely). The plot is entirely predictable, as are the character arcs. Because the "rightness" of freedom and the rights of all people to be married and be happy are so strong, the viewer knows that Chuck and Larry will not get away with their deception (it's that kind of movie where an absolute right must be preserved for any suspension of disbelief to be maintained). As well, because Chuck is a womanizer, the viewer pretty much figures that he will grow by the end and lo and behold, he does.

The DVD presentation of I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry includes about ten minutes of deleted scenes, one of which answers the question of how a guy like Chuck manages to go so long without having sex with a woman once he is married to Larry. There is a commentary track and a featurette and these are pretty much standard for a comedy of this type. They are not bad, but they are hardly exceptional.

But that is pretty much how best to define I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry; it is remarkably average, but not superlative in any way.

For other works with Nick Swardson, please be sure to visit my reviews of:
Jack And Jill
30 Minutes Or Less
Just Go With It
Bolt

6/10

For other movie reviews, be sure to visit my Movie Review Index Page for an organized listing of all the films I have reviewed!

© 2012, 2009 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Man On A Ledge Might Be Simple, But It Is Engaging!

The Good: Decent story, Good acting
The Bad: Light on character development, Light on DVD bonus features
The Basics: Man On A Ledge is an improbable thriller that has more to it than the trailers revealed!


Every once in a while, I enjoy a real “flight of fantasy” movie. I’m not talking about the type of movie that happens in a mythical setting or involves creatures that do not exist in real life. No, I’m talking about a movie set in the very real world where events progress in an entirely unrealistic way to give us a moment’s escape from the cold, harsh reality of our world. Last night, I discovered that with Man On A Ledge.

Man On A Ledge was a movie I actually actively avoided when it was in the theaters. The previews seemed far too revealing to me (and, objectively, they show far too much of the movie to have left me actually surprised at any point in Man On A Ledge) and that sort of preview is a real pet peeve of mine. So, when I could watch it more casually now that it is out on DVD, I took the opportunity to watch Man On A Ledge and I was pleasantly surprised. Man On A Ledge has a little bit more going on than the trailers let on and despite the utterly fantastic nature of the chain of events, Man On A Ledge is actually an enjoyable, diverting film.

After having his last meal at a hotel in New York City, Nick Cassidy steps out onto a ledge. Moments later, police arrive and he has a single request for them, bring negotiator Lydia Mercer or he will jump. Mercer comes and begins to talk Cassidy down, while he withholds from her who he actually is. A month prior, Nick Cassidy was in prison and his final appeal was denied, so his twenty-five year sentence is going to be upheld. When his father dies, he is granted a furlough to attend the funeral and there he steals the gun from the guard and escapes.

Now, as Nick Cassidy stands out on the hotel ledge, he is acting as a distraction for his brother Joey and Joey’s girlfriend, Angie. Joey and Angie are breaking into the diamond exchange owned by David Englander across the street. Englander, Mercer learns when she identifies Nick, is the man who got Nick locked away, supposedly for stealing a massive diamond, chopping it up and selling it off. As Nick tries to keep the media focus on him, he pleads with Mercer to believe his story, a story that reveals a web of corrupt cops working as Englander’s private security. With Englander and his police closing in on Nick and his team, Mercer follows the clues to learn the truth about Nick’s conviction and Englander’s machinations.

Man On A Ledge is very plot-focused. This is a thriller that focuses very closely on a chain of events, delivering facts as necessary to create a very plot-driven story. Nick Cassidy does not grow or change or develop over the course of the story and Lydia Mercer does not really develop either. Instead, this is intended as a gritty reality-type situation where Nick uses the last tools he has to try to expose David Englander’s deceptions. The film hinges a lot on characters who share a lot of information about events that the viewer is never privy to. In other words, many of the characters are actually motivated by Internal Affairs investigations over events not at all related to Nick Cassidy being on the ledge. And they come up as is convenient.

Given the lack of character development, almost the entire film is about plot; what is happening now, why is it happening, where is the movie going . . . Man On A Ledge does not try to be something deep and smart or clever outside itself. This is a film that is trying simply to tell a story and it is engaging. Well before the end, the viewer becomes invested in Nick Cassidy. Early on in the film it is established that there are really only two ways that Man On A Ledge can end: he comes in voluntarily or he does not. Whether or not Nick Cassidy lives or dies truly becomes interesting to the viewer because of the extreme efforts so many people are going through to save his life. Long before Man On A Ledge ends, the viewer wants to know which way it will go.

