Such A Good Start, Lovesick Sinks Unfortunately Fast!

The Good: High charm factor, Some good lines
The Bad: Repetitive, Predictable plot, Droll narrative technique
The Basics: The Matt LeBlanc romantic comedy Lovesick starts out so fresh, but develops into an unwatchable mess as it repeats itself over and over again.


As Valentine’s Day rapidly approaches, the major studios and the indie distributors are releasing their held-back romantic comedies. Unfortunately, many of them have been fizzling this year, like Love, Rosie (reviewed here!). This year is not going to be the one that sees the next When Harry Met Sally . . . (reviewed here!), but the one that at least alludes to it is Lovesick. Lovesick is a Matt LeBlanc vehicle that is surprisingly high on charm and has some decent lines to it, even if it is unlikely to get much attention.

Matt LeBlanc has had his greatest success since Friends (reviewed here!) playing a parody of himself on Episodes and Lovesick seems to illustrate that either he was perfectly cast for Friends, has a very limited range, or is just exceptionally good at playing fun, kind, slightly goofy characters. His character of Charlie Darby is hardly as ridiculous as his character of Joey, but LeBlanc plays the character with a similar sense of wide-eyed optimism.

After having his heart broken many, many times, Charlie vows to not fall in love again and to only date people he can see no future with. The day after going out with his best friend and his wife, with a disastrous, racist date, Charlie is visited at his school by Molly, who is looking for a job at the school. When Charlie and Molly start dating, things seem too good to believe. Molly goes off to Las Vegas, telling Charlie it is to visit her sick Grandmother. Charlie Facebook stalks Molly and learns that she has a boyfriend in Las Vegas and breaks up with her via text.

Charlie’s best friend Jason brings one of Charlie’s ex-girlfriends over and she shows him her dissertation, which illustrates how some people in love exhibit the same biochemical traits as psychotics. Realizing this allows Jason to talk Charlie down and together they erase the break-up texts before Molly can read them. They go off together for a weekend, where Charlie is exceptionally jealous of her talking to other men. After capers with visiting her parents and a jealous incident that makes Charlie believe that Molly is having an affair with Dr. Oz in Tuscany, Charlie has to decide whether to come clean to Molly or get the help he desperately needs.

Lovesick is big on charm and has a number of moments that feel very fun. Charlie sending Molly’s grandmother 1,000 cantaloupes as a “get well” gift before framing Molly’s nephew to get information on the family is pretty original and well-executed. But the neurosis starts to eat away at the charm about midway through the movie. The more Charlie overreacts, the more the film starts to drag.

The premise of Lovesick is original-enough, but it quickly becomes repetitive. Charlie continues to leap to inappropriate conclusions, like that Molly is cheating on him with the concierge, without modifying his behavior. This actually makes some sense; if Charlie is biochemically a psychotic when he is in love, simply acknowledging the problem should not fix it. If Jason truly believed that Michelle was right about Charlie, it seems like he would have encouraged Charlie to go see a psychiatrist and get him on anti-psychotics. Fortunately, that is actually addressed in the film. That allows the elementary school’s counselor the chance to amuse for a scene.

Similarly, the narrative technique utilized in Lovesick is tiresome. Lovesick is narrated by Jason and while it seems like that might be going somewhere, it seems tough to believe that Charlie would confess so very much to Jason. The narration by Jason seems to be an excuse for filler more than an organic or creative way to tell the story.

Matt LeBlanc does fine as Charlie Darby, but it is hardly a stretch for his talents and prior repertoire. Ali Larter does great as Molly; this is a charming, generally fun role for a woman who usually plays hardasses. In fact, I can’t think of a role in which Larter smiles as much as she does over the course of the one hundred minutes of Lovesick. With brief supporting roles from Chevy Chase, Kristen Johnson, Rachael Harris and Richard Riehl, Lovesick feels like it has the performance power to make for a decent mainstream film release.

Unfortunately, Lovesick just doesn’t have the script for it. The idea is executed ridiculously quickly and LeBlanc plays the paranoia far more efficiently than he plays the affection that Charlie has for Molly. The result is a lot less pleasant than the set-up implies.

For other works with Ali Larter, please check out my reviews of:
Heroes
A Lot Like Love
Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back
Legally Blonde

4/10

For other movie reviews, please check out my Film Review Index Page for an organized listing!

© 2015 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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A Fine Historical Document, Nothing More Saturday Night Live - The Complete First Season On DVD.

