A Perfect Song Kicks The Mediocre Turbulent Indigo Up A Notch!

The Good: "The Sire Of Sorrow," Lyrics, Moments of voice
The Bad: Generic overproduced quality to much of the album, Musically boring.
The Basics: Joni Mitchell creates a good, if not mind-blowing album with Turbulent Indigo, a slower, sadder album saved by one truly depressing song.


Poor Joni Mitchell. That's not entirely true, she's richer in many ways than me, but poor Joni Mitchell that as I've been listening to her works, I can't seem to find anything I'd really strongly recommend. She's a great songwriter, but her music on her early albums and her vocals are so limited that it makes it hard to recommend any of her albums I've thus heard. Then, I went to some of her later works, including Turbulent Indigo and whatever that newer one is that I have on in the car (yeah, review pending. :) ). Where Mitchell's early works are simple and unimaginative musically and vocally contrasting brilliant poetry, Mitchell's later works seem to be very much lyrically as powerful, but as vocally boring and overproduced in contrast to her prior stark sound.

So, after my third listen of Turbulent Indigo, I was prepared to write another review of a mediocre album and this time have the fortitude to actually not recommend it. Two listens later, I was distraught and driving (always a good combination!) and I actually heard the final track on the album. There are moments that a song can resonate so powerfully in one's life that it changes everything. And "The Sire Of Sorrow (Job's Sad Song)" has become that for me. There are albums where they are average but the strength of one song can make it something better. In my pantheon and rating system, that is an extraordinarily rare thing, but Turbulent Indigo is one of them.

With ten tracks clocking in at a total of 43:02, Turbulent Indigo struck me immediately with its poetic title and the richness of sound compared to the earlier works of Joni Mitchell. To leap from the early works to this 1994 album, is quite something, but it's just how I received the albums. Written entirely by Joni Mitchell, she provides the primary vocals on all ten songs. As well, she plays guitar, piano and keyboards as well as percussion on some of the tracks. She takes a producing credit on the album and it won her a Grammy, so I think it's a fair assessment to say that this is very much the musical vision of Joni Mitchell.

And it is good.

But it's also not the album that is going to light the world on fire and I'm actually somewhat surprised it won the Pop album of the year for 1994.

Lyrically, Turbulent Indigo is an album that may be judged by its title. Isn't Turbulent Indigo a great, poetic title? Mitchell utilizes wonderful diction not only in the titles, but in the songs. With lines like, "You snipe so steady / You snub so snide / So ripe and ready / To diminish and deride! / You're so quick to condescend / My opinionated friend / All you deface, all you defend / Is just a borderline" ("Borderline") she illustrates an ability to articulate complex ideas using complex phrases not frequently found in pop-rock music. "Borderline," which is a very repetitive song is saved from the frequent mentions of its title by the incredible vocabulary and message between refrains.

Turbulent Indigo is an album that is a lot more philosophical than narrative; unlike many of Joni Mitchell's works that are musical stories with a protagonist and a plotline to follow, Turbulent Indigo is much more about the poetics. It is a collection of thoughts put to music. For sure, there are stories, in fact, most are presented with a microcosm for the point that she's trying to make - like "The Magdalene Laundries" and "Sex Kills" - but the stories are more a collection of references as opposed to straightforward linear narratives like her songs that were character names on her earlier albums.

She tackles environmental calamities and current events on songs like "Sex Kills," laments about the draconian conditions of homes for unwed mothers on "The Magdalene Laundries," and tackles spousal abuse with "Not To Blame." She has a captivating series of poems on Turbulent Indigo and the title of the album wonderfully prepares the listener for the experience. In fact, the only truly poetically lame aspect of Turbulent Indigo are the titles. I once wrote of Heather Nova's album Storm (reviewed here!) that the titles were obvious and basically come up in the songs as exactly what you would expect the title of the song to be. Poetically, it is disappointing. Mitchell does that with "Turbulent Indigo;" most of the songs have the obvious title.

And then there is "The Sire Of Sorrow (Job's Sad Song)." And damn. That's a song you don't want to hear on your worst day because it'll inform you that you're in exactly the place Man is meant to be. It is powerful, depressing, dark and sad and scary and wonderful. Seriously, I wish I could just post the lyrics here and everyone who read them would say "I need to hear that song" and either go out and buy the album or legally download the song. Mitchell deserves money for that song! I've chosen to illustrate how great the song is with this passage from it, though: "Once I was blessed; I was awaited like the rain / Like eyes for the blind, like feet for the lame / Kings heard my words, and they sought out my company / But now the janitors of shadowland flick their brooms at me / Oh you tireless watcher! what have I done to you? / That you make everything I dread and everything I fear come true" ("The Sire Of Sorrow (Job's Sad Song)"). And no, Mitchell's brilliance extends to there being no catharsis from the sorrow. It is a truly wrenching song.

Unfortunately, it reveals some of the problems with Turbulent Indigo as an album ("The Sire Of Sorrow (Job's Sad Song)" is a perfect song. Absolutely perfect.) and they are all musical. "The Sire Of Sorrow (Job's Sad Song)" sounds like "Borderline," and "How Do You Stop." Turbulent Indigo, the track, has a lot in common with the slower "Not To Blame" and the entire album has a richly produced, generic adult pop-rock sound. So while the albums are no longer Mitchell's voice right in front of the lone guitar for that late '60s folk-rock sound, it has the generic smoky club-produced sound to it that seems to capture a lot of more mature artists.

There is a richness of bass, for example, deeper chords that are not present in earlier works but appear on virtually every track. The best way to phrase this problem is this way: if the earlier albums are too empty with too much space and not enough sound, Turbulent Indigo seems afraid of silence. Deathly afraid of a moment without multiple levels of music.

In fact, the closest to a quiet song on the album is "Last Chance Lost," which featured a contemplatively picked guitar and Mitchell's voice with minimal other instruments. And in contrast, it feels a bit boring alongside the other songs. There's little balance on this album and the result is mostly a bigger sound to the album, yet all of the songs are slower and could easily be characterized as adult contemporary. I doubt this would light the world of many young people on fire.

This may seem a weird complaint, much like the way others did not like Dar Williams' more musically rich End Of The Summer (reviewed here!) because it departed from a more simple musical style. In the case of Turbulent Indigo, the problem truly is that the sound of the album is strangely homogenous and it is somewhat musically boring as a result. And none of the tracks actually shout out "I'm different!" by the music (which is probably why it took me so long to find that perfect song nestled at the end of the album).

What Mitchell has is a great voice. She is able to traverse from soprano to tenor and she does it just fine. On Turbulent Indigo, she carries herself mostly as a smoky-voiced alto and she does not deviate from that sound much on the album. The songs all fall within a pretty standard range and, like the music being somewhat homogenous, hearing Mitchell's slow, clear voice track to track becomes more expected than extraordinary. She is good and her voice is melodic, but this album does not challenge her range any.

But it is worth a listen and that one song seriously makes it worth the buy. Anyone looking for contemplative, well-lyricked music will find Turbulent Indigo to be a good album, and a great album for keeping one in a funk if they're in one. It's not a happy album as it presents deeper songs of personal tragedy and misfortune, but it does set out to do what it promises:

It is turbulent and it'll make or keep one blue.

The best track is the perfect song "The Sire Of Sorrow (Job's Sad Song)," the weak link is the dippy and repetitive "Yvette In English."