I attribute the success of Man On A Ledge to the cast. Sam Worthington is good as Nick Cassidy, easily playing a plausible convict. He has enough screen presence to make it obvious almost from the first moment he steps out onto the ledge that he is not distraught and not actually intending to jump. Sure, the previews all ruined that aspect of the movie, but Worthington sells it now that there is no hype for the movie. Anthony Mackie plays off Worthington very well and it seems entirely plausible in the ease of their performances that their characters could have been partners in the past.

Man On A Ledge might tip its hand by casting the always-amazing William Sadler to the apparently minor role of the valet, but it makes up for it with the perfect casting of Edward Burns, Ed Harris and Titus Welliver. Elizabeth Banks is fine as Lydia Mercer, but having just watched her by going through all of the bonus features on Zack And Miri Make A Porno (reviewed here), it seems like director Asger Leth cast her for the role, but didn’t make her stretch in any way. Banks is good, Mercer is not one of her more memorable roles and it is not at all an unfamiliar performance from her. In other words, she is well-cast, but not acting excessively well in Man On A Ledge.

Ironically, then, it is Elizabeth Banks who delivers the only decent DVD bonus feature on Man On A Ledge. Man On A Ledge comes with exceptionally few bonus features. After a single preview, the main menu comes up and there is a featurette (“The Ledge”) and a second feature where Elizabeth Banks provides commentary for the theatrical trailer to Man On A Ledge. Her commentary consists mostly of gushing over Sam Worthington’s body and admitting that she would tap Ed Harris, with jokes about Genesis Roderiguez not wearing much. She is very funny and she takes the somewhat ridiculous assignment for what it is and delivers an entertaining two minutes that does not quite justify the expense of the DVD.

Ultimately, Man On A Ledge is diverting and worth watching, even if it is not in any fashion, enduringly great.

For other works featuring Sam Worthington, check out my reviews of:
Wrath Of The Titans
Clash Of The Titans
Avatar
Terminator: Salvation

7/10

For other film reviews, be sure to check out my Movie Review Index Page for an organized listing of all my movie reviews!

© 2012 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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One Of The Last Brannon Braga Outings Worth Watching Is Star Trek: Voyager's "Projections!"

The Good: Great acting, Interesting concept, Good character resolution, Good effects
The Bad: Very familiar plot structure
The Basics: When the Doctor experiences serious malfunctions, a holographic Reginald Barclay appears to explain the nature of the universe to him in a solid Star Trek: Voyager episode.


For those who follow my reviews, it's well known that I despise the works of Brannon Braga, writer, producer, one-trick pony. Braga is the mastermind behind some of the best episodes of Star Trek: The Next Generation, like "Frame Of Mind" (reviewed here!), "Parallels" (reviewed here!), and the series finale "All Good Things . . ." (reviewed here!). He spent the rest of his Star Trek career gutting the franchise on Star Trek: Voyager and later Enterprise where he retold his best works in the context of new series's. The last time he hit gold as a writer was in Star Trek: Voyager. The first of his last decent episodes is "Projections."

The U.S.S. Voyager has been seriously damaged and the Emergency Medical Hologram is activated and transferred to the bridge of the ship to treat Janeway, who is critically wounded there. It soon becomes clear that the situation is not real; Voyager appears to be a holographic reconstruction. A holographic representation of Reginald Barclay appears and informs the Doctor that they are running tests on a space station and all of what the Doctor thinks he knows is a fabrication. As proof, Barclay restarts the system with the first activation of the Doctor. Soon, the Doctor finds himself in a battle for control of reality as it appears he is merely a holographic representation of a man dying of radiation poisoning.

This is basically a Star Trek: Voyager recreation of the Star Trek: The Next Generation episode "Frame Of Mind" and it involves almost all of the same twists and turns over the nature of reality. Like that superior episode, "Projections" works to establish an alternate reality that will severely threaten the viewer's sense of what the established order of the show's universe is. Over the course of the hour episode, it will attempt to dupe the viewer into believing a potential delusion of the character and ask the viewer to accept that there is a whole other reality to be explored.