The Good: Moments of humor, Great historical relevance
The Bad: Becomes far too self-referential, Early episodes are scattered, Repetitive, Does not use whole cast well.
The Basics: A trip down memory lane for those who lived it, a mediocre historical document for the rest of us, NBC's Saturday Night's first season is unremarkable.


Every now and then, I come across a work that I pick up on DVD to review and when I'm done, I know that an objective review of the material I've just witnessed will bring about a small storm of negative comments. As I finish my viewing of the mistitled Saturday Night Live - Season 1, I find myself overwhelmingly underwhelmed. Yes, I am overcome with how unimpressed I am with this boxed set. Capturing the 1975 - 1976 season of the sketch comedy show NBC’s Saturday Night and Saturday Night, what would become Saturday Night Live, this eight disc set follows on the heels of years of terrible "Best Of" collections which focus on individual performers from the Saturday Night Live family of performers. What this boxed set reveals, more than anything, is how tenuous a start the cultural phenomenon that is Saturday Night Live had.

With all twenty-four episodes on eight discs, the first season of the show that became a sketch comedy series is presented almost as it originally appeared in the mid-1970s. NBC’s Saturday Night starts out as a variety show, with almost all of its parts divorced from one another. Executive Producer Lorne Michaels assembled a show that featured a guest star - usually a comic or musician -, musical guest(s), Muppets, and a sketch comedy troupe that soon became known as the "Not Ready For Prime Time Players." That troupe was quickly whittled down to Dan Aykroyd, John Belushi, Jane Curtain, Chevy Chase, Garrett Morris, Laraine Newman, and Gilda Radner.

The series began as far more of a variety show, with the "Not Ready For Prime Time Players" contributing far less in the beginning than they did by the middle and end of the season. So, for example, the first episode starred George Carlin, who held court on an open stage several times in the episode. But less of his standup routines, he presented himself in a more philosophical light. And he bombed. That's not just me saying that, listening to the audience reacting, I was wondering if they had a cricket machine they could have plugged in to give feedback! Alas, they did not and it took until the last set before Carlin began to get laughs from the audience. His musings now seem somewhat banal and very dated. And I like George Carlin!

In addition to Carlin, there were two musical guests who each did two sets, a short film presented by Albert Brooks, the Muppets from the land of Gorch, and a few sketches, most notably the news, which was hosted by Chevy Chase. I swear I cannot recall what any of the sketches that first episode were. But there were very few. And they were fairly unmemorable as they squeezed in between Carlin mellowly lecturing the audience, rock stars of the day and the somewhat surreal experience of adulterous monstrous Muppets.

Beginning with the second episode, Chevy Chase opens each episode with a pratfall, which he begins to reference as the season progresses. But the second episode is an exceptional example of how different NBC’s Saturday Night is from the Saturday Night Live it became. Paul Simon was the host, not the musical guest, and almost the entire program involves him singing. The show opens, he sings two songs, Art Garfunkel is brought on, they do two songs together, Garfunkel does one alone and Simon gets an additional song (maybe two) on his own. Before you know it, the episode is over. And, again, sketches are stuck in between the other stuff.

That said, this season introduced the world to the physical and satirical comedy of Chevy Chase. He falls into most episodes and relentlessly mocks president Gerald Ford and the deceased president Franco of Spain. He fumbles his way through the news and has the honor of delivering the "Live from New York, it's Saturday night!" line every outing. As well, it contains the Samuri (he's a tailor, deli chef, divorcee etc. depending on the week), Gilda Radner's hearing-impaired social activist Emily Litella, and the Headmaster for the New York School For The Hearing Impaired. As the season progresses, the sketches begin to be tailored to the guest host, like a short film containing Raquel Welch dancing (and nothing else!), Ford's Press Secretary portraying Press Secretaries Through History, and Buck Henry playing nervous white guys.

It's intriguing to watch the first season and see who was considered famous and cutting edge enough to present the show as a guest host. The first season was hosted by: George Carlin, Paul Simon, Robert Klein, Buck Henry, Dudley Moore and Peter Cook, Rob Reiner, Lily Tomlin, Candice Bergen, Peter Boyle, Dezi Arnez, Madeline Kahn, Ron Nessen, Raquel Welch, Anthony Perkins, Elliot Gould, Dyan Cannon, Louise Lasser, Kris Kristofferson and Richard Pryor. The musical guests are interesting for their mix of artists that have remained well known, like Paul Simon, Patti Smith, Abba (who lip-synched one of their songs for some reason), Gordon Lightfoot and Carly Simon (who had a recorded performance, though it's cool because Chevy Chase actually joined her on "You're So Vain!") and those who seem to have been either one-hit wonders or whose works faded from the general popular rotation, like Janis Ian, Betty Carter, Martha Reeves, Phoebe Snow, John Sebastian, Leon Redbone, Harian Collins and Joyce Everson, and Leon and Mary Russell. Indeed, two of the most memorable musical performances involve Garrett Morris singing an opera piece and John Belushi's one-trick pony sweaty rock star (it starts as a Joe Cocker impression) interrupting Leon and Mary Russell. It is also worth noting that Howard Shore, the composer for Peter Jackson's Lord Of The Rings films (among others) is the band leader and composer for the orchestra this season!