For other Artist Of The Month works, be sure to visit my reviews of:
The Collection - Alanis Morissette
50 Greatest Hits - Reba McEntire
Western Wall: The Tucson Sessions - Linda Rondstadt

8/10

Check out how this album stacks up against others I have reviewed by visiting my Music Review Index Page where the albums are organized from best to worst!

© 2014, 2008 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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No, Stan Lee’s Cameo Is Not The High Point Of “T.R.A.C.K.S.”!

The Good: Fast-moving plot, Fun narrative technique, Coulson and May’s characters
The Bad: Hinges on reversals that seem predictable for genre fans.
The Basics: In a repetitive story told from different perspectives of Agents on the S.H.I.E.L.D. team, “T.R.A.C.K.S.” cleverly details how a mission to get closer to S.H.I.E.L.D.’s main adversary goes horribly wrong.


Repetitive narratives are a tough thing for television to pull off. Most shows don’t even attempt it because it is tough to pull off well. Star Trek: The Next Generation did it surprisingly well with “Cause And Effect” (reviewed here!), but even that episode holds up less well over repeated viewings over the years. Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D. attempted the feat with its latest episode, “T.R.A.C.K.S.” To its credit, “T.R.A.C.K.S.” might tell a story repetitively, but it works very hard to do it from different perspectives so it does not feel as repetitive as it actually is.

“T.R.A.C.K.S.” works best for those already watching Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D., despite that fact that it has the appearance of being a bottle episode. The episode references virtually all of the prior episodes of the season, so it actually is one of the more subtle serialized episodes yet produced. Moreover, “T.R.A.C.K.S.” leads up to an event that I have been hoping for – a character’s death – but in such a way that the survival or inevitable return of the character is virtually assured. Like Star Trek II: The Wrath Of Khan’s (reviewed here!) use of a Vulcan mind-meld to set up Spock’s resurrection, “T.R.A.C.K.S.” seems less audacious or surprising than fans of the series might hope. The concept of death in the Marvel Universe has not actually been dealt with in the Avengers side of the franchise – in fact Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D. undermines any potential significance of deaths in the Marvel Cinematic Universe by resurrecting Agent Coulson. So, when the near-death comes in “T.R.A.C.K.S.,” there is less of a sense of permanence (or potential for permanence) than fans of Joss Whedon’s other works - “T.R.A.C.K.S.” is not “Hero” or “Seeing Red.”

“T.R.A.C.K.S.” picks up almost immediately after “Seeds” (reviewed here!) and those who have not seen “Seeds” are unlikely to appreciate where the episode begins as Quinn – who is the recurring villain working for the mysterious Clairvoyant – is hunted by the Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D.

Opening with the hunt for Ian Quinn, S.H.I.E.L.D. is dispatched to Italy where they believe Quinn will be taking possession of a Cybertech Technologies shipment. The Agents board a train to tag the merchandise Quinn is expecting. When they realize they are made, Coulson and Wade jump off the train and Quinn’s security team turn the train invisible with the rest of the team aboard. Investigating after getting off the train, Wade and Coulson realize that May is no longer on the train and their team will not be rescued by her.

May’s perspective reveals how she got off the train and what actually happened to Coulson and Wade. A new weapon, much like the nighty-night gun was used (in the form of a grenade) and those afflicted lose time and are frozen. Aboard the train, Simmons is attacked in such a way and separated from Skye and Fitz. Following the tracker, Skye and Fitz discover Quinn’s lair. Skye finds Mike Peterson and watches as he is altered using advanced cybernetics by Quinn. Now a cyborg, Peterson’s allegiances are tested and one of the Agents is shot and left near death.

“T.R.A.C.K.S.” has a number of decent moments, moving the series forward exceptionally well. Stan Lee makes his inevitable cameo and it is appropriately amusing. Fortunately, though, that is not the exceptional aspect of the episode. In one of the first perspective changes, Ward and Coulson make it back to the plane and when they do, they discover just how much they rely upon Simmons and Fitz. Watching Coulson and Ward using the holographic generator is brilliantly light before the episode goes dark.

The serialized nature of the plot is significant. Coulson addresses the fact that May admitted to him his relationship with Ward and one of the best lines of the episode has to be Coulson pointing out that Ward should start calling his relationship sex if that’s actually all it is. Similarly, viewers of only this episode will not truly recognize the significance of Skye asking about a person being an 0-8-7. Mike Peterson’s return and the tragic nature of it also lacks punch for those who only watch “T.R.A.C.K.S.” That said, those who have a passion for Marvel Comics will appreciate Peterson’s transformation and the hope that his new evil alter-ego might make for a significant crossover in any of the upcoming Marvel films could truly tie the television series to the film franchise in a meaningful way.

The other thing that sets “T.R.A.C.K.S.” apart from many of the other episodes of Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D. is the consistency of the acting. All of the actors in “T.R.A.C.K.S.” live up to their potential. Clark Gregg and Grant Ward dominate the little moments, while J. August Richards, Ming-Na Wen and Chloe Bennett do the big emotional portrayals for the episode. The episode actually has all of the players apparently (finally) completely comfortable with their characters and utilized well in their roles. Outside one delivery of medical technobabble delivered unfortunately stiffly near the episode's climax, the acting is flawless. In fact, Elizabeth Henstridge gives one of her funniest, most charismatic performances when Simmons details the extensive backstory she came up for for her alias on the train. Using her well - as opposed to just delivering technical exposition - is a nice change.

As odd as it might seem, “T.R.A.C.K.S.” might be the essential episode of Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D. so far. If the remainder of the season keeps the momentum created by “T.R.A.C.K.S.,” it might just be enough to salvage the first season!

For other shows with actual significant character deaths, please visit my reviews of:
Game Of Thrones - Season Three
“Skin Of Evil” - Star Trek: The Next Generation
“Becoming, Part 2” - Buffy The Vampire Slayer

[Knowing that single episodes are an inefficient way to get episodes, it's worth looking into Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D. - The Complete First Season on DVD or Blu-Ray, which is also a better economical choice than buying individual episodes. Read my review of the debut season here!
Thanks!]

8.5/10

For other television reviews, please visit my Television Review Index Page for an organized listing!

© 2014 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Holiday Clearance: Nature Valley Limited Edition Pumpkin Pie Granola Thins Disappoint!

The Good: Does not taste bad, Healthy, Affordable
The Bad: Does not taste at all like Pumpkin Pie, Not at all filling
The Basics: The Nature Valley Granola Thins Pumpkin Pie crispy squares are an all-around disappointment, though they are pretty healthy.


Whenever I buy a snack on clearance, I immediately feel either excited or some sense of understanding. Most of the local stores that have a clearance rack clearance food only when the product goes out of season. Having been eating healthy with my wife with the Nature Valley Granola Thins Peanut Butter crispy squares (reviewed here!), I thought I would grab the Nature Valley Granola Thins Pumpkin Pie crispy squares when they went out of season after Thanksgiving. Sadly, the Pumpkin Pie Granola Thins were clearance equally for being unimpressive as for the change in season.

Basics

Nature Valley Granola Thins Pumpkin Pie crispy squares, for those who are not familiar with them, are multigrain granola bar blocks. General Mills has marketed their Granola Thins line as an alternative to full granola bars. The Nature Valley Granola Thins Pumpkin Pie crispy squares are individually-wrapped granola treats.

