Two Laughless Hours Later . . . The Ridiculous 6

The Good: Three lines, perhaps.
The Bad: Wastes the decent cast members, Not funny, Dull plot.
The Basics: Netflix is not doing its subscribers any favors by producing the Adam Sandler-led Western parody The Ridiculous 6.


When it comes to Adam Sandler comedies, I have long known to keep my expectations low. I grew up while Sandler was making his transition from Saturday Night Live to making blockbuster comedy films and they just did not grab me. Until Punch-Drunk Love (reviewed here!), Sandler did not really impress me with his acting abilities. I have also come to have fairly low expectations for Netflix original films as the majority of ones I've seen have left me unimpressed. So, the idea of a Sandler/Netflix film was one I went into with low expectations. The film is The Ridiculous 6 and it is not doing anything to improve my opinion on Adam Sandler comedies or Netflix original films.

The Ridiculous 6 is not Adam Sandler's attempt to make Blazing Saddles (reviewed here!), though Blazing Saddles is generally considered the gold standard of Western comedies. The Adam Sandler parody of a Western film is basically a generic Adam Sandler comedy set in the West. As such, it includes fart and shit jokes mixed in with dry deliveries of ridiculous lines that are hardly unique to the film, like generic baseball jokes. The Ridiculous 6 has bestiality jokes, physical humor and gross jokes involving smearing ointment on humans and flatulent burros indiscriminately. Much of the humor in The Ridiculous 6 falls flat and large chunks of the movie are just gross.

Opening with White Knife, a white man raised by Apaches, going into a nearby town to pick up some flour, he and his fiance are preyed upon by a gang of one-eyed bandits. Tommy "White Knife" Stockburn easily thwarts his adversaries and returns to the tribe that raised him before his biological father, Frank, shows up. Frank Stockburn wants to give his son the treasure he has amassed, but the next morning, the outlaw Cicero appears with his gang and kidknaps Frank for his treasure. Tommy goes off to steal $50,000 to cover the treasure that will not be there when Cicero's gang tries to have Frank dig up his treasure near a singing windmill.

While Tommy searches for places to rob, he encounters various half-brothers - other sons from Frank Stockburn. Tommy meets Ramon, his Mexican half-brother and Ramon encounters their idiot half-brother Pete while Tommy is clearing out the local bank. They discover an Asian half-brother, Herm; a black half-brother, Chico, and Danny, their white half-brother. Together, they try to steal a gold nugget worth $25,000. After their heist, the brothers sing around a campfire, play the first baseball game, and work together to rescue their father.

The Ridiculous 6 is generally a comedy that fails to inspire laughter. The two-hour film got me to smile three times and none of those smiles even came from Sandler. Given that Terry Crews is able to illicit more of a smile than Adam Sandler in The Ridiculous 6, it is hard to even call the movie an Adam Sandler comedy.

It is tough for me to rate movies with performers like Jorge Garcia (totally wasted as he does not have any lines that allow him to emote!), Harvey Keitel (who proves himself to be a definitively dramatic actor by illustrating no talent for comic timing in The Ridiculous 6) and Luke Wilson, so low, but when a movie just sucks, it just sucks.

The Ridiculous 6 just plain sucks.

None of the actors in the flick illustrate any new range or genuine talent - which is sad given that several of the actors are talented. The Ridiculous 6 is not clever, nor is it funny. It is simply a waste of two hours.

For other Netflix exclusive films, please check out my reviews of:
Mascots
ARQ
XOXO
Tallulah
The Fundamentals Of Caring

0/10

For other movie reviews, please check out my Film Review Index Page for an organized listing!

© 2016 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Less Than The Sum Of Its Parts, The Twilight Saga Holds Together Poorly.

| | | The Good: Moments of concept, Portrayal of young love, Cinematography
The Bad: Underdeveloped characters, Melodrama, Stiff acting, Belabored plot
The Basics: The Twilight Saga starts as a charming tale of love between a mortal and an undead individual and drags out a dismal series of conflicts for multiple movies.


There are few movie series’ that have been produced in recent memory that have both such loyal fans and such rabid detractors as The Twilight Saga. Based upon a tremendously popular book series that pretty much defined the contemporary teen paranormal romance genre, the cinematic Twilight Saga was one of the smartest bets by the studios in recent memory. It came with a build-in audience, had a sufficient franchise to draw out and had the potential for mass appeal. And it worked: the success of the first two films made household names of Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart, and Taylor Lautner, as well as launched the career of a number of the secondary performers in the films, and inspired the studio to split the final film into two to milk the fan base for additional money and keep the “phenomenon” alive.

But the same things that made the series seem initially strong also gave so much for the detractors to rant about: the films, which feature vampire and werewolf characters, were remarkably bloodless and for a great romance epic, the main couple was shockingly sexless. The acting was mixed and the fact that the film could not keep a consistent director to maintain a singular vision for the films may have worked against it (especially on the press circuit). For my part, I look at what is directly in front of me. Having sat down and rewatched the entire cinematic rendition of The Twilight Saga, there are several things that stand out to me now, looking at the work as a whole. As it will inevitably be viewed as a solid Saga (shocking that when Breaking Dawn, Part 2 was announced for DVD and Blu-Ray, no collector’s series set was announced simultaneously!), it behooves one to consider the entire work.

The Twilight Saga is a rare example where the parts, when put together, make something significantly less than the films on their own. Allow me to explain.

First, The Twilight Saga consists of the films:
Twilight
New Moon
Eclipse
Breaking Dawn, Part I
Breaking Dawn, Part 2

For those unfamiliar with The Twilight Saga, the five films follow the exploits of Bella Swan, innocent, pale klutzy high school student who moves from Phoenix, Arizona to Forks, Washington when her mother wants to travel more with her new boyfriend. Forks, a mist-covered rural community, is where Bella’s father lives and works as a sheriff. There, Bella meets the mysterious Edward Cullen. Edward, she quickly learns, is a vampire, but a friendly one. Bella and Edward begin a romance, which puts them in danger when a roving trio of vampires comes through and starts killing humans and attacks Bella.

On Bella’s eighteenth birthday, there is an incident and Edward abandons her, ostensibly for her own safety. At that point, Bella rekindles her friendship with Jacob Black, a local who she slowly learns is a werewolf. Jacob’s protective instinct kicks in and while Bella prevents Edward from killing himself so he is no longer tormented by his love for Bella, the attempt draws the attention of the powerful Italian vampires, the Volturi. The Volturi come to Forks shortly thereafter when the villainous Victoria raises an army of vampires to destroy the Cullens and the werewolves and vampires work together to protect Bella and put down the threat of the rogue vampire clan.