And I'll admit, I was cheesed when Belushi cut Gordon Lightfoot's guitar strings because I was hoping he might perform "Sundown!" The problem here is that this DVD set is presenting a sketch comedy/variety show that is very dated. The reason is simple; the humor is topical. It's fresh and funny in 1975 to comment on Gerald Ford and the wide-open 1976 Primary contest. Those of us who lived through the Reagan Regime will delight to hear Chevy Chase (and others) relentlessly mock his first presidential bid as he loses the Republican primary to Ford (which ought to have been the death knell of his political career!). But it's pure nostalgia and it often makes references that will leave the less educated viewers completely lost. So, for example, most high school history courses will not teach students that George Wallace was a vociferous racist, which becomes the focus of all non-wheelchair jokes pertaining to Wallace.

There are two general categories of sketch comedy series: current events and broadbased satire. Cultural Events sketch comedy rely heavily on observations of politics, societal trends and pop culture of the day. Broadbased satire attempts to more frequently comment on the nature of human existence and immutable social institutions. It's the difference between comedy that pokes fun at Gerald Ford and Jaws (reviewed here!) and comedy that lashes out at Monarchy and male/female relationships. Are the two mutually exclusive? Absolutely not, but very few comedy troupes find a decent balance (though most do a Jaws, Star Trek, - the first of many Trek parodies appears late in this set! - and Star Wars parody at some point) and Saturday Night, when it becomes more of a sketch comedy show leans heavily toward the Cultural Events category as opposed to the Broadbased Satire grouping.

The final problems with the content are that as it evolves, the show begins to take some weird turns and becomes much more self-referential. Albert Brooks's short films, which were generally not terribly funny to begin with (though some were not supposed to be), were replaced by similar short films from someone whose name I don't even remember now (it's Weis, by the way). Come to think of it, I couldn't tell you the subject of even one of his short films despite having just finished watching the first season finale less than two hours ago. Albert Brooks, by the way, had short films that included him performing a bypass surgery and searching for the next big thing (there was a blind cab driver in that one); I might not have dug them, but they were vaguely memorable. Come to think of it, the other guy did one where he intercut a p.i. recalling how he catches cheating spouses and a new couple expressing their love for one another. The thing is, as the season progresses, fans were invited to send in home movies and they included peanuts slicing up a guy who ate a ton of peanuts, a choral song presented from a men's bathroom, and apple strippers (peelers); I recalled three instantly.

The point here is that the show is dramatically erratic, episode to episode and within episodes. It does not take long before the adult Muppets are canned, as are some of the writers who begin as part of the Not Ready For Prime Time Players. But most of all, it's dated. As well, there are several bits that are repetitive. The season featured parody commercials, many of which are replayed more than once, which is accented as a problem on the DVDs when one sits and watches them back to back.

Saturday Night Live - The Complete First Season goes a long way toward proving the argument I made when I reviewed Star Trek - The Complete First Season (Remastered), which is that the technology exists to clean up the old series', but it is often too costly to be realistic for restoration. Recently, Star Trek has been given a complete face-lift for HD and while the visual effects have been altered, the cleanup for HD removing film imperfections and the general grain of 1960s filmstock makes for a decent presentation. What we get with this DVD set is a series plagued by light burns, dust spots and the grainy quality that comes with the filmstock of the time. Yes, there has clearly been some remastering (though there are still fall-outs on the soundtrack at various points), but this is not the archiving of a historical document, nor the restoration of it to the best it could possibly be. Instead, we get a half-measure, a compromise print that makes the thirty year-old series look respectable, but not as good as it could look (and sound).

As well, this boxed set makes poor use of the DVD medium by presenting little in the way of bonus features. There are no commentary tracks and only two featurettes, both from 1975 - an interview and casting tapes. Those who are invested enough (emotionally) in this series to invest in the capital to purchase the set are likely to be disappointed that there are no featurettes discussing the cultural impact, the relevance or even the effect the show had. Some of that is addressed within the series in self-referential comments, but much of it is a complete mystery. The series is a fair historical document of mid-70's humor, music and celebrity, but there is nothing to make this set valuable for that by actually addressing it.