Nature Valley Granola Thins Pumpkin Pie crispy squares come individually wrapped in a box of ten. The standard size box that I have found is 6 oz. The Granola Thins are almost a square approximately 2 1/4" on each side up to 5/16" thick. While I usually rail against the environmental impact of such things, it is hard to imagine that the Nature Valley Granola Thins Pumpkin Pie crispy squares without their wrappings. Unwrapped, these look like granola bars that have been frosted on one side.

Ease Of Preparation

Nature Valley Granola Thins Pumpkin Pie crispy squares are simple to enjoy; all you need do it open the box and unwrap the crispy squares! There is no trick to eating Nature Valley Granola Thins Pumpkin Pie crispy squares; they are a snack that is ready to go from the box to the mouth.

Taste

Nature Valley Granola Thins Pumpkin Pie crispy squares smell very much like Pumpkin Pie. The scent is not as robust as virtually any other pumpkin pie flavored product. This surprised me because the spices in pumpkin pie are not too different from those of granola bars, so it seemed like it would be an easy transition.

On the tongue, Nature Valley Granola Thins Pumpkin Pie crispy squares have an entirely sugary and sweet flavor when the frosting side is placed down on the tongue. As the frosting wears off the dry, cinnamon flavor of the granola bar comes through. There is almost no flavor of nutmeg and there is no clove flavor in these Granola Thins. These do not actually taste at all like Pumpkin Pie; in fact, when I was eating one of these and kissed my wife, she asked where I got the Peanut Butter granola bar!

The Nature Valley Granola Thins Pumpkin Pie crispy squares have a very dry aftertaste that does not fade for quite some time and tastes a little sweet, like honey. Otherwise, these Granola Thins just dry out the mouth.

Nutrition

Nature Valley Granola Thins Pumpkin Pie crispy squares are actually not as bad on the health scale as most sweet or salty snacks are. Given that the ingredients are led by whole grain oats, sugar, and vegetable oils, it might surprise salty snack eaters to learn how generally good these granola snacks are. These have a shelf life of at least half a year, though the box we bought in November would have expired in late 2014.

Each .6 ounce (17 gram) serving of Nature Valley Granola Thins Pumpkin Pie crispy squares has 80 calories, thirty of which come from fat. There is less than a gram of dietary fiber. While there are 4.5 grams of fat and a gram of protein, there is a disproportionately high 70 mg of sodium, which represents 3% of one's RDA of sodium. There are a smattering of vitamins and minerals, but nothing significant and 11 grams of carbohydrates. There is a dietary note that the Nature Valley Granola Thins Pumpkin Pie crispy squares includes peanut, soy, egg, milk, and several types of nut ingredients, which prevents them from being Vegan compliant or Gluten-free.

Storage/Clean-up

Kept in their wrappers, Nature Valley Granola Thins Pumpkin Pie crispy squares will remain fresh for a while and as long as the wrappers are sealed, one suspects they will last indefinitely before getting stale. I've never had to deal with issues of freshness for my Nature Valley Granola Thins Pumpkin Pie crispy squares.

Cleanup is simple as well. Nature Valley Granola Thins Pumpkin Pie crispy squares are a dry food and thus leave no mess behind. The Pumpkin Pie frosting coating on the bottom melts pretty easily and these might leave crumbs behind, but they are not excessively messy. The frosting may be easily washed off.

Overall

Nature Valley Granola Thins Pumpkin Pie crispy squares are a healthy snack, but one that does not taste at all like pumpkin pie, making it disappointing.

For other snack foods, check out my reviews of:
Marathon Smart Stuff Crunchy Chocolate Crisp Snack Bar
Sheila G's Salted Caramel Brownie Brittle
PB Crave Coco Bananas Peanut Butter

2/10

For other food and drink reviews, please click here to visit my index page!

© 2014 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Time Loops And Pointless Parties: +1 Is Unimpressive.

The Good: Moments of performance, Elements of the concept, Moments of direction
The Bad: Lascivious direction, Continuity/concept issues, Most of the character aspects
The Basics: The independent science fiction film +1 finds a whole bunch of teenage partygoers repeating time.


I like science fiction and I get a kick out of checking out independent science fiction films. Sometimes, though, there is a reason indie sci-fi movies do not break out. Some of the works, like Snow Queen (reviewed here!) are pathetically low-budget and have severe licensing issues. +1, though, seems like it is conceptually flawed and populated by virtually unknown young actors. Instead of being a high concept film that has some execution problems, +1 has some serious issues when it starts to try to explain itself. The result is a movie that jumbles teen melodrama, science fiction and really dumb party movie.

Unfortunately, the really dumb party movie is the dominant film genre for most of +1. When the movie, which features repeating time loops, tries to have drunk teenagers explain metaphysics, temporal mechanics, and philosophy, it treads into a completely ridiculous place and it transitions poorly from teen party movie (like Project X, reviewed here!) into clunky science fiction/horror.

Opening with David paying his girlfriend, Jill, a visit at her college for a fencing match, David stupidly kisses the young woman who beat Jill in her match. As David commiserates with Teddy about his mistake and finds himself blocked by Jill on social networking sites, a meteor crashes to Earth nearby. As the meteor spreads some sort of energy along the power lines, David and Teddy walk over to the biggest party of the year. There, David tries to find Jill (who is supposedly blowing every guy she sees) and Teddy meets Melanie, who surprises him by being willing to sleep with him. Outside, Kyle (a weed dealer who has been kept out of the party) and Bonnie witness an anomaly at the power line, which sends Bonnie running away. When the power goes out after Teddy and Melanie have sex and Jill rejects David, the power returns . . . and the party has some additional guests. Teddy finds himself shocked to have another Melanie in bed with him (the one he just had sex with is in the shower) and Dave witnesses one Kyle killing another version of himself.

Quickly realizing – by observing other versions of themselves downstairs – that time is somehow repeating itself – Teddy, David, and their wallflower friend Allison try desperately to figure out what is going on and to keep the replicated versions of the partygoers from themselves (whatwith most of the guests having moved to a point outside where they are dancing and watching two strippers perform). David uses the opportunity to replay his conversation with Jill, this time saying all the things he knows she wants to hear, while Teddy gets curious and looks in on the two Melanies and his alternate self. Allison reacts differently to being bullied by dumping a drink on the mean girl who set her up to be embarrassed the first time through. But when the alternates abruptly vanish, then reappear from a point later on in the timestream (Teddy and Melanie, for example, are talking when all of a sudden alternate versions of themselves are mid-coitus elsewhere in the same room), Teddy begins to fear what the consequences of the alternates will be. After convincing the others to move to the boathouse, an Alternate Teddy incites fear into the partygoers and some of the teens begin to kill their alternates. With David trying desperately to prevent Jill from hooking up with Steve, the rest of the partygoers lapse into fear over what will happen when their alternates return next.

The element of +1 that works best is the concept that David actually desperately wants to make things right with Jill. His sense of loss and loneliness is palatable throughout. Also fairly clever is Allison’s attempt to befriend herself and avoid all of the ensuing chaos.

The direction is also good, except for the fact that director Dennis Iliadis spends most of the time making a dumb teen party movie. That means a throbbing soundtrack (part of which is actually relevant to the characters understanding the time loop) and slow pans over a lot of half-naked young women. Iliadis is devoted to doing what virtually every party movie director has done which is to use the camera in a way that feels entirely exploitative; it’s not artful the way he drags the camera in for close-ups of bouncing breasts and bare butts.