We are not so easily duped. Is it fun to watch the Doctor run around as if he is alive and part of a simulation back on Jupiter Station? Sure. Is it wild to watch the scenes from "Caretaker" where the Doctor was first activated replay? Absolutely. Does the viewer believe that the prior eighteen episodes were unreal and that if this episode is resolved according to this plot, the show will take a radically different turn beginning with the next episode? Not for a second. The weakness of "Projections" is that its plot is so ambitious and fanciful that the viewer is unable to suspend their disbelief.

To wit, the difference between "Frame Of Mind" and "Projections" is the scope. In the Star Trek: The Next Generation episode, the viewer is asked to believe that Riker may be trapped in an insane asylum on a planet where he was lost on a mission and possibly killed people. It works. In "Projections," the viewer is asked to believe that the entire series up until this point has been a lie. Please! As the saying goes, I was born, but I wasn't born yesterday. In order for "Projections" to sell itself, it has to make it plausible that the entire series before now has been a lie and that when the problem with the simulation that the Doctor is supposedly involved in is fixed, Voyager itself will disappear. So, while the viewer may well be entertained, it's impossible for a reasonable viewer to buy this premise. It's too much for an educated viewer to buy into.

That said, that's the only real problem. For those who have not seen "Frame Of Mind," "Projections" is perfectly entertaining. Add to that, if one has not seen any other episodes of Star Trek: Voyager, this becomes even more entertaining. After all, this could be the end for those who don't know better!

"Projections" marks the first appearance of Reginald Barclay, even if only in holographic form. Braga wrote the earlier Barclay episode in Star Trek: The Next Generation, "Realm Of Fear" (reviewed here!), so Barclay sounds like what we expect of him. Dwight Schultz reprises his role of Barclay in this episode. He does fine. If that's not the most ringing endorsement, it's hard to give more; Schultz has played the role before and this one is the same as his other appearances. Moreover, because it is only a holographic representation of Barclay and he serves mostly to exposit plot, there is little in the way of character development. Barclay in "Projections" serves as a plot device to enable the plot and explain it. In that function, the character works.

Beyond that, actor Dwight Schultz plays off Robert Picardo expertly. Picardo, who plays the EMH, has a wonderful sense of comic timing and here he uses that to time over-the-top mood variations as the Doctor's reality is shaken. Forced for the first time to emote things like experiencing pain, Picardo is a great study and he brings his full body to the role. Schultz acts something like a straightman to Picardo's wildly physical role, keeping his own body language minimal and understated.

Moreover, it is Schultz who is burdened with most of the technobabble and he works it out fine.

With all of the mind-bending movies in the mainstream in the last few years that have done well and engaged the general public, "Projections" ought to be accessible to any audience. Certainly, it's geared toward those who like science fiction and Star Trek, but anyone who is open to a reality-bending drama ought to enjoy this episode. Much of the episode is about the Doctor simply figuring out if reality truly is his life aboard the U.S.S. Voyager or if that life is simply part of a holographic test being done on a station within Earth's solar system. As he begins to test both ideas, the EMH finds himself in increasing amounts of trouble with discerning the differences between reality and fantasy.

The audience may know, but on nights when we're willing to suspend our disbelief just enough, "Projections" becomes entertaining to watch, because clearly the Doctor does not know which way the whole experience will go.

As a footnote, one of the cooler ideas in "Projections" has to be the idea that the Doctor might simply be a manifestation of a biological being who is in the process of dying. Braga plays familiar cards, but in a way that he makes us feel like the idea is new this time around. That's good enough.

[Knowing that VHS is essentially a dead medium, it's worth looking into Star Trek: Voyager - The Complete Second Season on DVD, which is also a better economical choice than buying the VHS. Read my review of the sophomore season here!
Thanks!]

8.5/10

For other Star Trek franchise reviews, be sure to check out my specialized Star Trek Review Index Page!

© 2012, 2007 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Cute And Well-made, The 10” Plush Koopa Troopa Will Please Super Mario Bros. Fans!