As it stands, the photo booklet gives the most information on that sort of thing and it is woefully little. Die-hard fans (the ones I lost with my opening lines of this review) who might have been waiting for this boxed set for the years it took to get all of the musical clearances needed to assemble this set are likely to be even more disappointed than I was (a lowly cinematic historian) by the lack of extensive bonus features exploring either the development of the season, commentary on specific sketches, or the impact or even any form of retrospective from surviving cast members on their impressions thirty years later.

But alas, there is nothing like that. Instead, we have endless references to Gerald Ford's stupidity, Patty Hearst (the O.J. trial of the day, I suppose), Francisco Franco's continuing death, and the rising political lights of the 1976 primary race. We have pained performances by Andy Kaufman (he comes on and lip-synchs, one of which where he has guests performing with him and he's electric on) that are sometimes more disturbing than funny, there is a broad array of musical guests that appeal to a huge segment of society as opposed to the narrow visions of 12 - 24 pop culture (that's something that actually is pretty okay), and the endless opening falls of Chevy Chase. And it might have been great in its day, but now, it's a historical document in a way that other sketch comedy shows are not (but someday The Daily Show will be!).

My final comment on this is this: this set is not ideal for fans of today's Saturday Night Live. If you have a youngster that loves Saturday Night Live, this is the ideal gift for that kid's parents, so they have something to bond over. Nowhere near as relentlessly (attempting to be) funny as today's Saturday Night Live, this requires a lot more patience and despite the supposed genius of the Not Ready For Prime Time Players, this is very skewed toward Chevy Chase and Jane Curtain (as the season goes on and Gilda Radner picks up the recurring Barbara Walters impression, she gets good airtime as well). How Dan Aykroyd made it big based on the first season remains a mystery. Laraine Newman, John Belushi and Garrett Morris are given ridiculously little to do as well.

Lopsided and dated, this boxed set is best for those who appreciated it the first time around, but it's more likely they'd get as much out of renting it as opposed to buying it; this eight-disc set has little to come back to more than once.

For more work with Lily Tomlin, please check out my reviews on:
The Pink Panther 2
The West Wing
A Prairie Home Companion
Orange County

4/10

For other television reviews, be sure to check out my Index Page for an organized listing!

© 2012, 2007 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.

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This Is Not Galaxy Quest: Zoom: Academy For Superheroes Is Too Stupid Even For Children

The Good: None.
The Bad: Wow, where to start: acting, characters, humor, plot
The Basics: In an unredeemable waste of time, children are trained to be superheroes in a movie that is as predictable as it is unfunny.


Wow. This is where actor's go for their careers to die.

You've no idea how much I wish that could be my entire review for Zoom: Academy For Superheroes, a movie I sat down to watch thinking it might be like Galaxy Quest (reviewed here!). Alas, despite the presence of Tim Allen, this was not the case. Apparently based on a children's book series, Zoom is a kid's movie and offers absolutely nothing for an adult audience. While the concept could have been executed in a way that might entertain adults (a la Mystery Men, reviewed here!) this is not the case, though Smashmouth did the music for this film, like they provided songs for Mystery Men.

Years ago, there were superheroes developed by the U.S. government and the most notable of them were the brothers Jack and Connor Shepard. Jack became the leader of the group with his ability to move quite fast; he was known as Captain Zoom. His brother, when the government tried to augment the superheroes' natural powers, became the villainous Concussion. Now, years later, Concussion is returning from another dimension and giving a plot-convenient fourteen days to arrive. This will allow the somewhat moronic Dr. Grant and his hot assistant Marsha to enlist Jack Shepard to train a new team of superheroes to take on and defeat Concussion.

In the first few moments of Zoom: Academy For Superheroes, the viewer knows the film is headed for stupidity and disaster when Dr. Grant is ordered to assemble a new team of young superheroes by finding the misfits and social outcasts. That line of dialogue just made me groan, but even I was unprepared for the stupidity that would follow. The first example of a "misfit" is a six year old girl who is bullied for her Halloween candy and responds by throwing him up into a tree. The ridiculous simplicity of this is compounded by the annoyed look Cindy's mother gives her for tossing the bully into a tree. Were I little superhuman Cindy, I think it would be a fair reaction to wonder why mom just watched me being bullied and looked annoyed at ME for responding the way I did! Cliche #2 is bullied girl, 16 year-old Summer who is annoyed by cheerleaders who keep taking her lunch tray and pushing before her in line. Her solution? Use her telekinetic powers to boil the sauces which blow up onto the cheerleaders who obligingly stand before the sauces waiting for it to happen.