A number of specific elements utterly fail in +1. Foremost in my mind is Iliadis casting twins Colleen and Suzanne Dengel as Allison and her alternate. In addition to forcing the twins into a kiss (which is pretty perverse, despite the odd porn acceptance of such things as somehow not-quite incest, though it is . . . ), Iliadis proves he’s a pretty inept director. Instead of forcing an actress to play off herself and have a real acting and directing challenge, Iliadis takes what seems like the easy way out. Unfortunately, the longer they are on screen, the more evident the differences between Colleen and Suzanne become. They might be identical twins, but when they are face to face, it is painfully obvious they are not the same person and for the story of +1, that’s actually a problem.

The big problem on the character front comes with Teddy. Teddy convinces everyone to move to the boat house and he’s on to the right idea. Why he doesn’t have everyone move again (like back into the house or to leave the party and head home to prevent alternates from ever catching up with themselves) is less of a mystery and more of a braindead plothole. Teddy finally has everyone convinced (and most worried) so the party need not generate into a crowded, mutant fight scene.

The main performers are generally good, even though Rhys Wakefield is mostly asked to stare longingly after Ashley Hinshaw’s Jill as David. Logan Miller does fine with the technobabble and the Dengels are good, despite not being given a truly substantive role(s?). While Natalie Hall may have been cast largely for how she looks naked, she plays off Miller well-enough to be more watchable than eye rolling.

Such, however, is not the case for +1. The long build-up to the first duplication does not pay off in an interesting-enough way for the viewer to believe it was worth it. The set-up for a potentially bigger and less engaging sequel seems pitiful and the issues (how do the strippers on stage know something is wrong when none of the partygoers but Alternate Teddy do?!) pop up almost immediately. The writing was not careful enough to make +1 truly compelling, so Dennis Iliadis fleshes the movie out with boob shots and drunken revelry, which is not enough to pass for entertaining.

For other science fiction films with young protagonists, please visit my reviews of:
Cloverfield
Skyline
Chronicle

3.5/10

For other film reviews, please check out my Movie Review Index Page for an organized listing!

© 2014 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Higher Cost Of Ownership, Weaker Coffee, Why The Mr. Coffee BVMC-SJX33GT 12-Cup Programmable Coffee Maker Is Average At Best.

The Good: Brews coffee exceptionally fast, Dripless function works well, Cool programmable features, Water filter is neat
The Bad: Time-out function, Different proportion of coffee to make a decent pot, Higher cost of use, Messy basket style
The Basics: A mediocre coffee maker, my wife’s new Mr. Coffee BVMC-SJX33GT Coffee Maker leaves me unimpressed.


When one has been married long enough, one learns to recognize the difference between gifts we are given out of love from our partner and gifts our partner gives us to replace the stuff they do not like around. My wife, for example, is an incredible professional server in addition to being an artist. And yet, she had a terribly unfortunate habit of spilling coffee on herself whenever using the carafe that came with the Hamilton Beach Coffee Maker (reviewed here!) that I brought with me to our marriage. It is probably my favorite coffee maker. My wife, however, was sick of burning herself on coffee when pouring it, so one night, she decided a charm offensive. She came home from the store with groceries and proudly said, “I picked up coffee filters for us,” and promptly presented me with a 200 pack of basket-style coffee filters. I frowned noticeably (we’ve been married for more than four years, she knows the right type of filters for our coffee maker!) and said, “I’m sorry, dear, these aren’t the right filters.” To which, my wife enthusiastically responded, “They are now!” and she whipped out the box containing our brand new Mr. Coffee 12-cup Programmable Coffee Maker (model #BVMC-SJX33GT). I’ve got to give my wife a lot of credit for presentation and for taking the initiative (she said for years she wanted a new coffee maker and she asked me months before what one I would like . . .I just – purposely – never got around to the research needed to answer her question well).

However, while I usually feel bad when my wife presents me with such a thoughtful gift and I don’t like it and I inevitably review it with a mediocre or bad rating, I feel no such guilt in this case: there are serious problems with the Mr. Coffee BVMC-SJX33GT Coffee Maker and while it was presented as a gift to me, it was very clearly a gift to my wife (and she has not burned herself once on spilling coffee since we put my coffee maker into storage and started using the Mr. Coffee BVMC-SJX33GT Coffee Maker on a daily basis.

The Mr. Coffee BVMC-SJX33GT Coffee Maker is a beautiful-looking 12-cup coffee maker and while that means a lot of coffee for parties, it’s a day's supply for my wife and I. The twelve cup pot provides about six mugs full of coffee, which is nice for those who like to drink coffee, like my wife and I.

One of the key selling points of the Mr. Coffee BVMC-SJX33GT Coffee Maker is the fact that it has a water filter inside the coffee maker. While I always use water filtered through my Brita Water Pitcher (reviewed here!) to prevent accumulation of hard water build-ups inside the unit anyway, the idea that there is less chlorine in our coffee is a nice one. However, in addition to having an extra step when making coffee, this means the cost of ownership of the Mr. Coffee BVMC-SJX33GT Coffee Maker is higher than with the average coffee maker; one is required to buy filters once a month in order to utilize the water filter function and at $4/ea, the filters are one of two additional expenses for the coffee maker that make it less of a value to use.

The black plastic and chrome base of the coffee maker is an rectilinear cube shape that is 12 3/4" tall, 8” wide and 9 1/4" deep, so this is not the ideal coffee maker for those who have space at a premium. However, it's a great coffee maker for families, college students and those who want a lot of coffee. I have mine right in our stainless steel section of our kitchen and it looks great there among our other stainless steel appliances.

All of the controls for the Mr. Coffee BVMC-SJX33GT Coffee Maker are on the front, top, center of the coffee maker, above the coffee pot itself. The controls include a power button, the brew delay control buttons, the brew strength button (which I always turn to “Strong,” though it does not seem to have much of an effect on the quality of the coffee the unit produces), and the controls for adjusting the clock and programming the timer function. Above the time controls is a little digital clock panel that is zeroed out every time the coffee maker is unplugged.

Operating is simple; I hit power and adjust the brew strength to “Strong” and the coffee maker almost instantly begins percolating. Usually, it takes fifteen seconds for the unit to warm up and about thirty seconds before the first drops start hitting the pot. The first cup of coffee is usually ready within a minute of the first drops hitting the pot. The whole twelve cup pot takes about three minutes to brew up and it is kept well-heated by the warmer below for two hours.

Herein lies the first major problem with the Mr. Coffee BVMC-SJX33GT Coffee Maker: it makes coffee fast, but it makes a shit cup of coffee. I write that because I have an objective standard; I have two open containers of coffee that I made with my Hamilton Beach coffee maker and now with my new Mr. Coffee BVMC-SJX33GT Coffee Maker. I was raised by a world-class cook (he seriously studied under some amazing culinary experts after being a cook in the Navy) and I grew up on a simple formula that never failed me until now: to make coffee, you need one Tablespoon of ground coffee for every two cups of water you put in the coffee maker. It’s a simple 1:2 formula that has had me making great cups of coffee for three decades. Mr. Coffee begs to differ. In the manual for the Mr. Coffee BVMC-SJX33GT Coffee Maker, they provide a very different series of calculations. For a four cup pot of coffee being brewed in the Mr. Coffee BVMC-SJX33GT Coffee Maker, they insist one needs 3 Tbs. coffee. For a 12 cup pot, 9 Tbs. The thing is, even adjusting from a 1:2 to a 4:3 ratio and using the “Strong” brewing option on the Mr. Coffee BVMC-SJX33GT Coffee Maker does not yield a cup of coffee nearly as strong as I - and my wife – usually like. With a better-designed coffee maker, one that takes a little longer with percolating the coffee, one may easily get a stronger cup of coffee using less coffee. Changing to a 4:3 water to coffee ratio dramatically increases the cost of use of the Mr. Coffee BVMC-SJX33GT Coffee Maker relative to other coffee makers I have used for my entire life!