After Bella graduates high school, she and Edward get married and during their honeymoon, the unthinkable happens: Bella gets pregnant from Edward and the spawn is something no one quite understands.

What struck me most about rewatching The Twilight Saga all together was what a weak link New Moon (which I rather enjoyed when it originally was released) was and just what a forced sense of conflict the Saga possesses. The initial villains are dispatched fairly quickly and make way for a far less sensible group of villains. The Volturi are visually menacing and creepy beyond belief, but they are basically superpower vampires who claim to be working to preserve the vampires and keep them off the humans’ radar while being the most obtrusive group of vampires: while the Cullens and the other vampires seen in the Saga generally blend in, the Volturi look like out-of-date elves who kill humans with startling regularity.

The love triangle (a term I loathe because it seldom is actually true – and is not in The Twilight Saga, as there is no emotional connection between Edward and Jacob) between Bella and Edward and Bella and Jacob seems increasingly forced as the film series goes on. In fact, outside of most of New Moon, it is painfully clear to everyone save Jacob that Bella has chosen Edward as her love interest. Even more than any problems with Kristen Stewart’s (who plays Bella) acting, Bella becomes a problematic character for the way she makes her choice, yet keeps stringing Jacob along.

Ironically, Eclipse, which might be the least-respected of the films, is a stronger link in the storytelling. With a compelling villain, a cool effect (the battles in this film are bigger and actually have significance) and a real test for the Edward/Bella relationship where Edward’s solution is not simply to run away, Eclipse actually stands up as a solid and engaging film. It is, when viewed as a whole Saga, also the high water mark of the films.

The final two films seem like much more of a coda comparatively. They seem like a necessary evil to the story, as opposed to a vital chapter, a simple fleshing out of the promise at the climax of Eclipse as opposed to an engaging end to the story. Here is why: the wedding is an inevitable, obvious plot point that was pretty much foreseeable the moment Edward returned to Bella in New Moon. The incident with the Volturi is a forced plot point – in a perfect world with the seemingly endless financial resources of the Cullens and the fact that the Volturi are in Italy, Bella and Edward could have easily avoided them for all eternity – and the conception of Renesmee seems an artful dodge for an audience obviously not prepared for an actual adult relationship. In other words, the first year of most real marriages is, frankly, hell (after the Honeymoon period wears off). It takes a real love and patience to survive the first year of a marriage as two people give up doing everything their own way and figure out how to do things “the Us way.” That, however, is not what the audience who wants to gush over an immortal love between a hundred plus year-old man and an eighteen year-old woman wants to watch. So, the writers and directors provide a much more literal hell (and a less-than-subtle admonishment about the dangers of sexuality!) when Bella’s first lovemaking produces a monstrous pregnancy that (among other things) shatters Bella’s spine and leaves her with becoming a vampire as her only viable chance of survival. Instead of taking the fantasy of immortal love and making it seem more real, The Twilight Saga makes love seem more preposterous and uncomfortable and dangerous.

The Twilight Saga has somewhat inconsistent direction but, oddly enough, a consistent sense of spectacle and quality of cinematography that makes the movies eminently watchable. The pacing for the Saga is off and the acting is inconsistent. However, while Kristen Stewart gets the awkward nature of Bella Swan right in Twilight, it is not until the Breaking Dawn movies that she is given more room to express range, so she goes through most of the Saga stiff and portraying boredom over passion. In rewatching the Saga, it is actually Robert Pattinson who stands out for the poor acting. Whereas Taylor Lautner portrays Jacob Black as an invested, interesting, and passionate guy, Pattinson’s role seems to be simply to show up. Edward Cullen is cold, passionless, and frightfully dull and Pattinson does not make the role any warmer. Instead, he is stiff, gives Stewart almost nothing to play off of and yet, when he smiles, that is supposed to substitute for actual personality.

It, alas, does not.

Ultimately, any one of the Twilight films is fine, but when viewed together as the complete Twilight Saga, it becomes tiresome and more of a mess than it ought to. Fans and moviegoers deserve quite a bit more.

For other film sagas, please check out my reviews of:
The Dark Knight Trilogy
The Harry Potter Saga
The Lord Of The Rings Trilogy

5/10

For other film reviews, please check out my Movie Review Index Page for an organized listing!

© 2013 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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More Action Than Romance, The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2 Ends The Saga In An Unremarkable Way.

The Good: Special effects, Most of the acting, Pacing, Direction
The Bad: Light on character development, Unimpressive plot
The Basics: Completing The Twilight Saga on screen, Breaking Dawn - Part 2 focuses on the conflict between the Cullens and Volturi without anything superlative.


Fantasy has been big in teen literature and cinema since the Harry Potter Saga (reviewed here!) and the franchise that has stepped most fully into the niche left by the completion of that movie series has been The Twilight Saga. As Breaking Dawn - Part 2 hits theaters, it is hard not to admit that some franchises work better than others. While I was not a fan of the Harry Potter films when they began, they developed into something I generally enjoyed. The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2 takes the franchise in the other direction. Like most final acts of a larger story, Breaking Dawn - Part 2 is exceptionally dependent upon the films that preceded it. That means that Breaking Dawn - Part 2 will mean almost nothing to those who have not seen Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, and/or Breaking Dawn, Part I.

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2 does what it needs to in terms of completing the Twilight Saga, but fans of the teen-based, supernaturally-themed romance might be less impressed by this installment. Outside the fans of the books and films who are going to see it and praise it regardless of the objective quality, Breaking Dawn - Part 2 works far less to develop the characters and, instead, creates a plot thread that takes the focus well away from the intimate romance and tortured love triangle between the three main protagonists and instead refocuses the story on the conflict between most of the vampire clans and the villainous Volturi.

Following the birth of Renesmee and Bella Cullen (formerly Swan) being turned by Edward into a vampire to save her life, Bella begins exploring her newfound powers as a vampire. Annoyed at Jacob for imprinting upon Renesmee, Bella nevertheless finds some peace in her life as she accepts her new life as a vampire. With Jacob's help she even reveals herself - in a very limited fashion - to her father. As Renesmee ages rapidly, the Cullens work to understand the exact nature of the child. Their quest to understand what she is is cut short when Irina, a vampire who visited the Cullens, reports to the Volturi that Renesmee’s existence breaks the decrees of the Volturi.

Knowing that Aro and Jane, the powerful Volturi, are coming to Forks with the intent of passing lethal judgment on the Cullens, Bella and Edward work to protect their daughter. Enlisting Jacob Black, whose feelings for Bella have faded, the Cullens search for other vampire families around the world to aid them in protecting Renesmee. The forces of various vampire covens and Jacob’s werewolf allies band together to confront the Volturi. Unable to rely upon Jasper and Alice, Bella learns of her new powers as a shield and uses that training to prepare for the inevitable conflict with Aro and the Volturi!