The Good: Cute, Well-made, Can be affordable
The Bad: Doesn't so much DO anything, Begs for other Super Mario Plushes!
The Basics: The Koopa Troopa from Super Mario Brothers is imported as a 10” plush in a crawling stance and is actually a pretty cool stuffed “animal.”


Back when I worked for a comic book shop (was that really only a year and a month ago?!), I was pretty happy. I was actually becoming the comic book geek I grudgingly admit that I am now, having been a lifelong science fiction geek. My wife, however, has some tendencies of the video game nerds and I love her for that. In trying to get her some swag that she might like, the day that the boss at the comic book shop I managed got in a huge bunch of boxes of Super Mario plush toys, I let her know. The next day, she came to work with me to hang out for the day and she fell, almost immediately, in love with the plush Koopa Troopa!

Basics

Banpresto in China is the company that makes plush characters based upon the Super Mario Brothers video gamesThe tags are all in Chinese, save the Super Mario logo, the name Banpresto, the website address, and the line “licensed by Nintendo.” These stuffed toys are designed to look cute and embody the characters from the popular video game franchise and they live up to that remarkably well. The Koopa Troopa, in fact, comes in several different varieties, from the upright running one to the crawling one. The one I got for my wife is the crawling one, which makes sense because in the game players jump on top of the back of the Koopa Troopa as it waddles around on all fours!

The stuffed toy is 9 1/2” long by 6” wide and 5” high. It is basically a bright yellow turtle with comically large eyes and a smooth green shell. While four feet, tail, head and underside are all plush, the shell is a smooth vinyl with a pattern reminiscent of a soccer ball.

The eyes on the Koopa Troopa are embroidered, as are the nostrils, so this is actually, a very durable little plush! For those who actually want to make Super Mario scenes, the underside of the Koopa Troopa is well-detailed with the lines on the belly stitched right in!

The Koopa Troopa’s materials are also listed in Chinese and the website for the plush toys is in Japanese, so I cannot evaluate that.

Accessories

The Koopa Troopa is probably considered by everyone but my wife to be an accessory of its own, as opposed to a primary plush. It comes with no accessories, but it does have a glossy hard cardboard tag attached to its soft tag on the actual Koopa Troopa. It comes with no other accessories.

Playability

The Koopa Troopa is fun, but it does not actually do anything. This is a plush that stands stably on all fours and makes a cute pounding sound when it is punched on its shell (this is basically just the sound of flesh on vinyl). Beyond that, it is not an especially playable toy.

Collectibility

I can only suspect that the importers for Banpresto are either scamming eBay or are seriously using sweatshop labor in making their Super Mario toys. When the boss at the comic shop bought the Koopa Troopa and other Super Mario plushes, he was able to get lots of them for less than $10/lot (lots being anywhere from two to seven plush toys per lot!) plus shipping. The importers refused to combine shipping, which was the dramatic expense of these toys (though it did not cost nearly that much to ship). As a result, these plush toys seem to have some of the most varied prices in the business, anywhere from $10 - $40/ea.! It is hard to guess what will happen to the market on these when Banpresto stops producing them, but right now they are hot and they show no signs of deflating in value at the very least.

Overview

The Koopa Troopa plush can be exceptionally cool if you find it inexpensively enough, which is a very real possibility. Because there is so little cool Super Mario merchandise in the United States, this is bound to appeal to most fans of the franchise who are looking for swag from their favorite video game.

For other plush toys, check out my reviews of:
The Worm From Labyrinth Plush
Platte River Trading Mexican Free-tail Bat Plush
Giant Microbes Bad Breath

7.5/10

For other toy reviews, please visit my index page by clicking here!

© 2012 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Heresy! The Book Of Secrets Is Hardly A Masterpiece (It Sounds Like Loreena McKennitt's Other Albums!)

The Good: Good voice, Musically interesting, Some decent musical poems.
The Bad: Could have been a little longer, Musically derivative within album, Vocals obscure lyrics.
The Basics: Loreena McKennitt's The Book Of Secrets is a decent Celtic pop album, but its musical repetitive quality is somewhat stifling to those listening to it over and over again.