The no-drip function works rather well. When the pot is removed from the base, the flow of coffee stops and so long as one pours only a single cup of coffee, it is easy to replace the pot and there is no dripping or spillage that will occur. However, because of the speed of the water hitting the basket and filtering through the coffee grounds, trying to fill more than one cup of coffee while the pot is brewing usually leads to the unit overflowing the basket at the top!

Those familiar with my reviews might know that energy efficiency is very important to me. Energy conservation is so important to me that I always unplug this coffee maker when I'm done using it because I don't want to pay for the energy drain of the clock on the coffee maker (I am that serious about energy conservation!). This coffee maker has a function that is great for energy conservation, but a pain in the butt to those milking a pot of coffee throughout the day. After two hours, the warming base automatically shuts off. This prevents fires, conserves energy and annoys those of us who have to then reheat a cup of coffee when we come back to the pot four hours after it was first brewed. I've found no way to shut this particular function off.

The Mr. Coffee BVMC-SJX33GT Coffee Maker is extraordinarily easy to clean. Both the carafe and the brewing basket (where the coffee filters go) are dishwasher safe and the warming pad wipes clean whenever I spill anything. The cup marks on the base are easy to read when filling the reservoir for making coffee and the cup marks on the pot are easy to read as well.

Also, this coffee maker has a wonderful timer function. If you wish to wake up to the smell of fresh-brewing coffee, you may set the unit up the night before and program it to activate the next morning! It's important to note that this only works if one remembers to put water in the reservoir the night before. Otherwise, the coffee maker turns on and nothing happens. Properly programmed, though, this coffee maker may have the pot ready when you wake up and that is nice for those who don’t like trying to pour and measure while still tired.

Unfortunately, the few benefits are nowhere near enough to offset the detractions. The Mr. Coffee BVMC-SJX33GT Coffee Maker is a fast but messy (when disposing of the soggy paper filter from the basket) coffee maker that yields an unfortunately weak cup of coffee and does so at a greater expense than other, better-designed coffee makers in the same price range. Still, for those who want filtered-water coffee, weak but fast, this might be the coffee maker for you!

For other coffee-related kitchen appliances, please check out my reviews of:
Cuisinart Grind Central Coffee Grinder
Hamilton Beach E160B Coffee Grinder
Cuisinart Supreme Grind Coffee Grinder

4/10

For other appliance and tool reviews, visit my Home And Garden Product Review Index Page for an organized listing!

© 2014 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Departures And Arrivals Make For A Satisfying Fourth Season Of Modern Family.

The Good: Very funny, Decent performances, Interesting characters
The Bad: The series is becoming somewhat formulaic, Little enduring from the season.
The Basics: Modern Family Season Four is very funny, but little of it sticks with the viewer after the episodes are done.


When it comes to seasons of television, I find that one of the components that matters quite a bit to me when it comes to deciding to purchase a DVD or Blu-Ray boxed set is the season’s rewatchability (which makes quite a bit of sense). In recent years, there have been a few television series that I have enjoyed watching, but that I am not convinced have a timeless quality that makes me want to add them to my permanent collection. Few shows these days are both rewatchable and quotable to the extent that I enjoy watching them over and over again and can foresee doing so for years to come. In fact, only 30 Rock (“I want to go to there!”) and Happy Endings (“Shut your stupid whore mouth!”) come instantly to mind. While Modern Family seems like it would be a natural addition to my collection, especially given how much my wife and I love Frasier (reviewed here!), I remain on the fence about it as a part of my permanent library.

The fourth season of Modern Family is good, but it is not exceptional and while it has heartwarming moments, some of the humor is a bit more predictable than in prior seasons. The characters continue to develop, but the serialized elements in the season are understated – they focus almost entirely on Gloria’s pregnancy, the house that Cam and Claire are trying to flip, and Haley’s departure for and return from college. The season also is notably lacking in exceptional lines that make one feel like the characters and season have been defined. Instead, this feels like largely like a very typical sitcom . . . with performers who are able to get the most out of the average lines. More than in some of the prior seasons, the actors noticeably set up the punchlines, as opposed to them feeling like they come organically. On the flip side, some of the series’ stars truly make their roles look effortless. As always, Ty Burrell, Jesse Tyler Ferguson, and Eric Stonestreet excel at playing their parts and making the season watchable and enjoyable. But, as my wife pointed out after Burrell landed a great deadpan in the Halloween episode, “If he [Ty Burrell] wasn’t on this, I’m not sure it would be worth watching.”

Following the realization that she is pregnant, Gloria struggles to find the best time to tell Jay. When Jay is abducted for his birthday, she finds her moment and she is thrilled when he is happy about the pregnancy. With the Pritchetts planning to make way for their new baby, the Dunphys deal with the emotional departure of Haley. With their oldest daughter headed off to college, Phil and Claire try to find a new balance and that leads Claire and Cameron to team up to restore and flip a house they bought (much to the chagrin of Phil and Mitchell).

But Haley’s absence is shortlived as she gets into trouble in college and leaves after only a few weeks. When she moves back home and has to do community service, the family’s dynamic is restored. With Gloria worried about how Manny will react to having a new brother, Cam and Mitch start teaching Lily about Vietnam . . . which she resists.

In the fourth season of Modern Family, most of the humor is based on deadpan deliveries and quick turns of phrase (“You're the kind of person who can be twice as scary without wearing any makeup.”). The situations in the fourth season are not particularly loaded with inherent humor – Jay sees the woman to whom he lost his virginity while on a trip to Florida and she doesn’t remember him, Phil gets stuck under a motorcycle, Alex tries to get a picture of Haley wherein Haley looks bad – but the show is funny for the lines, though many of those are very specific to the moments they are in (as opposed to usable catchphrases).