Breaking Dawn - Part 2 is far less melodramatic and sappy than the prior installments in The Twilight Saga. Instead, Breaking Dawn - Part 2 is a pretty steady action movie that builds from the exploration of Bella’s newfound powers into what is essentially a battle film. The final conflict puts to shame the battle sequences from the prior movies as well. Director Bill Condon has a strong sense of vision for Breaking Dawn - Part 2. The action sequences and special effects are tighter and more refined than other films in The Twilight Saga. For those who were bored by the ponderous pace of New Moon (especially), will find that Breaking Dawn - Part 2 provides a more consistent sense of dramatic tension and movement.

What Breaking Dawn - Part 2 lacks is a stronger romantic aspect than the prior installments. Those who are into The Twilight Saga for the angsty love story will find Breaking Dawn - Part 2 lacking. The on-screen chemistry between Kristen Stewart (Bella) and Robert Pattinson (Edward) is still alive and kicking, but Condon and screenwriter Melissa Rosenberg do remarkably little with it. Ironically, given that The Twilight Saga is made for gushing teenage girls who want to believe in powerful romantic love, Breaking Dawn - Part 2 has a jaded masculine sensibility to it. Many men fear that the birth of a child will change their relationship with their spouse and, with the change in tone in Breaking Dawn - Part 2, that is essentially what the viewer gets. Bella’s priority becomes protecting Renesmee over expressing her undying (literally!) love for Edward. The shift in the movie’s energy when watched immediately after the other films in the Saga is noticeable.

Breaking Dawn - Part 2 re-establishes Bella and instead of truly developing her character, she is redefined in the beginning of the film and then sticks with the new iteration of the character through the rest of the movie. Breaking Dawn - Part 2 is more or less devoid of actual character development for the rest of the movie, though Bella is transformed into something of an action hero in this film. Edward is essentially his unchanging self and Jacob’s transference of emotions is understated, as opposed to creepy.

On the acting front, the ensemble cast is well-honed. Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, and Taylor Lautner all expertly execute the roles they originated in Twilight and developed for the four prior movies. This film does not stretch them in any new directions, save Stewart illustrating a slightly more protective instinct. She has played Bella, in the past, as the character who needs protection and in this film, she steps up to play more protective with reasonable success. The real breakout for Breaking Dawn - Part 2 is Mackenzie Foy. Foy plays Renesmee and she has a serious demeanor that allows her to fit in with the more seasoned performers.

Ultimately, Breaking Dawn - Part 2 is much more average than in any way extraordinary. Breaking Dawn - Part 2 is not bad, but it does not pop, it lacks a hook that is at all intriguing. While the earlier films had a freshness to them, Breaking Dawn - Part 2 feels much more like a typical supernatural action-adventure story than a truly audacious or interesting vampire-themed romance. Fans will flock to see it, but those who are not already invested in the franchise may want to wait for it to hit DVD.

For other fantasy films, please check out my reviews of:
Snow White And The Huntsman
Beautiful Creatures
Labyrinth

5.5/10

For other film reviews, be sure to check out my Movie Review Index Page for an organized listing!

© 2012 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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More Sex, Kristen Stewart's Sideboob And Blood: Breaking Dawn Part 1 Is An Awkward Transition Film!

The Good: Engaging plot, Decent supplementary character moments, Effects
The Bad: Primary characters do not truly advance, Moments of shaky acting, Erratic.
The Basics: Partially romantic and genuinely erotic, partly bloody and violent, The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1 is good, but not great like some might hope.


I have, in the past, been a champion of the cinematic Twilight Saga. The truth is, the three movies that have made up the Twilight Saga until now have been all right, though plagued with more of a sense of teenage melodrama than I would, at times, like. The sense of "everything is so important at this age" and a sanitizing of both sex and violence has made the Twilight Saga a surprisingly accessible and unthreatening story. But with the release of Breaking Dawn Part 1 that safety is gone and what results is surprisingly less intense or interesting than it had been.

In recent years, there has been a genre that has sprouted up that I have found entirely distasteful. No, it's not the supernatural romance that became a mainstream genre with Stephanie Meyer's Twilight books, that's fine. In film, there has been a genre that has sprouted up that rather grossly links graphic sex and then graphic violence. Films like Hostel, The Ruins, and Piranha 3-D (reviewed here!) flood the viewer with sexually titillating imagery before turning their stomachs with graphic gore, torture and and/or violence. Breaking Dawn, Part 1 is the sanitized, intended for young adults, version of that genre, much the way Twilight (reviewed here!) was a very sanitized fantasy with no real adult thematic issues to cerebrally challenge viewers, the abstinence-only New Moon (reviewed here!) was a safe romance and Eclipse (reviewed here!) was a remarkably family-friendly action-adventure movie. Vastly less extreme than any of the R or Unrated examples I cited, Breaking Dawn Part 1 erratically transitions from a schmaltzy, still-safe romance into a blood-filled horror that begs the question, "Why not wait?"

The audience that got hooked on the Twilight books was generally 13 - 21 when the first Twilight film came out. That was 2008. That means, if the producers wanted to truly honor the "R"-rated content of the Breaking Dawn novel, the movie ought to have been released in 2013 when that bottom demographic would have been 18 and their parents could not find it objectionable to let them see more of Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson than a little sideboob, a little butt and a lot of male chest. That said, nothing stood out in Breaking Dawn Part 1 that wasn't sanitized down to an appropriate PG-13 level and it is hard for me to imagine many of the Twi-Moms not coming away from the theater feeling a little cheated.

That said, as one who has both not read Breaking Dawn and been part of a franchise where most of the big emotional moment one had been waiting years for was left on the cutting room floor, I suspect most Twi-hards will be happy with the resulting film. Unlike Stuart Baird, who left most of the much anticipated wedding between Riker and Troi for deleted scenes on the DVD for Star Trek: Nemesis (reviewed here!), director Bill Condon does not rush the wedding of Bella Swan and Edward Cullen. Even so, the wedding is treated more like an inhibition to the story actually getting going than a vital event. In other words, the wedding is the icebreaker that the viewer must get through in order to get to the sex, violence and - incidentally - story of Breaking Dawn Part 1.

At long last, Bella Swan and Edward Cullen tie the knot. Their wedding, attended by human and vampire kin alike, is a generally joyful celebration that leads to the pair getting away for their honeymoon. Enjoying her supposed last days of humanity, Edward and Bella finally make love . . . repeatedly. Unfortunately for Bella, the unthinkable happens and Edward manages to get Bella pregnant, sparking the first real fight for the couple when Edward becomes convinced that the fetus cannot possibly be good news. With Carlisle baffled as to how the pregnancy occurred, Bella digs in her heels, committing to the pregnancy.