It doesn't even matter who comes next - there are two boys to balance the two girls - this is just dumped itself into the realms of utter, unredeeming stupidity. It's so terribly convenient that when asked to find "social misfits," "kids who don't fit in," Dr. Grant finds them so easily in white, middle-class suburbia. This is the whitest group of social outcasts I've ever seen. They are all obediently white, clean, middle class, and heterosexual (no doubt) with good American surnames like "Williams," "Jones," "West," and "Collins." Not a "Hershel" or "Freeman" among them!

Outside the utter conceptual stupidity of Zoom, the movie progresses to go from bad to worse with the team converging on the training facility for the most hackneyed gags (there is much falling down and knocking into things) and predictable blunders that even a child could not find surprising. As the threat of Concussion moves closer, the team goes through normal and predictable foibles that come with a superhero team in a kid's movie.

The enduring problem of Zoom: Academy For Superheroes is in the writing. Adam Rifkin, David Berenbaum, and Jason Lethcoe create characters that are all "types." None are extraordinary and none break the mold for who they could be or what they represent. The superheroes Mega Boy, Wonder, Houdini, and Princess are anything but special and director Peter Hewitt does not even make the movie look interesting.

The child actors playing the four heroes are universally bad. There are no Anna Paquins or Dakota Fannings here. These kids are children playing dress up and run around on celluloid. Sadly, the adult actors in Zoom are no better. Courtney Cox's performance as the supporting "woman" role is uninspired and serves only to remind the viewer that she got her start dancing with Bruce Springsteen - and that was a more natural acting job.

Tim Allen does his usual shtick as Allen that he's done innumerable times before. Here he's not funny and he's not entertaining and the character is in no way challenging or pushing forth his abilities in any meaningful way. Sadly, Allen makes an already terrible movie drag on with his uninspired antics.

The only one who is measurably worse is the aging Chevy Chase. On Family Guy, (in "Brian The Bachelor," season four - volume 4 on the DVDs) there's a joke about not mocking Chevy Chase because "He seems like the kinda guy who would sue. I mean, that guy's gotta have, like, no money left." Zoom: Academy For Superheroes seems to depend on that and Chase gives an awkward and ridiculously bad performance that mortgages any sense that he might have ever had any sort of comic genius. So, for example, much of his comedy here consists of screwing his face up slightly and speaking in a mildly high pitched voice, like in the beginning when the General notes that Concussion was destroyed years ago and they watched it happen and Chase merely nods yes, while saying "no."

This movie is an utter disappointment with nothing to offer adults in the way of entertainment. It's too stupid for even children. I'm shocked I could muster up so many words to describe how worthless this movie was. I'm surprised you could bear to read them all.

After all, this is where careers go to die.

For other works with Rip Torn, be sure to visit my reviews of:
Men In Black
Wonderboys
Men In Black II
Marie Antoinette
Men In Black 3

.5/10

For other film reviews, be sure to check out my Movie Review Index Page for an organized listing!

© 2012, 2007 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Just Another Teen Movie: Orange County

The Good: Amusing In parts, Cameos, Moments of acting
The Bad: Much of the plot, Predictable character arcs, Oversimplified resolutions
The Basics: A surprisingly disappointing film, Orange County follows a witless quest to get into Stanford or maybe learn the obvious.


When I sat down to Orange County, I had high hopes. I had seen some extended trailers for it and I was excited; it looked intelligent and funny. Within a half hour into the flick, I was fast on my way to being disappointed. It appeared early on that the eighty-some minute film put its best moments forth in the three minute trailer.

Orange County follows Shaun Brumder, A-student, aspiring author on his quest to get into Stanford. What ought to be an easy task for this brilliant young man is thwarted by a dimwitted guidance counselor who mistakenly sends the wrong transcript to the college. Shaun then goes on a road trip with his drug addled brother Lance and idealistic girlfriend Ashley to Stanford to make the case for Shaun's admission in person. And the film goes down from there. In the process of trying to set things right, Shaun meets his idol, author Marcus Skinner, Ashley drugs the dean of admissions and Lance burns down the admissions building.

Sigh. I had such hopes for this film. In truth, this film begins with an intelligent premise and a slick sense of humor and quickly degenerates into an oversimplistic fantasy of a teenager whose from a broken home. I don't mean Shaun, though his parents are divorced, I mean the author of this film. All of the conflicts in Orange County are resolved quickly and without any real insight into the human condition.