In the fourth season of Modern Family, the main characters include:

Jay Pritchett – Who is thrilled on New Year’s Eve to play cards with Billy Dee Williams. He is continually bugged by Phil, works to parent Manny and put up with Gloria’s pregnancy (and her family’s arrival after the baby is born),

Gloria – Goes somewhat crazy while pregnant. Still, she is very concerned about how Manny will go from being an only child to having to share her affections. In fact, it is such a concern to her that she tries to keep the baby, Fulgencio, in when she goes into labor on Manny’s birthday,

Manny – Suave as always, he tries to get a dramatic lead part in the school plays. However, he finds himself upstaged by the least likely source . . . Luke! Still, Manny helps Gloria come to terms with being pregnant and has his first kiss,

Mitch Pritchett – Gets over the prior season’s adoption failure with Cam and starts making new friends, including a lesbian couple whose son has a crush on Lily. He tries to be supportive of Cam with Cam going back to work and with Cam feeling distant from Lily, but finds it tough to keep quiet when Cam and Claire fix up a house they are trying to flip. He acts as lawyer for both Haley and Gloria,

Cameron – Goes back to work, this time as a music teacher. He actually connects with his students incredibly well and he and Mitch have a fun New Year’s out together. He and Mitch turn Lily into an over-competitive gymnast and he becomes obsessed with marrying Lily when Lily maries Mitch first,

Lily – Good for the shocking one-liners, she is growing up and gets into gymnastics. She learns her mother was not a princess and that the tooth fairy does not, traditionally, leave one hundred dollar bills for teeth,

Phil Dunphy – Writes down his Phil-osophies for Haley and continues to practice magic with Luke. Despite bonding with Luke, he seems to recognize that Luke is a budding psychopath. He tries to be a part of Jay’s life and ultimately beats him up at a kid’s birthday party. He gets into a conflict with Gil Thorpe over selling the house Claire and Cam want to flip,

Claire Dunphy – She is bored and takes on the project of flipping a house with Cam, despite them having very different visions on how to accomplish that. She feels vindicated when Haley realizes how hard it is to get respect from the family,

Haley – Goes to college and gets expelled when she falls on a police officer while fleeing a party drunk. She returns home and is distressed to have to share a room with Alex again. She plays the Tooth Fairy and helps Alex learn to flirt,

Alex – She begins to strike out on her own. While everyone is convinced her boyfriend is gay, she believes he is not. She develops a talent for music as part of a small band and helps Haley take care of Luke one night while their parents are out,

And Luke – Goes on his first date, not realizing that Phil and the girl’s mom were doing all the chatting online. He makes a transition from set painter to opera singer in the school play. He re-established order in everyone’s life through acts of revenge when Phil steps into Claire’s shoes and messes things up for all of the family members.

Ultimately, Modern Family Season Four is funny and thoroughly enjoyable when one is watching it, but it is not a season I found myself contemplating at all when it was done. The episodes are amusing and the characters are fun, but it’s hardly a timeless show and the fourth season of Modern Family treads closer to the average than the extraordinary.

For other shows from the 2012 – 2013 season, be sure to check out my reviews of:
The Big Bang Theory - Season Six
30 Rock - Season Seven
Revolution - Season 1
Parenthood - Season 4
Veep - Season 1
Game Of Thrones - Season 3
New Girl - Season 2
Happy Endings - Season 3
The Walking Dead - Season 3
Arrested Development - Season 4
House Of Cards - Season 1
True Blood - Season 5

6/10

For other television reviews, please visit my Movie Review Index Page for an organized listing!

© 2014 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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R.I.P. Philip Seymour Hoffman: A Late Quartet

The Good: Decent mood, Interesting character conflict, Good acting
The Bad: Erratic plotting, Mood gets oppressive at some points.
The Basics: A Late Quartet utilizes an impressive cast in an erratically presented narrative about the dissolution of a quartet of musicians who have been together for twenty-five years.


This morning, news broke early that actor Philip Seymour Hoffman had died. It was then that I realized that I have actually seen a pretty significant portion of his body of works. So, as I often do when a favorite actor of mine dies – or in the case of watching Havoc (reviewed here!) on the occasion of Anne Hathaway’s marriage – I sat down to watch a film with Philip Seymour Hoffman that I had not yet seen. I chose A Late Quartet and through it, I had a pair of revelations. The pleasant revelation was that, despite having seen a preview for A Late Quartet which made so many of the early scenes in the film feel familiar, A Late Quartet did not make me feel like I was watching any other movie. That is a pretty rare sensation for me. The specific plot of a dissolution of a mature group of adults felt, despite the thematic pressure to make a depressing film, remarkably fresh.

The other revelation for me was from Philip Seymour Hoffman. For all of my appreciation of Philip Seymour Hoffman and my appreciation for his extensive range as an actor, A Late Quartet made me realize (with the help of my wife’s observation) that I have absolutely no idea what the casting call for Philip Seymour Hoffman would be. “Frumpy b-lister needed for emotionally deep supporting role, must be able to wear sweatpants. A-list actors need not apply.” ? For all his power and range, Philip Seymour Hoffman was seldom challenged or expected to open or carry a film. A Late Quartet, in that way, might well be the quintessential role of his career: the film is about a string quartet and the balance between its members . . . and the imbalance created when one of the members plans to retire.

After twenty-five years together, the musicians in a string quartet find themselves divided on whether or not to play a particularly challenging piece by heart. The cellist, music teacher Peter Mitchell, finds himself during their first rehearsal, out of time with his hands not working as well as they need to. His doctor suspects he has Parkinson’s and he reluctantly informs the other members of the quartet that he will be leaving after the premiere concert of the current season. The perfectionist first violinist, Daniel Lerner, rides Juliette and Robert’s daughter Alexandra pretty hard in their session and Robert uses Peter’s Parkinson’s revelation as an opportunity to share the First Violin chair duties. Daniel rejects the idea of alternating the First Chair position and Juliette tells Daniel that if Peter leaves the quartet, she might be done with the Fugue. When Peter discovers that his handpicked choice to replace him in the Fugue String Quartet is not likely to be released easily from the trio she is in, the Fugue looks like it might fall apart.

In the ensuing collapse of the group, Robert cheats on Juliette with a flamenco dancer and Juliette calls him out on it right away. While Peter courts Nina to replace him, Daniel mentors Alexandra and Robert and Juliette wrestle with the fallout in their marriage. As they work up to their final performance, the members of the Fugue String Quartet reflect upon their lives together and as individuals and begin to question what the last twenty-five years have meant to each of them.

A Late Quartet is essentially a character study featuring five primary characters (the quartet acting as a character in and of itself). The film has more of a meandering quality than the epic The Red Violin (reviewed here!), but it has a similar intensity. While Robert’s interest in Pilar is entirely predictable and not at all frustrating through either its realization or the torsion it causes in the story, Alex’s obvious interest in the much older Daniel is predictable but brought to the forefront in a way that feels fresh. It is refreshing to see a movie where the reticent old man is not interested in (and, in fact, is revolted by) the advance of the woman young enough to be his daughter. So, when Robert implores Daniel to find his passion, that Daniel uses it as an excuse to give in to his repressed desire for Alex is completely disappointing. The only thing that redeems the otherwise insulting scene between Alex and Daniel is that Juliette, smartly, is realistically able to recognize Daniel’s car outside Alex’s apartment when she visits her daughter.

The refreshing aspect of A Late Quartet is that the predictable aspects make way for unpredictable elements. Daniel and Alex sleeping together leads to a particularly brutal and straightforward conversation between Alex and Juliette. While the scene is punctuated with one of the most foreseeable slaps in film history, A Late Quartet is filled with more moments that feel audacious than the ones that insult the viewer with their predictability. Most notably, A Late Quartet features characters who are actually refreshingly honest with one another. A Late Quartet does not hinge on plot revelations following characters doing horrible things; it is all about how the characters react to the way they treat one another. The film feels like a continuum; these characters have been wrestling with issues in their dynamics for years prior, not just during the events of the film.

On the performance front, A Late Quartet is exceptional. Philip Seymour Hoffman, Katherine Keener, and Christopher Walken all give their usual amazing performances. Hoffman is deep and conflicted as Robert, Keener is emotionally intelligent and articulate as Juliette, and Walken is alternately reserved and emotive as Peter. A Late Quartet might be the most significant role I have seen Mark Ivanir in and he is wonderful as Daniel. He has impressive range and the four members of the Quartet all realistically portray musicians in such a credible way that they seem like a perfectly viable and real musical group. Imogen Poots is good in the supporting role of Alex and there is not a poor moment of performance in all of A Late Quartet. Despite the emotional oppressiveness of A Late Quartet and the moments when the film seemed more familiar than challenging its conventions, I found myself wanting to see more with these performers in these roles.