The pregnancy draws the attention of Jacob's werewolf brethren and the Volturi, both of whom see the supernatural half-breed as a serious threat to their species. As the Cullens close in to protect Bella, she gets an unlikely ally in Jacob. With Bella's body being battered from within by the supernatural fetus, Jacob joins forces with Jasper and the Cullens to repel the threats to Bella's life.

Breaking Dawn Part 1 feels like what it is, a middle act of sorts. What works for it is that it seems to be going somewhere and the setup is a decent one. It is hard to imagine seeing this film and not clamoring to see the finale. That said, it is far from flawless.

Breaking Dawn Part 1 suffers primarily by feeling like it doesn't know what it wants to be. Like any number of movies that desperately try to get the PG-13 rating instead of an "R," Breaking Dawn Part 1 feels like it pulls too many of its punches. Jacob, for example, never seems to be as realistically angry as one might expect when the woman he loves not only marries someone else, but then gets into a situation where he feels obliged to help. Jacob is left with a strange lack of complexity (and an unsurprising lack of a shirt). But, even when Jacob manages to stay clothed, he does not resonate as a real or vital character.

Similarly and most damaging is how Bella does not progress in the course of the film. The pregnancy, like so many things in Bella Swan's story, is just another thing that happens to her. Bella does not become more sophisticated, more intuitive or more interesting, she is just pregnant. Similarly, despite the problems the pregnancy causes, this is not a huge strain on the relationship between Edward and Bella. The coming threat of the Volturi is a menace, but it does not fundamentally change Bella or Edward or the way they love one another. So, after a hundred years of avoiding humans like Bella, Edward tries to stay away from the young woman - for her own good - then his fears are proven correct and he never seems to resent her for her contribution to their strife.

On the acting front, Breaking Dawn Part 1 finds the principle actors with their parts honed and delivering nothing truly new. We've seen Kristen Stewart shake and look pained, we've seen Robert Pattinson look confused and we've seen Taylor Lautner look upset and strong. So, none of the performances sing with anything resonating as beyond the already-established skill levels for the actors.

For his brief part in Breaking Dawn Part 1, it was Michael Sheen as Aro who wowed me. Having seen him most recently in the comedic recurring role in the fourth season of 30 Rock (reviewed here!), Sheen's ability to be commanding and menacing resurfaces to remind viewers what a dramatic powerhouse he can be. It is a refreshing performance, no matter how brief.

As for the special effects, director Condon uses the soundtrack exceptionally well to augment the emotional impact of key moments without overwhelming them. There are a few moments, as near the climax, that the soundtrack telegraphs the emotions a bit, but for the most part, the soundtrack is an actual special effect that helps tell the story. The CG effects are fully honed in Breaking Dawn Part 1 as well, with the writhing fetus in the womb looking surprisingly realistic - and uncomfortable - and the computer generated wolves looking perfect to each hair on the head.

In the end, though, Breaking Dawn Part 1 was fun and the story moved, but the pacing felt a little belabored at points and the plot moved the characters, not the other way around. Outside Jacob - who stood with Bella in Eclipse, so it's nothing truly new - taking a stand, the plot elements happen to the characters more than the characters making the plot turn in a new or interesting direction. While this could be the death knell, there is just enough to make those not already a fan stick it out and be glad they did. . .

. . . and hope Breaking Dawn Part 2 wraps it up better.

For other Twilight-related reviews, please be sure to visit my reviews of:
2011 Bella, Edward And Jacob Hallmark Ornament
Twilight: The Graphic Novel - Volume 1
Twilight trading cards

6.5/10

For other film reviews, be sure to visit my index page by clicking here!

© 2011 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.

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Even Worse With More Characters, The 2011 "Bella, Edward And Jacob" Ornament Isn't A Good Buy For Twilight Fans!

The Good: Detailing on tattoo/general coloring
The Bad: Animated look, Terrible rendering of Bella, Under-detailed, Seems expensive, Off-balance.
The Basics: "Bella, Edward And Jacob" is a Hallmark ornament plagued by an unambitious sculpt and fleshed out poorly with overly-light color detailing.


Despite what my more casual readers might think, I actually like Twilight merchandise. The NECA figures may be overproduced, but they tend to be pretty awesome sculpts of the main characters from the Twilight Saga films. But I'm not a fan of any fanbase that is exploited. Last year, Hallmark appeared to throw together their Edward And Bella ornament (reviewed here!). The sculpt was lightly detailed and poorly colored and Hallmark can do so much better than that, as is evidenced by ornaments like this year's limited edition Bossk ornament (reviewed here!). Sadly, because Hallmark sold out of their Twilight ornament last year, they were encouraged to continue creating substandard ornaments for the fans. The new Hallmark Bella, Edward And Jacob ornament is that substandard ornament seeking to separate Twilight fans from their money.

For those unfamiliar with the concept, “Bella, Edward And Jacob” is a holiday ornament that features the three main protagonists from the film version of Eclipse (please check out my review by clicking here!). Capturing the conceptual angst of the relationship between the three protagonists, the “Bella, Edward And Jacob” ornament has the two men with their backs to one another with Bella in between with her back to them as well..

Basics

“Bella, Edward And Jacob” features Edward Cullen in his button-down shirt standing with his back to Bella Swan, looking over his left shoulder at her. Bella's right hand is reaching behind her and holding Edward's left hand. Jacob is standing with his back to both of them, not touching either, looking over his right shoulder toward Bella as well. The ornament, released in 2011, is a disappointing ornament that is overly expensive for an ornament of its size. It is weak on sculpted detailing and nuanced coloring for the characters.

Jacob, for example, looks nothing like Taylor Lautner, with a face that is more round and a strangely more prominent forehead than Lautner has. Similarly, Bella looks little like actress Kristen Stewart. Her face lacks the angles and jawline of Stewart. Both characters lack realistic shading and depth to their skin tones. While this might be acceptable for Edward, whatwith him being a vampire, Hallmark has his skin tones more creamy than white.

Bella, Edward And Jacob all have animated looks to them, especially in their eyes which are not painted with the greatest detailing. Instead, Bella, Edward And Jacob stand there with lifeless eyes freaking out those looking at the Christmas tree. To be fair to Hallmark, Edward's spiky hair is difficult to render and they got it looking almost like he was not wearing a strange helmet. Jacob's hair is not so fortunately rendered; it looks like he is wearing a helmet.

