Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Even With Their Perfect Embodiment Of The Trendy Fruit, I Refuse To Recommend Pomegranate Jelly Bellys!


Pomegranate Jelly Belly Jelly Beans - 10 lbs bulk
Click to buy directly from Jelly Belly!


The Good: Realistic flavor, Environmentally responsible bulk, Taste does not fade
The Bad: No real nutritional value, Pomegranate is a gross, sour flavor, Foul aftertaste.
The Basics: Pomegranate. A lousy flavor in nature, a terrible flavor for Jelly Belly jelly beans, but wow did they get it right!


There are certain food trends that I cannot wait to die a sudden death and never return in my lifetime. It is a rare thing that I pan a Jelly Belly jelly bean and I think it might be unprecedented for me to pan it for a flavor it gets right. But Pomegranate is a flavor I have had in other things, most notably Celestial Seasonings teas like Cranberry Pomegranate and Goji Berry Pomegranate (reviewed here and here, respectively). From those drinks and from eating actual pomegranates, it is hard to love the pomegranate. They are a foul fruit and why Jelly Belly would plague the world with a jelly bean based upon that nasty flavor is a mystery to me.

For those who might never have had Jelly Belly jelly beans, these are easily the best jelly beans on the planet, packing a lot of flavor into a very small size. Unlike most jelly beans which are only vaguely flavored and are more based on colors, Jelly Belly jelly beans have a wide variety of actual flavors, like cotton candy, Watermelon, Strawberry Daiquiri, or their signature flavor Buttered Popcorn.

Who needs ten pounds of Pomegranate flavored Jelly Bellys? No one I know. I'd rather go into the underworld with Persephone than eat any more of these Jelly Bellys ever. Anyone who might have a sickness and actually enjoy Pomegranate Jelly Belly jelly beans will likely find that this is the best way to get them in bulk in an environmentally responsible way for the least amount of money.

Basics

Pomegranate is a flavor of Jelly Belly jelly beans. Jelly Belly jelly beans are approximately one half inch long by one quarter inch wide and they are roughly bean-shaped. These little candies are marketed to taste precisely like Pomegranate and they live up to that exceptionally well. Too well. These have the nasty sourness and loathsome aftertaste of real, unadulterated pomegranates.

Pomegranate flavored Jelly Bellys are available in a wide array of quantities, but the largest quantity available is the ten pound bulk case. This is a decent-sized box with a plastic lining and while some might wonder why anyone would need a ten pound box, I say, "I have no idea!" I suspect that for most people, a ten pound case is a year's supply of these jelly beans.

Pomegranate flavored Jelly Bellys are tough to distinguish from many of the other red Jelly Bellys. They are a dark, translucent bean, which makes them most like Strawberry Jam and they have markings both dark - like Strawberry Jam - and light, which appears to make them unique. Unfortunately, these beans are the most variable of any I have had, so some do not even have any of the light markings. Some are lighter than the dark red ones, as well. Perhaps they camouflage to disgust the unsuspecting Jelly Belly eater.

Ease Of Preparation

These are jelly beans, not outwitting Hades or eating actual pomegranates. In the case of the ten pound box, one might want to put them in a candy dish of some form as opposed to always going into the box. Then again, I cannot think why anyone would go into a box of these a second time, so perhaps one would not have to!

Taste

Pomegranate Jelly Bellys have no bouquet, so it is actually quite surprising how much flavor they pack into each and every bean. Sadly, this is a flavor that is absolutely disgusting, but entirely accurate for Pomegranates. These are fruity and sour and they taste like misery concentrated in fruit form. These taste just like pomegranates and for those who like that taste, they will fit the bill.

As well, Pomegranate flavored Jelly Bellys do not diminish in taste when you eat vast quantities of them. No, these taste like that vile fruit bite after bite, never fading and that is quite incredible. Even after the consumer is begging for death, they keep tasting like pomegranates. Wow, I wish I could get my hands on whomever started this dietary trend!

Nutrition

Again, these are jelly beans, so anyone looking to them for nutrition needs to understand they are based upon something that is likely to turn one's stomach anyway. Jelly beans, even Jelly Belly jelly beans, are not a legitimate source of nutrition. These are a snack food, a dessert, and are in no way an adequate substitute for a real meal. A serving is listed at thirty-five beans, with each Jelly Belly jelly bean having approximately four calories. This means that in a single serving, there are 140 calories, which is 12% of your daily recommended intake.

The thing is, Jelly Belly jelly beans are not as bad as they could be in the nutrition area. They have no fat and no protein, but for those who have ever dated a Vegan, these are Vegan compliant because they contain no gelatin! They have only one percent of the daily sodium with 15 mg and they are gluten free! The main ingredients are sugar, corn syrup and modified food starch, so it's not like this is an all-natural food, but they could be far, far worse.

Storage/Clean-up

Jelly Belly jelly beans have a shelf life of approximately one year and I have yet to run across a stale Jelly Belly (though that could have something to do with a package never surviving a year around me and this flavor doesn't even last six months usually). They remain freshest when they are kept in an airtight container (the bag in the bulk box is sufficient if it is kept closed) and they ought to be kept in a lukewarm environment. Storing them in hot places is likely to make the beans stick together and be gross. Kept in a cool, dry place, the beans retain their flavor perfectly.

As for cleanup, unless one allows the Jelly Belly to get hot to the point that the waxy coating on the bean melts, the dyes on these do not bleed or denature, so there is usually no cleanup necessary, not even washing one's hands after eating them (this is where I usually recommend people wash their hands before eating Jelly Bellys, but with Pomegranate, perhaps whatever you had on your fingers before eating these will get the taste of pomegranate out of your mouth). I've never had Pomegranate Jelly Bellys stain anything.

Overall

Pomegranate Jelly Belly jelly beans are a perfect embodiment of the sourest, most vile pomegranates in the world and these can safely be avoided and ought to be! Rating is more accurately a 2 1/2, if for no other reason than these beans actually taste like the fruit they are supposed to.

For other Jelly Belly flavors reviewed by me, please check out:
Coconut
French Vanilla
Sour Watermelon

3/10

For other food and drink reviews, please be sure to visit my index page by clicking here!

© 2011, 2009 W.L. Swarts. May not be reprinted without permission.





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