More a celebration of mood and performance than a truly worthwhile story, A Late Quartet is a great way to eulogize the life of Philip Seymour Hoffman; there is abounding talent in the film, but the push over into enduring, undeniable greatness – the faith that the movie is going to resonate – is lacking. There is a passion and specific, worthwhile, clever bits, but it comes together in a way that makes it hard to define and call out, much like Philip Seymour Hoffman.

For other works with Philip Seymour Hoffman, please visit my reviews of:
The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
The Master
Moneyball
The Ides Of March
The Invention Of Lying
Charlie Wilson’s War
Mission: Impossible III
Capote
Strangers With Candy
Along Came Polly
Cold Mountain
The 25th Hour
Punch-Drunk Love
Almost Famous
State And Main
Magnolia
The Big Lebowski
Boogie Nights
Hard Eight

7.5/10

For other film reviews, please visit my Movie Review Index Page for an organized listing!

© 2014 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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A Rocky Start To The Reboot: “Storm Front” Opens The Fourth Season Of Star Trek: Enterprise!

The Good: Generally decent acting, Good costumes
The Bad: Lacking in character development,
The Basics: Stuck in an alternate timeline, Archer and the crew of the Enterprise tries to survive the destruction of the Expanse and a dramatically different Earth than they recall.


With the inevitable end of the third season of Star Trek: Enterprise with “Zero Hour” (reviewed here!), the long-serialized plot of Star Trek: Enterprise was resolved and left the show looking for a reboot. The fourth season was going to be a time of reboot and given where “Zero Hour” ended, the show was in a pretty deep pit that writer and new executive producer had to dig himself out of. The season premiere was the two-part “Storm Front” and given how so much of the fourth season was to be devoted to realigning the series with the rest of the Star Trek franchise, Manny Coto had three years of bad episodes to undo. To do that, he had to end the Temporal Cold War concept.

Unfortunately, the season premiere, “Storm Front” has so much to undo. Perhaps as a testament to how messed up the Temporal Cold War plotline was, “Storm Front” was forced to continue the Temporal Cold War with a previously-unseen alien race (though it was seen at the climax of the third season). The story is clearly an attempt to put a rest to the Temporal Cold War concept by putting the Enterprise crew in the middle of a time-altered storyline that will force some form of temporal realignment in a way that fixes issues that precede their arrival in the episode. Unfortunately, that means that whatever resolution “Storm Front” is going to bring about will have an external component that has nothing to do with the protagonists of the show. That makes for unfortunately uncompelling television.

With Trip and Mayweather being shot at by spitfires over San Francisco, the crew of Enterprise is left utterly bewildered. Archer wakes up to find himself in the custody of Nazis who think he is an American. At the Nazi headquarters, two aliens realize that Archer is a time-traveler and become concerned because he has been rescued by the Allies. Aboard the Enterprise, Mayweather realizes that the ship has returned to the past, but not the one they remember as there are attacks in Virginia that never occurred in World War II.

When a badly mutated and wounded Daniels appears in Sickbay, Phlox discovers the Temporal Agent is aged and de-aged irregularly, giving him less than a day to live. With Archer learning he is in 1944 Brooklyn, the aliens working with the Nazis try to convince the Nazis to build their futuristic weapons to solidify their advantage over the Allies. When Daniels reveals that the Temporal Cold War has erupted into a full-fledged conflict throughout time and space, the crew of the Enterprise believes it has no home to return to. While trying to repair the Enterprise, Tucker encounters Silik, who steals a shuttlepod. On Earth, Archer works to track down the aliens who are aiding the Nazis.

“Storm Front” has a distinct lack of character development. Captain Archer has spent the past year in a stressful situation day to day, is seriously wounded and yet he ends up in an entirely different place and time without any sense that he is shaken or truly affected by the events that preceded it. In fact, Archer’s presentation in “Storm Front” is very much a reflection of Scott Bakula’s performance. Bakula came back from his hiatus from Star Trek: Enterprise relaxed and refreshed. Unfortunately, that made Archer’s surprisingly laid-back and controlled manner in “Storm Front” seem utterly unrealistic.

In a similar way, Jolene Blalock is not only undone by the make-up (everyone on Enterprise was healed remarkably quickly from their near-complete disintegration in “Zero Hour”); she hardly seems as emotionally conflicted as T’Pol as she did in the prior season’s finale.

“Storm Front” is also loaded up with guest actors and guest characters that keep the focus more on the overall plot than on anything remotely akin to character development. The return of Silik and Daniels and the new enemy, Vosk, create yet another complicated time-travel/alternate universe scenario. Fortunately, given how muddied the plot is – Daniels declares that Vosk is the real enemy in the time war and that his people in the Federation in the future has been utterly defeated – the only way to restore the timeline is to completely undo the Temporal Cold War.

The episode is a long build-up to set up the goal of the second part. In fact, it is so convoluted that it is unclear why Alicia Travers dislikes Archer until the beginning of the next episode! Ultimately, the goal of “Storm Front” is an admirable (if belated and somewhat pointless) one, but it is executed in a mediocre way.

The biggest gaffe in “Storm Front:” Yet another previously unseen alien race is seen that should have had no real ability to reach Earth in the time period in which they are present. Vosk’s race is an uncompelling enemy because viewers have never seen him before and they have no viable belief that his race can succeed in rewriting the time line.

[Knowing that single episodes are an inefficient way to get episodes, it's worth looking into Star Trek: Enterprise - The Complete Fourth Season on DVD or Blu-Ray, which is also a better economical choice than buying individual episodes. Read my review of the final season here!
Thanks!]

For other works in which Tom Wright appears, please visit my reviews of:
World Trade Center
Barbershop
“Tuvix” - Star Trek: Voyager

3/10

For other Star Trek episode and movie reviews, please visit my Star Trek Review Index Page!

© 2014 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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The Unique Legacy Collection Figure, FA-4 Still Disappoints!

The Good: Great balance, Decent sculpt and coloring
The Bad: Poor articulation, Lack of accessories, No workable treads
The Basics: The Star Wars Legacy Collection FA-4 is, arguably, the grail of the new line, but it’s a pretty underwhelming figure with limited appeal.


Every Star Wars action figure line has a “grail figures.” The “grail” is usually underproduced and unique to the wave, like the Darth Malgus figure (reviewed here!) released in the Vintage Collection. For Amazon.com’s exclusive Legacy Collection line, the unique figure (outside the build-a-droid figure) was FA-4. FA-4 was Count Dooku’s droid from Attack Of The Clones and it’s surprising that Hasbro made the grail figure from one of the least recognizable characters from the least popular film in the franchise.

For those unfamiliar with the FA-4, it was the droid piloting Count Dooku’s shuttle at the climax of Attack Of The Clones (reviewed here!). It was the bronze and gray droid seen for only a few frames as Dooku was escaping Geonosis.

The 4" FA-4 figure is a cool-looking figure of a largely unrecognizable, CG-generated character that is not as sophisticated as it could be.