On the plus side, the shoelaces on the characters' feet are present in both sculpting and coloring details. Bella's hair has highlights, but strangely this looks less realistic than images of Bella I've seen. The best detailing on the ornament is the tattoo on Jacob's right shoulder. The round tattoo is painted on the character's shoulder and given the ornament's scale, it looks realistic. As well, the jeans and the ground the trio is standing on has decent coloring to it; it is not just monotonal.

Measuring 4" tall, 2" wide and 1 1/2" deep, the “Bella, Edward And Jacob” ornament has not been flying off the shelves locally. This might be because the ornament has a price tag of $19.95, which is more than many of the other character-only ornaments this year.

Features

As a Hallmark Keepsake ornament, “Bella, Edward And Jacob” could have a function like a sound chip or light effect, but does not. This is just an ornament that captures the two three characters from the film without any embellishments.

Balance

As with all ornaments, the intent of the Hallmark Keepsake “Bella, Edward And Jacob” ornament is to be hung on a Christmas Tree. And for those creating the ultimate fantasy Christmas Tree, the “Bella, Edward And Jacob” ornament is a poor addition. The poor rendering is likely to stand out next to other, better characters who were rendered with more details. The ornament has a standard brass hook loop and I tested five different ornaments. Not one hangs properly from that loop. No matter how I tried to hang the ornament, the ground was never fully level.

Collectibility

Hallmark Keepsake began delving into the collectibles market in 1991 with Star Trek when it introduced the exceptionally limited edition original U.S.S. Enterprise ornament (reviewed here!). Since then, they have delved into virtually every other collectible franchise in an attempt to cash in on every major license, like Indiana Jones, Marvel Comics and now Twilight. While Twi-hards might buy this up now, one suspects this will be one of the first pieces of merchandise dumped when a better version is later made; last year's ornament is easily available well-below the original issue price. Similarly, I suspect this ornament has been so overproduced that it will be available enough after the Christmas holiday that resellers and investors will be able to buy them up and offer them for less than the original issue price.

Overview

The "Bella, Edward And Jacob" ornament is a disappointment that Twilight fans will continue to feel exploited, as opposed to celebrated. Hopefully, before the second part of Breaking Dawn is released cinematically, Hallmark realizes the fan base could be nurtured with quality ornaments instead of just relied upon for a fistful of dollars.

For other genre ornaments from Hallmark in 2011, be sure to check out my reviews of:
Fleeing The Fiendfyre Harry Potter ornament
Captain Jack Sparrow ornament
"Mirror, Mirror" Star Trek ornament

2.5/10

For other ornament reviews, please check out my index page!

© 2011 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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The Available Man Gets His Card With The Twilight PW7 Jacob Black Pieceworks Card!

The Good: Good image, Necessary for collectors, Quite rare, Collectible value
The Bad: Expensive!
The Basics: A very neat trading card, the PW-7 Taylor Lautner as Jacob Black costume card is very difficult to find and expensive when one can find it!


As I filter through the binder that stores my collection of Twilight trading cards (click here for my review!), I have to be honest with myself. While I, as a cinephile and collector of trading cards am most jazzed that I have the full collection and think the valuable Pieceworks cards of the female characters are really something, it is hard to not admit that that is not the case for most collectors of the Twilight trading cards. No, most of them fall into a very different demographic from me and as a result, it is often the PW7 Jacob Black Pieceworks card that outstrips the value of even the Bella Swan Pieceworks card. For those on “Team Jacob,” this is the grail card, but the fact that it is sometimes able to be found on the secondary market while the Edward Cullen Pieceworks cards have all but disappeared says something a bit more telling. Still, there are enough Team Jacob collectors who have helped the Taylor Lautner Pieceworks card explode in value to the point where only serious collectors may afford to buy it!

When the film Twilight (click here for my review!) was released, Inkworks won the license and began producing exceptionally limited trading cards. With their Twilight trading card series, one of the highly-sought-after bonus cards were the Pieceworks cards and as one of the two big love interests for the film saga’s protagonist, the Jacob Black Pieceworks card has skyrocketed in value.

For those unfamiliar with the concept, the Pieceworks cards are costume cards and the PW-7 Jacob Black card is no exception. What this means is that the physical card is a little more than twice as thick as the standard trading cards. Inkworks took a set-worn costume, in this case Taylor Lautner’s bluejeans, chopped it up and embedded it in between the two card halves. This means that Taylor Lautner’s original pants from Twilight no longer exists, save in the pieces in cards. This is the closest most people will get to an actual set-worn costume from Twilight and given that Jacob Black is a popular character, it is an exceptional card.

The PW7 Jacob Black Piecework card features a nice shot of Taylor Lautner in his bluejeans from the scene in Twilight where Bella Swan is reunited with her childhood friend. On the left side of the card is the cutout window which features the cloth piece from the costume embedded in it! All versions of this card that I have found have had a plain blue denim swatch.

The back of the card assures the recipient of the authenticity of the Pieceworks card. It states that the PW7 features a piece of Taylor Lautner’s Jacob Black bluejeans costume and that is pretty much the standard for a costume card of this style.

The value of the card makes it a great investment for those lucky enough to pull one from a pack of Twilight cards. Considering the PW-7 is one of the more rare Twilight Pieceworks cards, the fact that its value has become near-impossible to find at reasonable prices is not a surprise at all. For those lucky enough to pull one in a pack of the hard-to-find trading cards, they are lucky. Most will have to buy it and it is priced prohibitively high for any but the most serious collectors. Given that Pieceworks cards are found only one per box in the Twilight cards, most will pay ridiculous prices for this.

Given, however, that this is the closest most fans are likely to get to Taylor Lautner now that he is no longer on the convention circuit, one suspects there are plenty of fans who will pay the outrageous prices this card is found at . . . when it can be found!

For other Twilight Saga merchandise, please check out my reviews of:
"Edward And Bella" Hallmark ornament
The Short Second Life Of Bree Tanner novella
Eclipse (DVD/Blu-Ray)

8/10

For other trading card releases, please check out my index page!

© 2010 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.


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Doing More Than Just Encouraging Fans, The Twilight Saga: Eclipse Delivers!

The Good: Decent acting, character development, special effects, Sense that story is going somewhere, DVD/Blu-Ray bonus features
The Bad: A lot feels very familiar.
The Basics: The next installment in The Twilight Saga, Eclipse progresses the stories and relationships from the earlier films and is entertaining for viewers from teenagers up.