The purpose of the film seems to be to get Shaun into Stanford and Shaun's journey into understanding that Orange County is where he truly needs to be. But the premise is set up for a film far more intelligent than that. That is, a kid as bright as Shaun ought to have figured out by the end of high school that kids everywhere are essentially the same. It comes as a revelation to Shaun that Stanford students listen to the same music, feel the same way about literature and dress essentially the same as those in Orange County. Stanford doesn't equal deep and intellectual and a student as bright as Shaun ought to have realized this long before now.

Instead, this seems to come as a tremendous revelation to Shaun and it comes across as silly to the viewer. Shaun ends up appearing far more dimwitted than reasonable. And his conflict with Stanford is too easily resolved. In fact, all conflicts are too simply and neatly tied up by the end. Shaun's parents, divorced for some time, have one affair and decide to get back together, Shaun's father donates a vast amount of money to Stanford to get Shaun in and Ashley simply asks Shaun to stay and he acquiesces. None of the conflicts seem to have any magnitude as they are all simply resolved along the path of least resistance.

Or the path that requires the least drama and sensibility. The plot with Shaun's parents is especially troubling for anyone looking for anything intelligent here.

Equally disturbing is the acting in Orange County. The cast is made up of actors playing characters and a pool of cameos. Colin Hanks does a competent job as Shaun, creating a strange mix of apathy and manic devotion to the concept of Stanford. Jack Black does a wonderful job as Lance, making the drugged out stereotype funny and almost realistic.

Schuyler Fisk, who plays Ashley, is said to be one of today's hottest stars. After Orange County, I'm not sure why. Outside bringing her fabulous hair to the project, she added nothing to Ashley that wasn't on the page and didn't seem to radiate anything. In fact, John Lithgow had far more screen presence, infusing facial gestures and body language with lines that could easily have come across as canned to create one of the film's most noteworthy characters.

And then there are the cameos. Garry Marshall, Harold Ramis, Chevy Chase, Lily Tomlin, Kevin Kline and Ben Stiller all appear in the film. Now, I'm not an idiot; those are all actors, not characters. Too bad they don't actually work that way in the movie. In Orange County, these brief roles appear and the top name actors who play them bring nothing to the roles besides themselves. So, for instance, when Ben Stiller appears as a fireman, the scene plays as Ben Stiller in a fireman's uniform. It's still Ben Stiller. And Stiller is fine, but he's not playing a fireman, he's playing Ben Stiller. And so on with all of these cameos.

That's disappointing, but typical for a film that sells itself well in the three minute version, but fails to deliver for the bulk of the picture. Orange County is plagued by cliches of the irresponsible older brother, the overachieving father and the kooky girlfriend and resolutions that are disproportionately simple to the problems.

That's not to say it's all bad. The film is funny and I found myself laughing at several points, especially near the beginning. And if I have nothing else to do, it's likely I'll even watch the flick again. But I'll always be disappointed because I was convinced this was going to break the mold and be something worth seeing over and over again. Instead, I got the same old comedy. I'd rather watch Dogma. Hell, even Mallrats has a leg up on this.

For other works with John Lithgow, please visit my reviews of:
Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes
Leap Year
Confessions Of A Shopaholic
Shrek
Terms Of Endearment

5/10

For other film reviews, please visit my Movie Review Index Page for an organized listing of them!

© 2012, 2002 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Once Upon A Time, I Woke Up In An Alternate Universe Where National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation Was Considered Funny!

The Good: I never thought I'd say something as simplistic as: It ends. It ends.
The Bad: Not funny, poor acting, re-casting, lack of character, simplistic
The Basics: Don't watch this film; it's not funny. Honest.


I've watched hundreds of movies and listened to almost as many compact discs that are new to me. That usually brings me great joy because then I review them and that pleases me. Whenever I used to write reviews for the website I wrote for, I would get a little bead on what others think about these things I experience (or am subjected to). National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation was in the latter group. I saw it originally in 1989 when I suppose I would have been 13. I laughed then. I saw it a few years ago and again in the past few days. I don't think I even smiled. We'll get into that in a moment. I was shocked to discover it was highly-rated in the community I used to review for! And yet, I had not laughed. My first thought was that everyone else watched a different film than I did. My only other explanation is I fell into an alternate universe of lowered standards, unintelligible giggling and an atmosphere filled with laughing gas. Or, perhaps, an alternate universe where the Christmas Vacation was different from the one I watched, where it was funny.