Basics

The FA-4 figure stands 3 1/4" tall and it is a thin robot with giant “feet.” The feet, which are at the bottom of the vaguely humanoid droid’s legs are made to look like they would allow the droid to roll around. This is where the sculpt is thoroughly unimpressive; the feet have texture for the tank-like treads on the feet, but the treads do not rotate or allow the figure to roll around.

That said, the rest of the sculpt for FA-4 is decent and its coloring is great. The character is cast in monotones, but it suits a clean droid. The copper/bronze portions of the droid are cast in a pearlescent plastic that makes it look like it is built of metal. Like many of the virtual characters from Star Wars made into action figures, the FA-4 figure has ridiculously thin arms and neck. Because FA-4 is based upon a briefly-seen subject, the sculpt is immaculate, but the detailing is minimal; the character was not given exceptional detailing, so the figure lacks it as well.

Accessories

The FA-4 is a droid that could have come with Dooku’s shuttle, but was made on its own. As such, it comes with no accessories outside the build-a-droid part. The FA-4 features the torso section of TC-70. The copper torso jointed and includes sculpted and coloring detailing for the wires in the stomach area. The torso looks exactly like what one expects of a Star Wars protocol droid. The torso has a ball joint so the chest and bottom section can move a bit. The torso section is the essential part of the Build-A-Droid figure; all other parts plug right into it.

Playability

The four inch toy line was designed for play and the FA-4 is fair on that front. The FA-4 has absolutely perfect balance, but somewhat limited poseability. The FA-4 is articulated at eight points, four of which are simple swivel joints! The FA-4 figure is articulated at the groin socket, shoulders, elbows, neck and head. The head is on a ball-and-socket joint. The elbows are both on hinge joints and the shoulders and groin socket have simple swivel joints which do all they truly need to do. This figure does not twist at the waist or have much in the way of lower body articulation.

This is one of the few figures in the Star Wars line that does not have a hole for the pegs found on playsets or vehicles, but that’s fine; it is incredibly stable as it is.

Collectibility

The FA-4 is part of the Legacy Collection with the build-a-droid figure that was released in 2013 exclusively through Amazon.com. The FA-4 was released with equal frequency as the rest of the line. Given how this figure is unique and includes the essential Build-A-Droid piece, it is already appreciating in value. Given how unremarkable and small the figure is, though, one suspects it is reaching its peak value now, making it a shaky investment figure.

Overview

FA-4 is a very basic and unimpressive droid figure, though one that is essential for collectors of Star Wars droids as there are no other figures quite like FA-4!

For other Star Wars droid figures, please check out my reviews of:
2013 Legacy Collection Battle Droid
Capture The Force #3 – Destroyer Droid
Saga Legends SL02 IG-88

4/10

For other Star Wars toy reviews, please check out my Star Wars Toy Review Index Page for an organized listing!

© 2014 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Classic Springsteen That Holds Up Today: Born To Run!

The Good: Lyrics, Instrumental accompaniment
The Bad: SHORT, Not the most imaginative vocals
The Basics: Born To Run still resonates after almost forty years!


My first conscious experience with Bruce Springsteen’s pre-‘80s works was actually a parody. Robert Wuhl used to sing his version of the song “Born To Run” during one of his comedy routines on New Jersey and I remember seeing that as a kid. So as I sit down now to listen to the album that is older than I am, Born To Run, I find myself frequently smiling irrationally even to some of the darker songs. Born To Run was Bruce Springsteen’s third album and it was his breakout; it remains one of the two seminal Bruce Springsteen albums, with just cause.

Almost forty years since its original release, Born To Run is probably the most famous working class hero album of Bruce Springsteen’s. While most of the songs have heavily political undertones, the album also has Springsteen singing about relationships. The impact of economics and relationships is poignant throughout Born To Run, even if Springsteen’s vocals are very safe for him and his established range.

With only eight songs, clocking out at 39:26, Born To Run is arguably most hampered by its short duration. Springsteen, as we know, has had something to say for quite some time and it’s hard to believe there was not additional audio material from producing Born To Run that could have been included when it was remastered for compact disc. That said, the album is a legitimate success for the content it possesses. Bruce Springsteen wrote all eight songs – both the lyrics and music. Springsteen also provides all of the lead vocals and plays instruments (usually guitars) on each track. As well, Springsteen was a co-producer on the album, so it is hard to argue that he was not able to present his distinct musical vision with Born To Run.

That musical vision is not hampered by Springsteen’s vocals, though Born To Run is hardly a great example of the range he actually possesses. Born To Run has Springsteen spending most of his time at the higher registers – not the falsettos he would eventually do, but the higher tenor range, as opposed to the lower, growling sound he would do in the 80’s – sounding more like a similar-era Bowie than the familiar (to a child of the 80s and 90s) Springsteen. That said, Springsteen illustrates pretty impressive lung capacity and he sings most of his songs very clearly so his lyrics may be easily understood.

Born To Run has Springsteen accompanied by guitars, organs, percussion, and bass. Instead of choosing between piano or guitar, Springsteen’s E Street Band accompanies him on both and the sound is much richer for what (lyrically) seems much more like a Folk album than a rock and roll outing. Springsteen and the E Street Band also mix up the sound by throwing in trumpets and the occasional brass instrument (as well as a violin) to shake things up auditorily. The result is actually an album with so much instrumental sound that it’s hard not to pick something new out of each listen (at least for the first eight spinnings like I went through!).

Lyrically, Born To Run is most made up of musical storysongs, like one gets from folk singers. Springsteen sings about American life and he does so with a vividness that is compelling. In fact, before it degenerates into an insufferable repetition of “hiding on the back streets,” “Backstreets” is powerfully poetic. With lines like “One soft infested summer / Me and Terry became friends / Trying in vain to breathe / The fire we born in / Catching rides to the outskirts / Tying faith between our teeth / Sleeping in that old abandoned beach house / Getting wasted in the heat,” (“Backstreets”) Springsteen perfectly paints a picture with his words.

Not only focused on painting pictures of specific times and places, Springsteen also uses Born To Run to present thoughts on human relationships. When Springsteen sings “With her killer graces / And her secret places / That no boy can fill / With her hands on her hips / Oh and that smile on her lips / Because she knows that it kills me / With her soft French cream” (“She’s The One”), he wonderfully captures the emotions of desire and frustration. Springsteen understands attraction and unrequited love and he presents it well on “Born To Run.”

On Born To Run, Springsteen also has a tendency to go for longer – and less conventional rhyme schemes. For example, on “Jungleland,” he opens with “The Rangers had a homecoming / In Harlem late last night / And the Magic Rat drove his sleek machine / Over the Jersey state line / Barefoot girl sitting on the hood of a Dodge / Drinking warm beer in the soft summer rain / The Rat pulls into town rolls up his pants / Together they take a stab at romance / And disappear down Flamingo Lane,” which is not at all a typical rock stanza.

Ultimately, Born To Run holds up for the most part and is a poignant album of American life filled with the desire, longing for something better, and dreamy nature of the American dream presented by Bruce Springsteen.

For other works by Bruce Springsteen, please check out my reviews of:
Born In The U.S.A.
Greatest Hits
The Ghost Of Tom Joad
Live In New York
The Rising
Devils & Dust
We Shall Overcome - The Seeger Sessions
Magic
Working On A Dream
High Hopes

7/10

For other music reviews, please check out my Music Review Index Page for an organized listing!

© 2014 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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