Series’ become tougher and tougher for non-fans the longer the series persists. Those who are not embedded in a phenomenon tend to be looking for something that builds on the prior installments while still giving viewers something that feels new, if not entirely familiar. So, for example, with Twilight (click here for review!) the pressure on filmmakers was to please fans and get an audience who had not read any of the books intrigued in the story and characters. With New Moon (click here for review!) the pressure was to retain the audience and not simply repeat the teen melodrama aspects and allow the audience to feel like the story was actually going somewhere. They largely succeeded. With Eclipse, the third installment in the Twilight Saga, the stakes are raised, especially for those who are not already glued to the series.

For that audience, the fear has to be that Eclipse will simply be a repetition of the two prior installments and will be more teen melodrama than anything else. After all, in The Twilight Saga, there is a romance to vampires and werewolves and much of Kristen Stewart’s acting involves alternately looking moon-eyed and falling down. With Eclipse, the formula is broken and the film fearlessly illustrates what it only implied in New Moon, that most vampires are actually angry and quite evil. While New Moon had the carnage off-screen, Eclipse illustrates it and the conflict becomes more than just a teenage “I love him,” “no, I love the other guy,” “no, I love the first guy more” story. And it is bound to be well-received by the fans. It was well-received by this non-fan.

Bella Swan and Edward Cullen have made it through their Senior year of high school and as their relationship is deepening, Bella is applying to colleges. They realize they have slightly different views on both marriage and Bella being turned into a vampire, their own conflicts are enhanced by Charlie wanting Bella to spend more time with Jacob than with Edward. But in nearby Seattle, Washington, there have been killings which Jacob knows are the work of vampires. Bella, despite Edward’s dislike of Jacob, continues to visit Jacob and Jacob’s werewolf clan moves to deal with the vampires, while Jacob becomes more protective of his best friend. When Edward and the Cullens are given proof that the problems in Seattle are the works of vampires, Alice sees the menace coming to Forks and the Cullens are forced to flee.

With an army of vampires descending upon Forks, Bella, Edward and Jacob flee in order to protect Bella as she appears to be the target of the rage of the vampires. With the newborn attack imminent, the Cullen family joins forces with the werewolves in order to prevent the slaughter of humans and the exposure of both supernatural communities.

The nicest thing about Eclipse is that while the characters seem largely the same in the film, the plot has an almost constant sense of movement and the film feels like it is going somewhere. And where it goes is worth the wait. The key to who is behind the army of vampires and why makes perfect sense and the emotional resonance carries back to the final scene of Twilight, which works for those who have seen the prior installments. For those who have not seen Twilight, the motivations for Victoria are repeated enough so that she seems like a reasonable villain. Newbie viewers are more likely to be lost by the appearance of Jane and the Volturi than Victoria and her arc.

On the subject of Victoria, Bryce Dallas Howard steps into the role beautifully and while fans might miss Rachel Lefevre, Howard does a good job of playing Victoria as both harsh and wounded. In fact, I didn’t even notice the recasting until the credits, that is how flawlessly Howard assumes the looks and mannerisms of Victoria as characterized by Lefevre.

On the character front, Eclipse does a decent job of progressing Bella, Edward and Jacob, though it narrowly misses recreating the sense of watching the same ridiculous love triangle in the prior film. The movie works in this regard because it leaves the characters with a much more firm sense of who each of the principles are and what direction they are headed in. Bella manages to swoon more for Edward and the resulting decisions she makes feel much more organic than simply having to choose between the two lead hunks. The result is that Eclipse replays better than New Moon for those who are not looking at the series for the teenage romance aspect.

As far as performances go, Ashley Greene continues to steal her scenes as Alice Cullen, the vampire who is able to see the future (except when it is most useful). Fortunately, her vision is explained and explored more in this movie, as is Jasper’s twitchiness. Jackson Rathbone has played Jasper as twitchy and dark and in Eclipse he is given the chance to steal a scene or two for more than just chill factor. He portrays Jasper in a more adult fashion and when Jasper begins to take a leadership role in the planning of the combat, it is Rathbone’s performance which sells it.

The leading men do what they have done before, so there are no surprises from Robert Pattinson (Edward), Taylor Lautner (Jacob), Billy Burke (Charlie, Bella’s father) or Peter Facinelli (Carlisle Cullen). Facinelli deserves a special note in that his role as the Cullen patriarch is given more importance in Eclipse and Facinelli makes good use of the screentime. His trick is to both provide a level of consistency and to make quiet scenes where Carlisle provides deeply human wisdom seem inhuman and Facinelli nails it.

Kristen Stewart continues to do a decent job of balancing Bella’s role as damsel in distress and normal teenage girl. In Eclipse, the role is a bit more physical for her and she seems up to the task. Waifish girls everywhere have a new role model in Stewart’s Swan and she plays off Pattinson well, so at the very least the film portrays a very real sense of sexual chemistry.

Finally, while New Moon had some morph effects which were not ideal (notably with werewolf transformations), Eclipse has the kinks worked out. The special effects are amazing – especially the new effect that gets around blood and gore related to werewolves slaughtering vampires! - and adult audiences are likely only to be disappointed in that they do not go far enough. The climactic battle has startlingly little blood for a conflict of its magnitude and those looking at this for an adult sense of realism are likely to be a little let down. The lack of blood is actually well portrayed and the fracturing of limbs is pretty awesome!

But those looking for something new to swoon about in Forks, Washington, where vampires and werewolves are real and they are all interested in teenagers, Eclipse is something to rave about.

And there is more to rave about with the two-disc DVD and Blu-Ray presentation of the film. There, Eclipse is loaded with two commentary tracks as well as a small number of deleted scenes which flesh out key moments of the movie. There is also another six-part featurette on the making of Eclipse, which fits with prior Twilight Saga DVD releases. As well, there are music videos for songs featured in the movie and on the Eclipse soundtrack. In other words, there is plenty to enjoy!

For other Twilight Saga merchandise or works, please check out my reviews of:
Twilight trading cards
The Short Second Life Of Bree Tanner (novella) By Stephanie Meyer
“Edward And Bella” Hallmark Ornament

8/10

For other movie reviews, please check out my index page!

© 2010 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.


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Something To Gush About: New Moon Has Decent Romance And Conflict.

The Good: Good character work, Decent special effects, General plot, General acting
The Bad: Plot changes up rather abruptly, A few acting wrinkles.
The Basics: Tugging on the heartstrings before becoming a pretty intense action movie, New Moon progresses the Twilight Saga well.

When New Moon came out, it was a pretty good week for my wife and I. Star Trek hit Blu-Ray (and became the first one in our permanent collection) and the release of New Moon theatrically, which was her favorite book in the Twilight Saga, we were both very happy. Given how the first movie I took her to was Twilight (check out my review by clicking here), I was quite excited to be able to share our first viewing of New Moon together by going out to a midnight showing. Since then, we’ve seen the movie a couple of times and even picked up some of the merchandise, like the Bella and Edward Hallmark ornament.