Before the lynch mob of Loreena McKennitt fans I have been duly warned about begins to swarm, despite my title, I am recommending the album The Book Of Secrets, which is largely regarded by fans of Loreena McKennitt to be one of her best works and to the best of my knowledge is her greatest commercial success. And at the end of the day, I enjoy the music of Loreena McKennitt, but when one looks at many of her albums, they suffer from her own production as she produces the instrumentals over her vocals and her vocal stylings obscure her lyrics. On The Book Of Secrets, an album I have enjoyed for years, this problem, as well as reusing her own tunes on the same album, make it objectively less great than it initially appears.

That said, it's a wonderful album for those who want a modern Celtic album and those who enjoyed the song "The Mummer's Dance," which is on this album, are bound to be satisfied with this album. And it sounds good. If one is a passive listener to music, then The Book Of Secrets might well appear as a magnum opus for McKennitt. But careful listeners and anyone who actually wants to listen to lyrics to the songs they are hearing will likely be less overwhelmed as we struggle to listen to lyrics that are good, but not exceptional.

With only eight tracks, The Book Of Secrets is filled with only 53:17 minutes of Loreena McKennitt's music. Moreover, it is hard not to argue that McKennitt is creative, she inarguably is. McKennitt wrote the music for all of the songs and the lyrics to four of the five other songs that actually have lyrics. For the fifth, McKennitt set most of Alfred Noyes' poem "The Highwayman" to her new Celtic music and it works. McKennitt sings all five songs that have lines to be sung and sings such inarticulate things as the "la la la"s on "Prologue."

As well, McKennitt is instrumentally gifted. She plays at least one instrument on each and every track. She plays keyboards on all of the songs, as well as piano, harp, Kanoun, and accordion. Moreover, her arrangements are musically rich, so it is hard to say she does not have an way of filling her songs up with a real sense of sound and movement. She has a wonderful ear for creating songs that have a musical depth to them. The Book Of Secrets is produced by Loreena McKennitt, so this is her musical vision as well.

The overall sound is a popular mix of beats and classic instruments. McKennitt produces a new Celtic sound, blending classic instruments like the harp and the accordion with modern instruments like the electric guitar and synthesizer to create a pop-Celt sound. If the ancient Celts were brought into our time to make popular music, this is exactly what they might produce. And for those who have been stuck in the banalities of pop-rock music - especially the last few years as it crosses over into pop-hip hop music - albums like The Book Of Secrets offer a real alternative. The instrumentals are interesting and diverse and the high, feminine voice of Loreena McKennitt is a beautiful and different one.

The problem that I have with McKennitt on this and some of her other early works is that the way she produces the albums makes it very difficult to understand what she is singing. She has a beautiful voice, but she seldom articulates her lines and even when she does, she often pits her lines against instrumentals that are occupying a similar range and pitch, which makes the two frequently indistinguishable from one another.

Take, for example, McKennitt's hit song "The Mummer's Dance." On that song, in the refrain, she takes to soaring up the scale into Mariah Carey and bat territory right as she gives the instruments a crescendo. Is it any wonder, one is unlikely to hear her poem "Who will go down to those shady groves / And summon the shadows there / And tie a ribbon on those sheltering arms / In the springtime of the year / The songs of birds seem to fill the wood / That when the fiddler plays / All their voices can be heard / Long past their woodland days ("The Mummer's Dance") without consulting the liner notes for the lyrics?

And McKennitt is an able poet. "The Highwayman" is a great poem and including it on The Book Of Secrets leaves McKennitt with some big shoes to fill. Still, she manages to rise to the occasion by creating poems that have a similar sense of cadence and depth. McKennitt is able to create a truly classical sound with her lines like "Take me with you on this journey / Where the boundaries of time are now tossed / In cathedrals of the forest / In the words of the tongues now lost / Find the answers, ask the questions / Find the roots of an ancient tree / Take me dancing, take me singing / I'll ride on 'til the moon meets the sea / Ride on through the night, ride on" ("Night Ride Across The Caucaus"). McKennitt is good and she can write, making it unfortunate that so few of the lyrics on The Book Of Secrets are hers (or rather that so few of the songs have lyrics). McKennitt has a great sense of imagery and listening to this album is to transform one's sense of time and place.