Christmas Vacation follows the ill-fated Griswold family of Vacation, European Vacation, and later Vegas Vacation mis-adventures in their attempt to survive the Christmas holiday by bringing together their assorted family members. This includes your basic lower class, RV living Cousin Eddie (played by Randy Quaid in what I assumed would have been a poor period where he was desperate for work considering how horrible the role is and how unfunny it is; you may imagine my surprise when I discovered he did three other films in 1989 and at least four in 1990!). He's supposed to be the spoofy "white trash" character and his typical gag is emptying his RV's septic system into the sewer drain early on the morning of Christmas Eve.

Clark Griswold is determined to make it the best Christmas ever, which means hanging many lights of the roof. It also means Chevy Chase, who plays Clark Griswold, does yet again his falling down routine that he made popular spoofing President Ford on Saturday Night Live. In case the "yet again" was somehow passed over there, allow me to make explicit; here it's not funny. It's old, done, beaten into the ground. It falls flat. It means that Clark is spending the first half of the film depending on the Christmas bonus that is to arrive, fantasizing about the pool he wants to put in with the money (or more accurately the cheap vixen who will grace his pool naked if he gets the bonus and puts the pool in), and the latter half dealing with the ramifications of the bonus not being what is expected.

The humor is a lot of simple reversal jokes, cheap pokes and everyone and everything, slapstick and other utterly unfunny attempts to revive this franchise. There's a cat who we're supposed to find funny that it is boxed up as a gift, and later electrocuted into the rug. We're supposed to find the two minute chase around the house of a squirrel humorous when it isn't terribly funny watching people run from left to right frantically screaming. I mean, basically, that's what every joke in this film truly is: people running, people being frantic, animals running, gravity working, that we are supposed to find laugh out loud funny. It's not though. You've heard one sewer joke, you've heard them all. To keep bringing up the same joke about the sewer is just agonizing. Similarly, when the aged relatives appear, jokes are made involving deafness and toupees. Yippee.

There's no wit in this film. There's even less humor. The acting is sorely lacking. Chevy Chase isn't measuring up to any of his prior moments of genius (if he had it, I'd recommend going back to the original Saturday Night Live to try to find it). Barbara D'Angelo is lost playing his wife. There's absolutely no chemistry between the two.

One of my issues is with the children. Through no fault of their own, the franchise is unwilling to stick with any two actors to continue to play Audrey and Rusty. Here, they're cast as younger than in the last installment and these kids seem horribly out of place. They're not funny, they're not sincere, they lack character.

I will admit this: I did have an emotional reaction to parts of the film. In fact, I cried. Watching poor Julia Louis-Dreyfus and Doris Roberts, two fine actresses, condemned to this film and then roles that were flat, unfunny and just plain bad.

Numbers may be against me, but I will stand up and refuse to recommend this film. In truth, the lack of humor is enough. But I'll add to that, poor acting, non-existent support of a decent script, and complete lack of character or realism that sink this film.

For other comedy films, please check out my reviews of:
But I'm A Cheerleader!
Date Night
Easy A

1/10

For other film reviews, please visit my index page by clicking here!

© 2001, 2010 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.



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It's Not Even Funny, It's Just Bad: Hot Tub Time Machine Flops!

The Good: Initially novel concept, Decent casting
The Bad: Not terribly funny, No character development, Predictable, Foul language, Uninspired acting
The Basics: With only one or two laughs, Hot Tub Time Machine is easy to avoid as it uses actors in familiar ways to tell a ridiculous story.


[When I wrote this review originally, I was actually at the preview screening for Hot Tub Time Machine. Despite the movie being out now on DVD, I decided to keep my original opening. I stand by my panning of the film largely because the other night, while my wife was ill, I got the movie out from the library and my wife and I were so bored by it that we fell asleep while it was on! Enjoy the review!]

Right now, I am being one of those people I loathe. I’m at the back of a movie theater at a preview screening and I’m typing on my iPod Touch writing a review. I’m writing a review because the movie I am watching is so incredibly bad that my mind is wandering and I’m losing track of all of the things I want to say about how bad the movie is. So, rather than be one of the many (there have already been twenty that I’ve counted) people who walk out, I figured I’d just take some notes. That turned into writing the actual review.

The movie I am stuck at right now is Hot Tub Time Machine. I actually got a bit excited for Hot Tub Time Machine after seeing the trailers and thinking that this might be this year’s The Hangover. It is not. While that film took the tired road trip genre and male-bonding film and turned it on its ear with the story of three guys actually trying to take responsibility for a night of drunken revelry, Hot Tub Time Machine is just the opposite. The initially amusing premise, with four guys from 2010 taking a trip back to 1986 via a hot tub, quickly degenerates into a long string of swearing, body function jokes and the glorification of drunken stupidity. My usual complaint about homophobia in movies is accented by the fact that some of the first jokes in the movie are anti-gay jokes.