While my wife is a big fan of the Twilight Saga, I have not read any of the books. As a result, this is a very pure review of the film alone. That said, my partner and I were psyched about seeing the next installment in the Twilight Saga and from the sheer number of hand squeezes and excited glances I received from my wife, I am fairly sure readers of the books will enjoy the film. But for those who might not have liked the teen melodrama of Twilight, New Moon offers a bit more and despite the fact that it treads in some pretty familiar ways, New Moon is surprisingly engaging, even to those who might not be predisposed toward the Twilight Saga.

After a nightmare wherein Bella Swan realizes just how profound her aging will be when compared to the immortal nature of her vampire lover, Edward, she begins her Senior year of high school at Forks. On her eighteenth birthday, she tries to keep the event quiet, but is invited to the Cullen’s (local good vampires in Forks, WA) house for a small party. While opening a gift, she gets a papercut and the least stable of the brood, Jacob, makes to harm her. Between this and the fact that locals have begun to notice Dr. Carlisle Cullen not quite looking the right age, Edward and the Cullens leave Forks and abandon Bella. As the months go by, Bella is plagued with loneliness and night terrors, missing both Edward and his “sister,” Alice, whom she had become friends with. After a few stupid decisions which put her in danger, Bella turns to her friend Jacob for companionship.

Over the course of reconstructing two motorcycles together, Bella and Jacob become closer and Bella begins to realize Jacob makes her feel better about Edward’s absence. But Jacob is feeling stress about something within his tribe and he, too, soon flees from Bella. When that happens, Bella becomes proactive and discovers exactly what Jacob’s secret is; he has become a werewolf, like many of the Quileute tribe. The Quileute aid Bella and police chief Swan in dispatching Laurent and hunting Victoria. But during the hunt for Victoria, Bella takes a rash action which causes Alice to have a vision, which changes everything.

At that point, the movie changes from a compellingly moody character study into more of an action-adventure film and even with the format change. Director Chris Weitz does a decent job of maintaining the feel of Twilight while evolving the look in New Moon. If the color palate was blue-washed for much of Twilight, New Moon is simply dark in many of the key moments. It is only in the climax of the film that the colors seem so rich and real that the viewer feels like they are immersed within the story.

Beyond that, New Moon is a very different film from Twilight. Whereas Twilight was preoccupied with building up a passion between Bella and Edward, New Moon quickly becomes a film that is fleshing out the mythos of the Twilight universe. Unfortunately, it is remarkably similar to the mythos of virtually every other fantasy-horror series in recent years. Most closely mimicking the backstory of Underworld, New Moon establishes a now familiar long history of animosity between vampires and werewolves which was only alluded to in Twilight. The thing is, because viewers have seen so much of this in recent years, it is a harder sell and Stephanie Meyer and scriptwriter Melissa Rosenberg have little to offer. Vampires hate werewolves, werewolves hate vampires, humans get caught in the middle. We get it. New Moon, unfortunately, offers no new twists on that old dichotomy.

What the film and the writing deserve credit for is creating a mythos that has some plausible sense of history to it. By fleshing out the Quileute tribe and the Volturi, New Moon does have a sense of being larger than Bella, Edward and Jacob, which is something the first Twilight Saga film did not have. As well, the development of the story is remarkably well done. So, for example, each vampire has a skill and in the first film this was mentioned more in passing and not every character had their talent revealed. Early on, it is revealed that Jasper “pushes” emotions onto others and so when he becomes crazed at the sight of Bella’s blood, the scatter that results has a reality to it that would have been lacking, if not for the seed planted earlier. Similarly, Jacob’s sense of unrest with what is going on with the Quileutes is developed slowly without any quick answers. The movie has a sense of being big and deep, which is a nice change from Twilight.

At the same time, New Moon is surprisingly intimate in its focus on Bella. While Jacob gets a lot more screentime and the werewolf Quileute are made more explicit than in the first film, Bella is the obvious subject of most of the film. Isolated from her one true love, she does what virtually any young woman would do; she checks out the other options available to her. But before that, Weitz and the writers flesh the time and loneliness out with one of the least campy time-lapse sequences in recent years. Bella’s night terrors are difficult to watch – we do not see her nightmares, but rather their effect – and her hallucinations of Edward often are unsettling. In short, while the budding romance between Bella and Jacob is delivered with realistic pace, far more interesting is the simple and direct character study of the young woman and her emotional struggle to let go of the man who has promised never to see her again.

But this leads to the biggest acting nit in New Moon. New Moon has some pretty solid acting, especially for such a young cast. Robert Pattinson does a decent job of being realistically moody and trying to restrain himself as Edward. Taylor Lautner actually shows some serious acting chops as Jacob by having the greatest emotional range in the film. Lautner deserves a lot of credit because Jacob is not just some conflicted guy trying not to love, he has moments where he is happy and Jacob is emotionally aware enough to suspect that he is just a placebo for the absent Edward. Lautner plays the moments of bliss, anger and surprising emotional articulation equally well.

But Kristen Stewart is given an acting challenge she does not quite rise to well enough and it is what holds the film back from reaching higher. Bella Swan is tormented by night terrors that leave her body writhing in agony and screaming . . . but never, strangely, sweating. She is hallucinating Edward at dangerous moments, but when the moment passes, she seems generally all right. Here’s a woman who is not sleeping and doing dangerously stupid things, yet Stewart carries her as surprisingly awake and alert at virtually every moment of the film. It doesn’t quite jive. Those with a real attention for detail will find this most problematic at the climax of the film when Bella is surprisingly energetic.

On DVD, New Moon comes with commentary tracks, featurettes on the making of the movie and previews for this film and the next installment. Having since seen Eclipse and read The Short Second Life Of Bree Tanner, the films are worth seeing and the bonus features are pretty pleasing for the fans.

That said, New Moon does exactly what it sets out to do and it does it surprisingly well. There is good chemistry between the principle actors and the special effects are wonderful. As well, the soundtrack is unobtrusive and the story has enough going for it to draw viewers back for the next installment. Anyone who likes fantasy romance or even action-adventure films with character will likely enjoy New Moon.

For other fantasy or science fiction films, please check out my reviews of:
The Nightmare Before Christmas
Land Of The Lost
Dark City

7/10

For other movie reviews, please check out my index page!

© 2010, 2009 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.





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Romance For Teen Vampire Lovers: Twilight Will Satisfy Young Fans, But Not Adult Moviegoers.