However, for those looking for something Celtic in the strictest sense, McKennitt's lines on The Book Of Secrets might leave one somewhat unsatisfied. Some of the songs have pretty obvious Christian undertones and, strictly speaking, the ancient Celts were not Christian. As a result, those looking for a truly Celtic experience might find some of the poetics do not match their sense of philosophy. For example, it is hard to argue the sense of Christian imagery and implication - versus the Celtic one - is not present in McKennitt's lines "I did not believe because I could not see / Though you came to me in the night / When the dawn seemed forever lost / You showed me your love in the light of the stars / Cast your eyes on the ocean / Cast your soul to the sea / When the dark night seems endless / Please remember me" ("Dante's Prayer"). And that's fine, so long as one is not looking for authentic Celtic.

Musically, though, Loreena McKennitt leaves a little to be desired on The Book Of Secrets. On this album, she is unfortunately stealing from herself. "Prologue" and "Night Ride Across The Caucasus" have many of the same chords and progressions. Similarly, the middle of that latter track has a lot of the same instrumentation used in the same way as McKennitt does with her popular "The Mummer's Dance." As a result, listening to The Book Of Secrets over and over again, the listener might find they are a little dulled by the sound.

The album is a good one, but it is not exceptional. The best song is "The Highwayman," the low point is the unmemorable "Marco Polo."

For other Loreena McKennitt albums, be sure to visit my reviews of:
Elemental
To Drive The Cold Winter Away
Parallel Dreams
A Midwinter Night’s Dream


6.5/10

For other music reviews, be sure to visit my Music Review Index Page for an organized listing of all the albums and singles I have reviewed!

© 2012, 2009 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Bringing Fun Back To Getting Vitamin C! Jelly Belly Orange Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy

Click here to buy a case of Jelly Belly Blackberry And Orange Pet Cockroach Gummi Candies!
The Good: Sweet and tastes like oranges, Presence of vitamin C, Fun and whimsical.
The Bad: EXPENSIVE!
The Basics: The new Jelly Belly Orange Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy vastly exceeded my low expections, making it easy for me to recommend this nutritious, but expensive, Gummi candy!


So I have a strategy that, occasionally, backfires on me. I love developing relationships with companies that find this blog and want some press on their new product lines. When I develop such a relationship, I try to be very straightforward with them: I am a very critical reviewer with pretty strong, objective standards that are clearly defined on my website. With that in mind, a few companies send me new products for review and when they do, I have a strategy. When I open the package, the first thing I do is look for a product that I am inherently biased toward. I do this because I want to show the company that has sent me swag to know that I appreciate the freebies and I honestly like being able to recommend an exciting new product that I actually enjoy!

Then, I look for the thing I think I will like the least. I like to assure my readers that I am not a tool for any corporate sponsor and illustrate my independence from the companies – even the ones that treat me well! So, yesterday, I started that process when a package arrived from the fine folks at the Jelly Belly Candy Company. Part one came when I reviewed the new Sunkist Orange Fruit Slices from Jelly Belly (that review is here!), even though it would be a stretch to say I was “biased toward” them initially. To pan a new product, I grabbed the Orange Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy.

Yeah . . . that didn’t quite work out as planned.

The problem is, the Orange Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy turned out to be surprisingly tasty and a lot more fun than I would have guessed. Moreover, it’s pretty nutritious. So, the biggest beefs I have with this candy were the expensive (when I researched them and discovered they sell online in the $1.50 - $1.80 range, I thought that was a bit pricy for a candy that disappeared so quickly!) and supposedly taste like blackberry in addition to the orange flavor (I didn’t get that by the taste). But, the positive elements of this weird, fun candy outweigh the detractions significantly!

Basics

The Orange Pet Cockroach is a flavor of Jelly Belly Gummi Candies and this was actually my first experience with one! Jelly Belly Pet Cockroaches are approximately three and a half inches long by two and a half inches wide by 9/10” thick and shaped like a big, orange and black cockroach with six legs, two antennae, a head, carapace, and the tiniest little tail coming out the butt! Interestingly, the packages do not try to define the flavor, though online they are marketed as an Orange/Blackberry Pet Cockroach.