Adam, Lou, and Nick take their young friend, Jacob, on a ski weekend to Kodiak Valley, a ski resort where Adam promises Jacob there is a lot of drinking and women to go around. But, after an evening of boring games and an inability to pick up hookers (in no small part because of Nick’s cold feet over being married), they discover they have a hot tub. After a lot of drinking and hanging out there, they awaken the next morning to discover they look different in the mirrors and everyone around them appears to be doing a whole “retro” weekend thing. But Jacob quickly surmises that they have gone back in time and that they are stuck there until they can get back.

Fearing that they shouldn’t mess up the timeline, the guys set to doing what they did while at the resort in 1986 while Jacob tries to figure out how to get them back to their own time. For Adam, this means breaking up with April, though he does not know why he broke up with her in the first place. For Nick, it means having sex with someone who isn't his wife and getting up on stage to perform a gig that might have been his peak and for Lou it means doing a lot of drugs and drinking and getting beaten up in a fight because his friends did not back him up. But when April leaves Adam during the weekend, it seems their plan to stop influencing events is falling apart and all of the men (and a squirrel) begin messing with the timeline.

The idea of high-minded time travel humor and explaining how and what has happened quickly gives way to a long series of jokes about having sex, doing drugs, and long streams of profanities. The cursing isn’t even funny after the first few jokes and in the 1986 sequences, the swearing gets over-the-top at some points, most notably as the men react to being back in time. The movie is plagued by appealing to the lowest common denominator in that it doesn’t even try to be clever. Jacob’s mother, Kelly, is in 1986 at the resort and he’s surprised to learn that she is essentially a skank in that time period before becoming the prude he knew.

What Hot Tub Time Machine truly lacks is character and this is evident most with Nick. Nick is married and, admittedly, his wife rules his life in the future. As this movie lurches toward a conclusion, I’m figuring that he’ll use the experience to tell her off back in the future when they make it back, but it doesn’t matter. In 1986, it takes minimal coercion to get him to be unfaithful to his wife and it makes it hard to care what might happen to him, though there is absolutely no sense of menace or consequence in the film.

None of the characters are particularly empathetic and Chevy Chase’s cameos as the repairman is stiflingly unfunny, leaving those who might hope his career would rebound with this shaking their heads. But what strikes me the most as this goes on (it’s a short film and it’s winding up now) is that it is entirely familiar. To wit, Craig Robinson, who plays Nick, is essentially playing the character he played in Zack And Miri Make A Porno. This does not make his performance, which has had limited laughs after over an hour of the movie, great acting or even reasonable comedy. Instead, it means he was well cast and the problem for me is I haven’t laughed at his lines because he is delivering them with the same sense of person that I’ve seen from him time and again. Those who like Robinson’s works are going to feel cheated; this might as well be an extension of Zack And Miri Make A Porno for him or even a particularly foul episode of The Office as far as his acting is concerned.

On a similar note, I had only seen Clark Duke in Sex Drive and after more than a year since I saw that movie, he hasn’t shown me anything I haven’t seen from him before either. Even Rob Corddry, whose work on Family Guy and The Winner was funny and clever, is falling flat as Lou. Only John Cusak managed to get a smile from me and that’s because his usual good-guy character actually seemed very un-Cusak like when he went on a profanity-ridden rant.

How did so many people with talent get suckered into Hot Tub Time Machine? I’m not sure. Perhaps director Steve Pink had compromising pictures of them. Perhaps writers Josh Heald, Sean Anders and John Morris were related to the people involved. That’s the only explanation I’ve got. As it is, Steve Pink isn’t using any of the actors in remotely interesting ways and quite simply, the movie isn’t funny. As well, the soundtrack is particularly intrusive as the blaring '80s music seems to be one of the few ways – outside characters saying it and walking by Winterfest '86 signs around the resort – that the director thinks to remind the viewers of the time change.

This is “guy humor” at the very worst: a string of drunken, promiscuous episodes that are punctuated with swearing going nowhere. I can think of no reason to see this one and I’m actually astonished I’ve almost sat through the entire thing and that I watched it a second time!

For other comedies, please check out my reviews of:
Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home
The Tooth Fairy
Easy A

1.5/10

For other film reviews, please visit my index page by clicking here!

© 2010 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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