The Good: Good casting, Interesting fantasy storyline, Moments of character
The Bad: Plot has been done before, Dumbed down to appeal to young adults
The Basics: Fun, if a bit simplified for the young adult audience, Twilight tells a Romeo & Juliet type story (save the conflicts are largely external) with a young woman and a vampire.


When I first watched Twilight, I was in no way educated in the book series that began with Twilight.   Even now, I have not read any of the books (save the latest novella) so this review is strictly of the film Twilight. In fact, I had no idea that Twilight or its sequels existed until I was on my summer cross-country trip in 2008 and found myself at the Mall Of America for a Breaking Dawn release party at the Barnes and Noble there. The place was packed with teenage girls there for the release of the latest novel in the Twilight series and I found myself somewhat envious: I hope someday my literature might earn me legions of fans staying up until midnight to buy my books just for the thrill of being one of the first to own them. Actually, it is refreshing to see people that eager about reading.

So when I went to a screening of Twilight, I had no preconceptions. I had seen the trailers and that was about it. When I was a young adult, I probably would have been into the book and movie Twilight, though; it is fantasy and I was a big fan of fantasy and science fiction. Now, it takes a pretty special work in that genre to get me to appreciate it. Fortunately, Twilight - the movie - does that, for the most part. In fact, if anything, my real problem with it was that it tried too hard to appeal to its target demographic as opposed to serving the story it was trying to tell.

Bella Swan is a teenage girl who has moved to Forks, Washington with her father. There she finds herself less of an outcast than she was at her old school, but some of the students seem to still be standoffish with her. One of them in particular, Edward Cullen, seems to be largely indifferent to her until a freak accident nearly kills her. Bella suspects that, despite Edward's excuse of stopping an SUV with his body being an ability that comes from an adrenalin rush, there is something different about Edward and, of course, there is.

Edward, as it so happens, is a vampire. Fortunately for Bella, he is a friendly vampire who only drinks the blood of animals and is not out to hurt Bella. In fact, he and Bella soon fall for one another when he shows her both his abilities and his perspective on the world. Unfortunately for both of them, as Bella is accepted by members of Edward's family and the prom approaches, a rather fiendish vampire - James - comes to town ready to kill Bella and Edward both.

Sound familiar? Fans of science fiction and fantasy will find the plot remarkably familiar. It's the plot of the first few seasons of Buffy The Vampire Slayer. At least Joss Whedon and his team made an effort to differentiate between the vampires who were good those who weren't. In that mythos, vampirism costs the victim their soul and as a result, they simply cannot help but being soulless and evil (even if some Whedonverse vampires are more mundanely annoying or hapless in an evil way as opposed to actually malicious). Angel, the vampire Buffy falls for, is endowed with a soul and thus loathes his instincts which pull him toward murder, bloodlust and mayhem.

In Twilight there is nothing so concrete. Edward is just a decent guy who happens to be a vampire. His family are just nice people who happen to suck blood and have renounced doing it from humans. Instead, they drink the blood of animals and that is just fine with them. So, what's the difference? Twilight replaces the comedy that Joss Whedon used to buffer his fantasy notions with a strong sense of romance. This is a love story and while Bella has a pretty healthy skepticism at first, she falls with a very adolescent sense of emotion for Edward.

This is where the movie both works and fails itself. It works because Twilight portrays a very young love and it does it well (to a point). In that, Bella and Edward make for a charming young couple with Bella swooning in many of the right ways to lend a sense of realism to her character as a mid to late-teen girl. She has a very girlish sensibility about what love is and that works well because, frankly, young love can be fun and when done right it it enchanting to watch in films and television.

Where Twilight falls down is in its emphasis in the violence over the sensuality. Teen lovers make mistakes (often stupid ones) and Twilight shies away from that earning its PG-13 more for the violence than any expression of chemistry between Bella and Edward. In other words, when it comes to the moments that ought to be passionate - even in a young love kind of way - director Catherine Hardwicke pulls the punches. The result is a feeling that Twilight leaves some of its potential unfulfilled.

As well, the whole appearance of James and his little posse felt like a distraction. Actually, it felt a lot like Spike appearing in Sunnydale . . . But to stay within Twilight, the love story about a guy who is almost a century old romancing a teenager did not necessarily need a violent subplot to maintain the audience's interest. Sure, there's the whole idea that there has to be conflict, but a far more interesting one would have been Edward's internal conflict. Frankly, it would have been much more interesting to see Edward as a guy who was mature and educated enough to be striking out with older women as opposed to a guy who is essentially immortal and refuses to develop past being a teenager after a hundred years. Sure, Edward and his kin matriculate a lot, but what do they truly learn?

In other words, other than the Hollywood beautiful nature of Bella, there isn't much in the film to explain what the real attraction of Bella is to Edward. She is young (not just physically, but emotionally and intellectually) and outside being a damsel in distress who he is able to dazzle with things like running around with her on his back, there is not much that explains her appeal to him. After all, given infinite lifetimes to live as undead, one would suspect the appeal of rescuing girls who also resemble a former-favorite snack might wear thin.

In this way, Twilight disappoints adult viewers. There is very much a young adult sensibility to all of the relationships, not just Bella's. In other words, all of the relationships and characters have a simplicity to them that does not read as right to adults. It is one thing to make a movie about young adults, it is another to make one for young adults and this is clearly the latter.

That said, Twilight is remarkably well-cast. Cam Gigandet is appropriately villainous as James, even if his character is a bit monolithic and virtually all of the vampire characters look appropriately Hot Topic goth in their coloring and body language. Robert Pattinson plays well off star Kristen Stewart. Pattinson has a facade that he is able to erect that makes him appear believably more mature than a person of his years and he plays the role of Edward with a reserve that makes the character work, perhaps a bit better than common sense would indicate.

Kristen Stewart is well-cast in the role of Bella Swan. I write that she is well-cast because she is a teenage girl playing a teenage girl. This is not a significant leap of acting and, indeed, her performance is remarkably on-par with the only other performance of hers I'd seen at the time, that of her role in The Messengers. She is good enough, but how much of the performance is actual acting and how much is simply Stewart being a teenage girl is up for debate.

That said, Twilight may be derivative, but it is good enough to go see. It is fun and it is fantasy and those who like that will find enough to like about Twilight to make it the success at the box office it was pretty much guaranteed to be regardless of what critics said about it.  Now on DVD and Blu-Ray, Twilight comes loaded with a commentary track, featurettes on making the book into a movie and casting.

For other supernatural movies or love stories, please check out my reviews of:
Dark City
The Spitfire Grill
Inception

7/10

For more movie reviews, please check out my index page!

© 2010, 2009, 2008 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.
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