The Orange Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy from Jelly Bellys are still very new and thus are only available in individual 1.5 oz. packages, or cases of the same. This is represents a single serving and is pretty much how the entire candy industry produces their packs, so (for a change) I have no beef about the packaging. What is alternately cool and really freaky is that each Pet Cockroach comes with a little fact card. The fact card both protects the Pet Cockroach in transit and freaks out the consumer with basic information about the creature the candy is modeled after!

Ease Of Preparation

These are gummi candies, not having to get by an army of actual cockroaches to get into the Temple of Doom without getting emotionally scarred! Consuming these is as easy as opening the individual package, sliding the card and Pet Cockroach out and consuming only one of the two (if you guessed the card, go sit in the corner!). There is no additional prep needed.

Taste

The Jelly Belly Orange Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy has a distinct citrus smell that is, appropriately, of the orange variety. It is not the strongest orange scent, but it is recognizable and it prepares the consumer for a lighter orange taste.

Placing the Orange Pet Cockroach in my mouth, I was surprised by how instantly sweet it was. Many Gummi Candies I have had have a very dry exterior and it is only once that outer, almost leathery layer is pierced (even it if is exceptionally thin) that the flavor is revealed. Not so with the Jelly Belly Orange Pet Cockroach. Instead, this is instantly sweet and fruity.

As soon as the tongue pressed into this Gummi Candy, the full flavor is revealed. True to its word, the Orange Pet Cockroach is actually orange flavored! The taste, which transitions from sweet to mildly tangy in a familiar citrus way, takes on an orange flavor almost more as an aftertaste than a primary taste. Even so, it leaves the flavor of oranges in one’s mouth and is surprisingly delightful for that!

Nutrition

Again, these are Gummi candies, not actual cockroaches or fruit, but the Orange Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy come with 100% of one's RDA of Vitamin C and that makes it a worthwhile alternative to vitamins. Outside that, it behooves one to realized that Gummi Candies, even Jelly Belly Gummi Candies, are not a legitimate source of nutrition. These are a snack food, a dessert, and are in no way an adequate substitute for a real meal. A serving is listed as a single cockroach, with each serving having 130 calories.

Each Jelly Belly Orange Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy is not as bad as they could be in the nutrition area. They have a negligible amount of fat (from Coconut Oil that is way down the ingredient list) and two whole grams of protein. These are not Vegan compliant because they contain gelatin! However, it is Kosher gelatin, so these do appear to be Kosher! They have only one percent of the daily sodium with 15 mg and they are made in a peanut free factory! The main ingredients are corn syrup, sugar, and Kosher gelatin. These are made in a peanut free factory, as well!

Storage/Clean-up

Jelly Belly Orange Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy have a shelf life of approximately one year, though mine did not last fifteen minutes after I opened the package! They remain freshest when they are kept in their package and they ought to be kept in a cool environment. Storing them in hot places is likely to make the gummi candy denature. Kept in a cool, dry place, the Orange Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy seems to retain its flavor well. The Gummi I received yesterday had an expiration date of June 25, 2013 and, had I not opened it today, I am sure that with proper handling, it would easily have lasted that long.

As for cleanup, unless one allows the Orange Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy to get hot to the point that it denatures and gets sticky, there should be no cleanup necessary.

Overall

The Orange Pet Cockroach Gummi Candy from Jelly Belly is fun, surprisingly nutritious, and even more surprisingly educational. If you can afford to give these creepy bugs out on Halloween, you’ll actually be helping kids get their Vitamin C! If not, then as they hit your market this summer, they make for a cool treat once in a while.

For other Jelly Belly products reviewed by me, please check out:
Beanboozled Jelly Bean Assortment
Dark Chocolate Raspberry Dips Jelly Beans
Strawberry Dips Chocolate Covered Jelly Beans

6.5/10

For other food or drink reviews, please visit my index page on the subject by clicking here!

© 2012 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Good, If Not Great, Company: In Good Company

The Good: Decent characters, Generally decent story
The Bad: Acting is generally unimpressive, Not the comedy it is billed as
The Basics: In an ultimately average movie, the principle actors give blase performances that make In Good Company a disappointment from a decent writer/director.


Scarlett Johansson is rapidly becoming one of those actresses I want to like but continue to find myself underwhelmed by. I see her appeal - a lot easier than that of Kirsten Dunst! - but I have come to realize that she's not used enough to her benefit (like the terrible Lost In Translation, reviewed here, where her performance is all that makes the character worth watching) or is appearing in a number of roles that she is simply not used enough (like The Prestige, reviewed here!). In Good Company, where Johansson receives third billing falls into the latter category, where she ends up more as a supporting player than an actual star.

When fifty-something advertising sales executive Dan Foreman's company is bought out by a major conglomerate, Foreman finds a twenty-six year old taking his job, despite the youth having no experience in the field. Carter Duryea takes over feeling the insecurity of his personal life clashing with the expectations of his professional life. When his wife leaves him and he gets into a car accident, he starts dating Foreman's daughter Alex, who is now studying at NYU. Carter and Dan clash professionally and personally over their life and job decisions.

And the main problem is that In Good Company is billed as a comedy and it's not terribly funny. There are moments that are amusing, but the movie is largely a dramatic presentation of the changing world of business and the problematic aspects of multinational conglomerates. The romantic plot between Carter and Alex is almost an afterthought and it never seems as genuine as the conflicts between Carter and Dan.

So, the first people this movie is not for are those looking for a romantic comedy. You'd likely be disappointed. On the business end, the movie's views on the changing world of business make some very good points; there are dangers in monopolies, nothing beats the personal touch and inexperienced suits ought not to replace experienced individuals who have proven their professional worth. But the movie's answers are all too simple. In Good Company effectively ignores the fact that the world is changing in favor of creating a statement that boils down to "the business world was better before multinational corporations." Thus, anyone looking for an interesting, compelling business movie with real insight is also going to be disappointed.

The characters are archetypes, or at least "types" more than individuals. Dan is a seasoned businessman who is always clever enough to get out of situations using the tried and true techniques he has developed over years and years. Carter, conversely, is an up and coming talent who seems to lose all of this innate talent and drive when his personal life hits a rut. I didn't buy that. Overachievers have a tendency to drive themselves into new projects when old ones collapse, it's part of the way they fail to deal with failure (yea overachiever defense mechanisms!).

And Alex is just a stereotype of the 18 year-old who doesn't know what she wants. She's a jock who wants to be intellectual - complete with the tired rumors that she's a lesbian. There's no real chemistry between Alex and Carter. She's amused by him and he's honest with her, but beyond that, there's nothing terribly compelling about their coming together. Instead, the direction of their relationship is completely believable.

But it's not interesting to watch. In Good Company has moments of entertainment, but the bulk of it fails at even that. I write that without rancor; I was looking to this movie to continue a string a decent movies I've seen lately.

What sold me on seeing it in the first place was Topher Grace and Scarlett Johansson in the previews. Grace is essentially playing the same role he did on That 70s Show, in a modern corporate setting. He does not do anything significantly different with his acting talents here and that was disappointing. Johansson barely has enough screentime to be labeled as a nonentity. Her character is . . . well, dull, so the only way to classify her acting here as decent is to acknowledge that she sold her character as dull. There is nothing terribly superlative about Alex or Johansson's performance.

In Good Company features decent actors in bit roles. David Paymer appears as Mort, a worker whose performance puts his job in question. The always-wonderful Philip Baker Hall appears as an angry-at-youth businessman and lends some gravitas to the role. There's even a cameo by Malcolm McDowell that is worthwhile. That the bit roles in the movie draw my attention and praise more than two of the three leads is not a good sign.

Dennis Quaid keeps the movie watchable as Dan Foreman. Quaid is articulate and believable as an aging businessman. Quaid lends strong body language to conveying his character's moods and that is effective for creating the character the audience most empathizes with.

Still, it's not enough. Paul Weitz, writer and director of In Good Company recently hit success with the brilliant satire American Dreamz (also using Dennis Quaid, reviewed here!) and before that with the surprisingly good About A Boy (reviewed here!). So it's not that he cannot write and/or direct fabulous movies. It's just that in this case, he doesn't.

For other works with Clark Gregg, please be sure to check out my reviews of:
The Avengers
Thor
Iron Man 2
Iron Man
The West Wing
A.I.: Artificial Intelligence
State And Main
Sports Night
The Usual Suspects

5/10

For other movie reviews, be sure to visit my Movie Review Index Page for an organized listing of all the films I have reviewed!

© 2012, 2007 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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